39

Is it surprising that a nerd space was overtaken by crossdressing males? No. But god for a moment, just a moment, I thought I was safe because the community didn't have pronoun tags. But who would I encounter? Why, none other than one of the TIMs that originally pushed me into peeking 120%. This is a guy I ran into years ago. He tried to nudge his way into my social group by making the most convoluted lies I'd ever heard (e.g. he was drugged and robbed by Nigerians while living as a male in Japan), and it was part of what really started making me sick of TRAs. We found his "pre-transition" photos while he was larping as an Asian woman back then. Needless to say, he's a white guy; his voice was like gravel too. So, when I confronted him about this, he tried to say he was intersex, and that he was neither male nor female, but turned female thanks to HRT. And at the same time he's also not transgender and hates trans identified people.

Now, today a couple people in this new community I joined got into an argument with him about his lies, saying that this true and honest™ lesbian woman was indeed a man. He stated that he was born without either set of gametes and genitalia. He said the doctor did an invasive procedure that made him male, and so was forced to live as male during the 3 out of the 4 seasons, as he enjoyed living as a female during the summer. He then said his dad bought testosterone pills to force a male puberty. No doctor required apparently. This caused him to develop entirely male somehow. I mean, looking at his picture, it's very clearly a male skull he's got. The brow ridge does not lie. So now that he's on estrogen, he's saying that he's 100% female because it activated his intersex genes? Or something equally stupid as far as phrasing goes. What is it with the self-hating TIMs that pose as female intersex lesbians? It's insane how common it seems to be. When asked what his genetic sex is he never answered and said he's neither because sex is a spectrum, and he linked a bunch of opinion articles.

I'm actually fairly surprised. I remember years ago there was that one "sex is a spectrum" oped, but now there's dozens and dozens. I didn't realize pop science had been so completely taken over by this batshit "progressive" concept. Examples given:

https://massivesci.com/articles/sex-gender-intersex-transgender-identity-discrimination-title-ix/

https://www.uow.edu.au/media/2021/anatomy-texts-should-show-sex-as-a-spectrum-to-include-intersex-people.php

And if you google "is sex binary?" you will be hit with a mountain of these. Sex is a bimodal distribution system. And so there is a genetic blueprint. Why is that so often denied? Humans wouldn't exist without it. No animal would. Humans evolved to have two legs, two arms, two eyes, two nostrils, and two sexes. Can this bimodal distribution system mess up? Yes, but that doesn't change someone's genetic blueprint. The base of the body is paramount in defining what your sex is, and we currently only have two models of that. This is the part where TRAs scream about XXY and all that jazz. But that doesn't actually change anything. It just means that our distribution system may throw a few curveballs to the male side. That doesn't make them less male however. A feminine male? Sure. More complicated cases may be where a fetus develops as female because the Y chromosome's SRY gene didn't activate. That still presents a female body with reproductive capabilities/potential/design/blueprints. Because that's often how we define female, which then includes women who have gone through menopause or have suffered a birth defect rendering them infertile. This is not including, however, men that have internal testicles and so forth. And that's what they don't get, and they make the same stupid argument every single time: that they're the same as infertile women, but they're not. A birth defect does not change the basal structure of the body (i.e., male or female), but instead alters the type of female or male that person ends up. In essence, whether or not a baby girl is born with a defective vulva, or a doctor does some supremely disgusting shit, that is still a baby girl with a nonstandard set of genitalia. Of course when I say anything about this it's dismissed as "right-wing hate".

And I rant about this not just because of this one TIM, as this is the third one I've come across spouting this rhetoric in the past month. The first one was a TIM begging me to have "hot lesbian sex" with him. I immediately felt revulsion and got into an argument with him. He kept playing stupid and making roundabout arguments concerning what a woman actually is. The third one was a woman I thought I befriended online, but instead it was another TIM unwilling to admit he was a TIM; simply stating that I'm a dumbass for not understanding what a second puberty is, and how it happens naturally and is in every high school biology textbook. When I asked for a link he was unable to provide one and insulted me further. Guy was very mad I kept making jokes about a potential genetic disease that would make a woman-only world too (because I read a comic about it). Obviously he fussed over what would qualify as male and dictated it should be about hormonal levels. Why else other than their magical holy water: HRT.

