26

A post in another circle about Ted Bundy reminded me of this story. It was a link to a tumblr post and one of the users in the reblogs was key in my slow peaking, and subsequent desisting.

I left my upvote and kept it moving because this anecdote has little to do with OP's post, but here it is.

The user in question is appropriately-inappropriate. I remember following her many years ago because of a funny post she made that went viral. It was about a classmate she knew in college who drank a on of coffee and monster to prep for finals. Anyway.

After following her I learned quickly her stance on transgenderism as a concept. I found myself agreeing with her a lot. She was very reasonable and level headed, unlike the TRAs and trans people on my dash.

But even still, at some point I realized she was a 'terf' and I panicked. I unfollowed her so I wouldn't corrupt myself with her terfy opinions. That's genuinely how I felt at the time. This is all knowing full well that I agreed with her.

It's terrifying how the trans cult not only polices people's thoughts externally, but they get inside your head and make you police your OWN thoughts on their behalf.

Once I desisted I tried looking for her again. She's been on tumblr a long time and this was early into me fully leaning into my gender critical views. I couldn't find her. I couldn't remember her URL. I just remembered the fox icon and that one viral post. Even when I was trying on gender identities like hats I never forgot her, or the other people I'd run across who were smeared as 'transphobic' but deep down I agreed with.

I was happy to see she's still fighting the good fight on that hellsite. And I was unsettled by how much I'd shut myself off from valuable information back then.

A post in another circle about Ted Bundy reminded me of this story. It was a link to a tumblr post and one of the users in the reblogs was key in my slow peaking, and subsequent desisting. I left my upvote and kept it moving because this anecdote has little to do with OP's post, but [here it is.](https://www.ovarit.com/o/WomensLiberation/35952/ted-bundy-wasn-t-some-sexy-man-that-women-couldn-t-resist) The user in question is appropriately-inappropriate. I remember following her many years ago because of a funny post she made that went viral. It was about a classmate she knew in college who drank a on of coffee and monster to prep for finals. Anyway. After following her I learned quickly her stance on transgenderism as a concept. I found myself agreeing with her a lot. She was very reasonable and level headed, unlike the TRAs and trans people on my dash. But even still, at some point I realized she was a 'terf' and I panicked. I unfollowed her so I wouldn't corrupt myself with her terfy opinions. That's genuinely how I felt at the time. This is all knowing full well that **I agreed** with her. It's terrifying how the trans cult not only polices people's thoughts externally, but they get inside your head and make you police your OWN thoughts on their behalf. Once I desisted I tried looking for her again. She's been on tumblr a long time and this was early into me fully leaning into my gender critical views. I couldn't find her. I couldn't remember her URL. I just remembered the fox icon and that one viral post. Even when I was trying on gender identities like hats I never forgot her, or the other people I'd run across who were smeared as 'transphobic' but deep down I agreed with. I was happy to see she's still fighting the good fight on that hellsite. And I was unsettled by how much I'd shut myself off from valuable information back then.

3 comments

[+] [Deleted] 5 points

OMG, appropriately-inappropriate was such an influence on me in those years in which part of me longed for radfemmery, and part of me was convinced that if I thought the Bad Thoughts I'd turn into, I don't know, a homophobe and a racist and an anti-choice nut or something, like it would all happen at once if I admitted that trans women weren't women. Bless appropriately inappropriate. Wherever she is, and if she's reading this, you did good things.