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I just watched Ellen/Elliot Page's recent interview with Oprah today...here are my takeaways.

The level of deep-seeded internalized misogyny struck me most. It's almost painful to watch. I sympathize with her hearing her speak. Knowing the pressure on regular women to look sexually pleasing and attractive to men, I can't imagine how that pressure would be multiplied for women in the public eye. It almost makes sense - the only way Ellen Page could avoid being sexualized and ridiculed for her looks was to identify as a man.

A couple of other things:

  1. She looks sick. Her voice is quivering. It's almost tough to see.
  2. Disappointingly no questions on how she knew she was a man other than her wanting short hair and having male friends as a kid. Felt like pandering.
  3. The term "gender euphoria"... she uses this a lot. This is a really weird way to characterize gender dysphoria.
  4. Her lack of confidence - she seems scared and uncomfortable the entire time.

I just felt bad for her. It seems like her life in hollywood really made her feel a lack of agency. I simultaneously wanted to hug her and shake her and scream "YOU CAN WEAR A SUIT TO THE OSCARS THATS FINE!"

Edit - grammar

I just watched Ellen/Elliot Page's recent interview with Oprah today...here are my takeaways. The level of deep-seeded internalized misogyny struck me most. It's almost painful to watch. I sympathize with her hearing her speak. Knowing the pressure on regular women to look sexually pleasing and attractive to men, I can't imagine how that pressure would be multiplied for women in the public eye. It almost makes sense - the only way Ellen Page could avoid being sexualized and ridiculed for her looks was to identify as a man. A couple of other things: 1. She looks sick. Her voice is quivering. It's almost tough to see. 2. Disappointingly no questions on how she knew she was a man other than her wanting short hair and having male friends as a kid. Felt like pandering. 3. The term "gender euphoria"... she uses this a lot. This is a really weird way to characterize gender dysphoria. 4. Her lack of confidence - she seems scared and uncomfortable the entire time. I just felt bad for her. It seems like her life in hollywood really made her feel a lack of agency. I simultaneously wanted to hug her and shake her and scream "YOU CAN WEAR A SUIT TO THE OSCARS THATS FINE!" Edit - grammar

81 comments

[–] butchnerd 35 points (+35|-0)

Same... it's all so tough to watch.

I know she was never the biggest star in the world... but it's astonishing to me how lost and lonely she seems! I am aware that she and her wife separated, which must be really hard, but like... where were/are your friends? Haven't you met any other lesbians? How are you so well-known but act like you've never attended a single therapy session in your life? It's so sad and kinda infuriating at the same time.

I simultaneously hug her and shake her and scream "YOU CAN WEAR A SUIT TO THE OSCARS THATS FINE!"

Yes, this.

[–] Jack_the_Lass 25 points (+25|-0) Edited

She says in the interview that she came to the realization she's a he after spending a bunch of time in solitude in Nova Scotia during the pandemic. I don't think that kind of solitude is good for anyone and I have voiced this concern about other friends during the pandemic.

I actually first realized this almost 10 years ago when a close friend of mine decided to go off and live in a yurt in the woods with very little human contact. When I talked to him again he really had gone just kind of (to put it nicely) loony. To be alone in your own head for that amount of time is dangerous. You're your own echo chamber, you get too self involved in your own thoughts.

A friend and colleague of my wife's who lives alone pretty much cut himself off from everyone during the pandemic. Recently (post vaccinations) he came over to have a drink with my wife and confessed to her he thinks he may "come out" as non-binary after the pandemic. How did he come to that conclusion? Watching Tiktok. (He's in his 30s) My wife, to her credit, really pressed him on what that means and he admitted it means shit like lipstick and nail polish. She told him how and why she thinks such gender stereotypes are extremely regressive and why we, as lesbians, are so deeply offended by it. She also told him about the transing of gay people in Iran, which he had no idea about.

Anyways, TLDR; its not good or healthy to be in that kind of solitude when you are not mentally well.

[–] immersang 17 points (+17|-0)

She says in the interview that she came to the realization she's a he after spending a bunch of time in solitude in Nova Scotia during the pandemic.

Wait a minute....so, she came to that conclusion during the pandemic, and she has already cut her breasts off? Holy shit. This is worse than I thought. How can any medical professional do this in good conscience?!

Because even though COVID might feel like a life time, it has only been a little over a year. That's insane.

She’s probably got a therapist giving her gender-affirming care...

[–] butchnerd 20 points (+20|-0) Edited

Yeah, probably... which means she still hasn't been to a therapist who actually helps her feel better. :(

[–] XX_Power 13 points (+13|-0)

I can only imagine how impossible it must be to be an honest therapist with celebrities like her, who are used to yes men since they were children. I feel that if a therapist tried to actually help her instead of giving her injections and beauty surgery, she might just dump them and publicly call them a transphobe. I know i wouldn't touch that with a 10 foot pole.

[–] tamata 16 points (+16|-0)

I could be wrong but it's my understanding that it's a common experience for people when they reach a certain level of fame, it becomes extremely difficult to find people that you (1) like, (2) understand, and (3) trust. It seems like that's why the celebrities who are usually more well-off in the long term are the ones who have always had their family and (pre-fame) close friends looking out for and grounding them. (As opposed to managers and lawyers and whatnot.)

In Elliot's case, Hollywood is a big enough enemy on its own, so the fact that she took on the TRA monster along with it, well... I simply cannot imagine that she is mentally or emotionally well adjusted and dearly hope that she has people who will pick her up off the ground when the cameras aren't rolling anymore.

[–] butchnerd 13 points (+13|-0)

You're certainly right, the fame must make it hard to trust people... I just hoped she had someone, anyone around her.

I didn't watch the entire Oprah interview... but did she mention her family at all? Mom, Dad, anybody? I guess there's a chance they never really accepted her for being a lesbian, IDK :(

On a random but slightly funny note, I checked her Wikipedia page and found this is still listed as her official website:

https://ellen.page/

Everything there still says Ellen... definitely bittersweet to look at now.

[–] butchnerd 10 points (+10|-0)

Replying to my own post because I'm stuck on this thought... Ellen Page went through with a double mastectomy before she could be bothered to get her personal website updated. Now that's mental illness, luv.

[–] questioningtw 3 points (+3|-0)

That is the way I feel too! It bothers the hell out of me that people would rather cheer for someone to transition, even though it is obviously affecting their health, instead of supporting their choice to just wear suits instead of dresses.