Anyway, I'd mostly decided to ignore the TIM in that community afterward. That is until one of the mods revealed himself: another TIM. Here was his announcement about the conversation that took place. Apparently, it's hate to simply question a TIM and then proceed to explain how his concept of "intersex" is nonsensical. I stated he would have a karyotype that's either male or female. That was what triggered the furry TIM mod in lolita dress to come out of the woodwork. Everywhere is a safe space for TIMs. But women? Lesbians? Nah. We don't deserve any. But hey, TIMs are just trying to live comfortable lives right? We're very hateful for acknowledging sex is real, which is apparently what's insulting to them. Hate is truly awful, but it's okay for him to say he hates us. I didn't bother to argue and instead left. I'm sure I'll find a community free of gender ideology. Eventually.

Oh and as a bonus to this rant. I bought a new book. I'm trying to build a library, or well, a study, which has a large focus on women's history and fiction. I saw "Outlawed" at the bookstore and the cashier said it was really good. I looked up a couple reviews before I bought it, and no surprise, the TRAs were extremely angry about "white feminism" and a "TERF western". I bought it, but the author is definitely a fan of gender theory, as denoted by the use of pronouns in bio on Twitter. This is echoed in the story through the fact the main outlaw is a nonbinary female that doesn't like pronouns. And it's heralded by critics as a great "queer" women's book that has nonbinary representation. I made it to page 70 before I started getting annoyed by this. Apparently 40 more pages and they go around tricking gay cowboys into fucking them (or talk about it?), but also reject anyone born male into their group. Not sure really how to feel about the book, but the reviews I mentioned by the trans identified people makes me laugh a lot. This one was pretty ironic in particular:

But then I got to pages 117-118, where three of these women start discussing how they have, can, and should disguise themselves as men (“that’s the best way to charm some men”), get into sexual relationships with cowboys who like other men (“plenty of cowboys like other cowboys”), and “do whatever you want to them, but your clothes stay on. And sometime while you are drinking together, you mention a horrible accident you were in a while back. Gored by a bull, whatever. That explains anything they feel or don’t feel on your body.” Because, “the good news is, most men are pretty stupid, and pretty gullible. They want to believe what you tell them.” So yeah. I do in fact draw the line at casual discussions of women tricking gay men into sexual interactions with them under false pretenses and, as a friend pointed out when the passage was sent to them, painting the queer men out to be the predators in that situation. As a trans man, and a queer man, absolutely not. I’m done. I thought I left girls trying to catfish gay men back in high school when they were doing it on the internet. I can’t go any further. Also, maybe don’t read if you have dysphoria/are worried about picking up new insecurities within dysphoria, I’d say especially if you are transmasc but since that’s what I know, I’m not sure it’s any worse.

I almost bought a book on Patricia Highsmith too, but there were too many pro-trans blurbs on the book. Patricia Highsmith of all people. Bleh. So now I feel motivated to finish some old fictional narratives, but I wonder who would publish me when I inevitably take swings at gender ideology. A little all over the place, but that's been my week online between writing papers and driving around.

