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Imagine she met a guy that actually just respects her- without all of the kink stuff. Then she would probably know what it's like to be in a normal, "good" relationship instead of being whacked by the low-bar and asking for more.

The bar is so low.

She champions him as so breathtakingly respectful and wonderful... But in her comments she shares that he has concerning "flaws" but it's ok! Because he asks her permission before he sexually abuses her.

A consent fetishist is a control freak wearing a meticulously crafted mask. This man is her coworker. He knows all about her, as coworkers so often do. He knows about her previous, abusive relationship. He knows exactly which mask to apply. And he's grooming her to accept anything from him.

Yeah this is the problem with the whole “consent worship” thing. Now men fixate on getting a “yes” technically out of a woman’s mouth so they have their bases covered.

When a man threatens to leave you if you don’t do X, you might say yes to X, especially if you’re young and naive. He knows you don’t want it but he’s happy to do it anyway now that his bases are covered under male law. That’s more predatory than the man who doesn’t ask at all IMO.