I wasn't sure if I should post here or o/GenderCritical, so please tell me if I should be there instead. And, sorry in advance for rambling.
I'm still in high school (just one more year, thank god) and it's a complete shitshow where everyone is competing to see who's the most woke. All my friends are either TIFs or "allies" deep in the gender cult. I used to be too, but then I started questioning whether gender really exists, and desisted. My younger sister is on TikTok, so naturally, she's always saying things like "lesbians are non-men who are attracted to non-men", but then I ask her about it and she doesn't even know how to explain it, it's just a fact. People are accepting anything that anyone says, as long as it aligns with gender theory, as a fact. And I just don't know what to do anymore, because if I open my mouth, I know that I'll get shut down, labelled a "TERF", and shunned. I feel like I can't escape any of this, especially since I'm a lesbian and I look like a 14-year-old boy so everyone is always asking me my pronouns. Even my friends. What am I supposed to answer? I could just say she/her like I'm supposed to, but I'm tired of doing what the gender cult tells me I'm "supposed to do". I could also say "no thanks" but no one would understand, so that would lead to me saying "transphobic" things that will cost me my friendships.
About pronouns, it's becoming a lot more common that in a new group or class of some sort, you are required to introduce yourself with your name and pronouns. Again, I could just say she/her. This fall, I'm going back to my birth name at school so a lot of people will be confused. And I'm simultaneously embarrassed about detransitioning (because being trans gives you that special status, which I renounced), and about being involved in that bs in the first place.
I guess I'm just feeling pretty lost. I'm not sure what I'm asking for. Maybe reassurance that it gets better in university. Which I doubt, at this point. I guess what I'm looking for is advice. On one hand, I'm waking up to this increasingly misogynistic world, and I want to fight back somehow. It's probably a noob question, but how should I go about that? On the other hand, no one else I actually know shares my view. Should I somehow try to convince people that we're going entirely in the wrong direction when it comes to "progress"? Or sit back and wait until I find other people irl who can help me?