/rant

Is it surprising that a nerd space was overtaken by crossdressing males? No. But god for a moment, just a moment, I thought I was safe because the community didn't have pronoun tags. But who would I encounter? Why, none other than one of the TIMs that originally pushed me into peeking 120%. This is a guy I ran into years ago. He tried to nudge his way into my social group by making the most convoluted lies I'd ever heard (e.g. he was drugged and robbed by Nigerians while living as a male in Japan), and it was part of what really started making me sick of TRAs. We found his "pre-transition" photos while he was larping as an Asian woman back then. Needless to say, he's a white guy; his voice was like gravel too. So, when I confronted him about this, he tried to say he was intersex, and that he was neither male nor female, but turned female thanks to HRT. And at the same time he's also not transgender and hates trans identified people. Now, today a couple people in this new community I joined got into an argument with him about his lies, saying that this true and honest™ lesbian woman was indeed a man. He stated that he was born without either set of gametes and genitalia. He said the doctor did an invasive procedure that made him male, and so was forced to live as male during the 3 out of the 4 seasons, as he enjoyed living as a female during the summer. He then said his dad bought testosterone pills to force a male puberty. No doctor required apparently. This caused him to develop entirely male somehow. I mean, looking at his picture, it's very clearly a male skull he's got. The brow ridge does not lie. So now that he's on estrogen, he's saying that he's 100% female because it activated his intersex genes? Or something equally stupid as far as phrasing goes. What is it with the self-hating TIMs that pose as female intersex lesbians? It's insane how common it seems to be. When asked what his genetic sex is he never answered and said he's neither because sex is a spectrum, and he linked a bunch of opinion articles. I'm actually fairly surprised. I remember years ago there was that one "sex is a spectrum" oped, but now there's dozens and dozens. I didn't realize pop science had been so completely taken over by this batshit "progressive" concept. Examples given: https://massivesci.com/articles/sex-gender-intersex-transgender-identity-discrimination-title-ix/ https://www.uow.edu.au/media/2021/anatomy-texts-should-show-sex-as-a-spectrum-to-include-intersex-people.php And if you google "is sex binary?" you will be hit with a mountain of these. Sex is a bimodal distribution system. And so there is a genetic blueprint. Why is that so often denied? Humans wouldn't exist without it. No animal would. Humans evolved to have two legs, two arms, two eyes, two nostrils, and two sexes. Can this bimodal distribution system mess up? Yes, but that doesn't change someone's genetic blueprint. The base of the body is paramount in defining what your sex is, and we currently only have two models of that. This is the part where TRAs scream about XXY and all that jazz. But that doesn't actually change anything. It just means that our distribution system may throw a few curveballs to the male side. That doesn't make them less male however. A feminine male? Sure. More complicated cases may be where a fetus develops as female because the Y chromosome's SRY gene didn't activate. That still presents a female body with reproductive capabilities/potential/design/blueprints. Because that's often how we define female, which then includes women who have gone through menopause or have suffered a birth defect rendering them infertile. This is not including, however, men that have internal testicles and so forth. And that's what they don't get, and they make the same stupid argument every single time: that they're the same as infertile women, but they're not. A birth defect does not change the basal structure of the body (i.e., male or female), but instead alters the type of female or male that person ends up. In essence, whether or not a baby girl is born with a defective vulva, or a doctor does some supremely disgusting shit, that is still a baby girl with a nonstandard set of genitalia. Of course when I say anything about this it's dismissed as "right-wing hate". And I rant about this not just because of this one TIM, as this is the third one I've come across spouting this rhetoric in the past month. The first one was a TIM begging me to have "hot lesbian sex" with him. I immediately felt revulsion and got into an argument with him. He kept playing stupid and making roundabout arguments concerning what a woman actually is. The third one was a woman I thought I befriended online, but instead it was another TIM unwilling to admit he was a TIM; simply stating that I'm a dumbass for not understanding what a second puberty is, and how it happens naturally and is in every high school biology textbook. When I asked for a link he was unable to provide one and insulted me further. Guy was very mad I kept making jokes about a potential genetic disease that would make a woman-only world too (because I read a comic about it). Obviously he fussed over what would qualify as male and dictated it should be about hormonal levels. Why else other than their magical holy water: HRT. Anyway, I'd mostly decided to ignore the TIM in that community afterward. That is until one of the mods revealed himself: another TIM. Here was [his announcement](https://media.discordapp.net/attachments/1008838522255458396/1022032314928209940/unknown.png) about the conversation that took place. Apparently, it's hate to simply question a TIM and then proceed to explain how his concept of "intersex" is nonsensical. I stated he would have a karyotype that's either male or female. That was what triggered the furry TIM mod in lolita dress to come out of the woodwork. Everywhere is a safe space for TIMs. But women? Lesbians? Nah. We don't deserve any. But hey, TIMs are just trying to live comfortable lives right? We're very hateful for acknowledging sex is real, which is apparently what's insulting to them. Hate is truly awful, but it's okay for him to say he hates us. I didn't bother to argue and instead left. I'm sure I'll find a community free of gender ideology. Eventually. Oh and as a bonus to this rant. I bought a new book. I'm trying to build a library, or well, a study, which has a large focus on women's history and fiction. I saw "Outlawed" at the bookstore and the cashier said it was really good. I looked up a couple reviews before I bought it, and no surprise, the TRAs were extremely angry about "white feminism" and a "TERF western". I bought it, but the author is definitely a fan of gender theory, as denoted by the use of pronouns in bio on Twitter. This is echoed in the story through the fact the main outlaw is a nonbinary female that doesn't like pronouns. And it's heralded by critics as a great "queer" women's book that has nonbinary representation. I made it to page 70 before I started getting annoyed by this. Apparently 40 more pages and they go around tricking gay cowboys into fucking them (or talk about it?), but also reject anyone born male into their group. Not sure really how to feel about the book, but [the reviews I mentioned by the trans identified people](https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/50997696-outlawed#other_reviews) makes me laugh a lot. This one was pretty ironic in particular: > But then I got to pages 117-118, where three of these women start discussing how they have, can, and should disguise themselves as men (“that’s the best way to charm some men”), get into sexual relationships with cowboys who like other men (“plenty of cowboys like other cowboys”), and “do whatever you want to them, but your clothes stay on. And sometime while you are drinking together, you mention a horrible accident you were in a while back. Gored by a bull, whatever. That explains anything they feel or don’t feel on your body.” Because, “the good news is, most men are pretty stupid, and pretty gullible. They want to believe what you tell them.” So yeah. I do in fact draw the line at casual discussions of women tricking gay men into sexual interactions with them under false pretenses and, as a friend pointed out when the passage was sent to them, painting the queer men out to be the predators in that situation. As a trans man, and a queer man, absolutely not. I’m done. I thought I left girls trying to catfish gay men back in high school when they were doing it on the internet. I can’t go any further. Also, maybe don’t read if you have dysphoria/are worried about picking up new insecurities within dysphoria, I’d say especially if you are transmasc but since that’s what I know, I’m not sure it’s any worse. I almost bought a book on Patricia Highsmith too, but there were too many pro-trans blurbs on the book. Patricia Highsmith of all people. Bleh. So now I feel motivated to finish some old fictional narratives, but I wonder who would publish me when I inevitably take swings at gender ideology. A little all over the place, but that's been my week online between writing papers and driving around. /rant

17 comments

There's an old internet joke, "There are no girls on the Internet.". When I was younger, this made me so mad - I felt entirely erased, even though I spent WAY too much time online.

However, I'm starting to see the point behind it. In anonymous spaces, the likelihood of you talking to a male is far greater than talking to a female. Women and girls usually keep their sex hidden, so as to not invite harassment.

If you run an online space that bills itself for women and girls, and you allow people to join to have the option of self-declaring their sex, you will get males 100% of the time. They simply cannot help themselves.

It's fucking bizarre to me bc I have zero, no, LESS than zero desire to join an exclusively XY group. I want to stay as far away from them as possible lol

They think everyone is male even if your real name is staring them in the face, don't put your picture up online or their attitude towards you changes and you just get insulted.

I don't think theres any meaning behind "there are no girls on the internet" its exactly that, that is what they like to think, and if you reveal yourself they will try and bully you off as they think its their space.

yeah back in the day "GIRL" (as in, on the internet) stood for "Guy In Real Life"

yesterday a TIM joined a linux group I'm in with my boyfriend. he had a trans flag in his bio.

some bot with a female name joined, and my bf replied to it, "woman". then the TIM replied to him, "yes I am one, so what?"

then my bf and every other guy in that group started taunting the TIM saying that there are no female linux users lol. I can't object to that either, since I haven't touched a single linux distro myself.

he was like, "why are you saying this," and I said, "anyone can lie about their sex." then he said, "it's 2022, almost 2023, and the correct term is "gender"." then the other guys started taunting him with that, i mean, people like that are so easy to make fun of. I can't blame them.

I often feel this dichotomy. On one hand I loathe the idea of being erased and feel as though representation online is important. At the same time, the internet is very much so overrun by boisterous males with deep perversions. How I choose to react is generally very mood dependent. I've come to a point where I just let people assume what I am, and when I say something they as males cannot relate to (e.g. using crayons to put makeup on dolls as a kid), they usually experience some form of cognitive dissonance. I would be lying if I said I didn't find it somewhat amusing.

I think I know the guy you mean. It's hilarious you called him on his bullshit.

The thing is, even on the off-chance he was actually intersex, intersex men can still be AGP. It happens at the same rate as the general population. So even if he was an extremely rare AGP male "lucky" to be born with a real DSD, it doesn't preclude him from being a typical run-of-the-mill perverted male "transbian" like all the rest.

It's kind of ironic because if we're thinking of the same guy, he actually probably could pass as a female with his DSD story, if he didn't act so extremely typically "herm fetish" AGP.

He said the doctor did an invasive procedure that made him male

Lol, when intersex baby boys are butchered by doctors they are almost always given a "vagina" as it's far easier to remove tissue than recreate it. (Just look at TIF vs TIM surgeries and the complication rates. TIFs blow TIMs outta the water.)

At first I read the discord message as “If you hate people who are just trying to live a comfortable lie, I hate you.” And was like oh? But then I reread it and realized.

To be honest, I have never been in a discord group that wasn’t proudly full tq except my personal friend groups and the radfem groups. Pretty much every other virtual community space on discord believes in the transgender craze… and, really, it isn’t surprising to me. It’s a private server app that in some ways encourages group think and is rife for abusers to find people who are actively online, and in games, and dm them harassment. Because it is also targeted towards gamers, it is heavily male, and, sadly, also draws a large child audience. Small communities basically have to self regulate because there’s nothing public about most forums and people will feel no shame in sharing lies, inappropriate content, etc, especially with minors. And the best part? If you get banned with an account, it’s super easy to just make a new one and get an invite back to a server. It is basically the perfect storm for abusers and transgender lies.

I’m sorry that a community you were a part of is showing it’s true colors, and I hope you can find a better space.

[–] Tiramisuomi 3 points Edited

a TIM begging me to have "hot lesbian sex" with him. I immediately felt revulsion and got into an argument with him. He kept playing stupid and making roundabout arguments concerning what a woman actually is.

Once, just once, I'd like to throw the fact that they know damn well what a woman is because they expressly said that they're able to tell in their face. Do they have slobbering, 5-o-clock shadow men with receding hairlines in mind when they fantasize about hot lesbian sex? Do they honestly expect to see an intersex organ or penis during this hot lesbian sex?

They'll say yes of course, but they're lying to themselves.

This is echoed in the story through the fact the main outlaw is a nonbinary female that doesn't like pronouns. And it's heralded by critics as a great "queer" women's book that has nonbinary representation. I made it to page 70 before I started getting annoyed by this. Apparently 40 more pages and they go around tricking gay cowboys into fucking them (or talk about it?), but also reject anyone born male into their group.

I mean, I haven't read the book and don't intend to, but the way you've described plus the review including predatory sexual behavior kind of sounds like the book is pointing out issues with the gender ideology movement. I could be wrong though. Again, haven't read the book, and Poe's law is so strong these days that I can't tell what's a joke and what's not anymore. 🤷‍♀️

[–] hontrapoints 0 points Edited

Not particularly related to your post, but interestingly enough it is possible he was robbed by a Nigerian man while in Japan. Tokyo has a few sizeable West African communities, Nigerian being one of the largest ones. And a lot of them own or work at bars. So it's entirely plausible he was beat up by a Nigerian bouncer for being an asshole at a bar or something and he just embellished the story.

He wasn't beat up. He made up this story about how he was drugged because he willingly drank their drinks they got him, but that was later changed to them slipping something in his drink while they were next to him. The story changed over the past several years regarding what happened after. At first he said he was so high he could barely move, but was in a good mood and obeyed his Nigerian overlords to spend all of his credit card's limit ($6,000+) at department stores. And not one person apparently questioned this while he was drug all over various shopping districts. I recall him telling me in particular that he seemed fine on the outside, but wasn't. This later became a story about them taking him to an ATM to take all the money out of his account rather than going on a department store shopping spree. I guess it magically switched from credit to debit. Unless he somehow did a cash advance with horrible interest. From there he supposedly made a police report, but the police didn't care, and neither did the credit card company. So he fled the country. When asked if he had a copy of the police report he said it was online, but then made up a story about it's impossible for him to copy and paste the link. That resulted in him screenshotting a photo of the police station on Google Maps telling the person to do it himself.