Welcome New Members Peak Trans Reprise V: Tell your story here

I used to identify as nonbinary on Tumblr because I wanted to fit in and it sounded cool. I had Shinigami Eyes installed, and I blocked every "TERF" I saw on a blocklist. During the time, I read their blogs, agreeing with the ideas, but I felt guilty reblogging from an evil woman, so I reblogged from the original poster if I was able to. A 15 year old brown girl and her girlfriend were being harassed for showing sources on transwomen being rapists, pedophiles, etc. On the girl's blog was a post about menstrual huts and a GoFundMe link to donate to. I was tired at that point so I reblogged the post and all my mutuals harrassed me about it because it was tagged "radfem". I eventually remade and read radfem theory, finding myself agreeing with it and now I'm here.

I'm detrans. I had multiple mini-peaks during my transitioning journey, the most significant one being when I tried to date a trans woman and she wanted to use her "junk" to "scissor" with me without a condom (because condoms made her "dysphoric") and then in typical male fashion got pissed off when I said nope, not happening. Tbh it wasn't happening with or without a condom.

The second one was when a friend of mine said they always knew I was a trans guy because I was obsessive about computer science like a guy. It made me incredibly sad because this was a fellow female graduate student in computer science, and my obsession stems from ADHD hyperfixation (I'm diagnosed) and not any gender identity shit.

I used to be a supporter with minor doubts that I tried to brush off because ultimately I was still a supporter. Had some FTM friends but no MTF friends I was close to. Fast forward, I start dating my boyfriend. No details here but definitely some more violent, aggressive, depraved kinks and fetishes. Eventually he came out as trans - based off previous discussions I think I saw it coming but I was still kind of weirdly devastated when it happened - I cried. They asked me at one point if I wanted to see their girldick. I cringed and I honestly only said yes to be nice, even though I knew I didn't want to - and I felt bad about this! Fast forward again and I end up meeting someone who I am able to be open about these doubts and moments of disgust with and I still didn't want to admit it to myself but I still thought, I'm having doubts about this trans stuff now, if anything it's not fair to my ex. So I broke things off with him.

Never felt more relief. I don't wanna see or hear about your girldick. I don't want to hear about you how experienced gender validation when someone called you a bitch. I don't want to talk about BDSM with you. I don't want to watch lesbian porn with trans women in it. You did not have the same experiences I did as a little girl when you were a little boy. You are not having the same experiences I am as a woman that you are right now as a man. It's soooo strange how you feel alienated from these other aspects of being a woman except the sexual ones, right? He even talked about wanting to experiment with bisexuality. I didn't think about it then, but after we broke up I started reading a lot of gender critical and trans critical stuff and I remember cringing when I realized he seemed to fit some descriptions of an AGP.

So, that shoved me in this direction a LOT. But I think the final, massive nail in the coffin was a female friend of mine started dating a TiM. About 3 weeks later she came out as nonbinary with a male name and they/them pronouns. She already did have a handful of gender special friends so I think that wasn't the ONLY influence, the TiM could've had little influence, but still my immediate reaction was "wow, that happened fast." Any small pro-trans parts of me that I was holding onto after the AGP realization was knocked out of me. I remember the person I spoke to critically about trans stuff with kept talking about it being a contagion and I wanted to reject that but it felt really spooky to feel like I had just witnessed it happening. Anyways, after that moment I thought yeah that's it, I can't actively support this anymore. I don't like to make a fuss so at least for now I just neutrally go along with it with certain friends but as the future goes on I'd like to have a wider berth. But it seems like it's coming from all sides these days, so I don't know how I will fare in the future if I face a situation I really don't agree with.

Reposting this here since I posted it in the wrong circle:

I started grad school last year. Super liberal student body, stupidly high tuition, and numerous clubs in our branch of the uni dedicated to everyone except women.

I knew I did not fit in with the rest of the crowd when I was one of a few people during our first zoom class without pronouns in my name. Someone “politely” messaged me, asking me to add them, and I did not see the message until the end of class. To avoid any further annoying conversations, I added them to my name. Whatever.

On International Women’s Day this year, I posted a short message in the group chat and was immediately bombarded with replies about how “women” was no longer an acceptable term— the proper way to write it is “womxn.” I questioned the dozen people who took the time to rant at me as to why I should delete my message, as far as I knew there were no TIMs in the group. No one could give me a single explanation besides it is “offensive.” Offensive? You are telling me the word “woman” is offensive on a day meant to celebrate women?

So, yeah. That was the day I stopped talking to my classmates and cemented my decision that it was not my time to attend grad school (between this crowd of people with their megaphones and Instagram stories, the high tuition for online education, and wanting to live life before committing to a career, it was an easy choice).

I really wish I had screenshots, but I guess I’m a closeted radfem and I had no one to share that buffoonery with.

"Many of us accepted the claims of trans activists, wanting to be tolerant and kind, until we really listened to what they were saying and compared it to our own knowledge and experience."

Wow, this one hits me right in the face. I was always a bit wary of the genderideology. First because of the complete takeover of the LGBT+ community. Everything was suddenly about trans issues which progressed to today where should accept girldick, gays should accept boypussy and bi's are TRANSPHOBIC as Bi means two. But as a straight woman in a relationship with a bisexual, I didn't think it was my place to say it out loud, especially since there was no backlash from the community.

Then the annoying gender stereotypes came up, going completely against what I was taught as a young girl in the 90's. Which turned into the erasure of women spaces, erasing women in history, transing children, transing almost everybody, trans identifying males whining about periods, the stupid battles about pronouns and rather stupid pronouns, the misogyny, the insane claim 'hormone therapy is innocent and reversible'... I could go on for ages.

I still sometimes feel bad as I am a rather unfriendly but quite nice person. I don't like to hurt anyone. But this almost cultish thing is hurting people. I can't agree with the erasure of women, the erasure of years of fighting for women's rights and LGB rights and going back to insane strict gender roles.

Their fetishization with women’s problems and overall dismissal of them are big ones. From some of them wanting to be catcalled to “trans periods are worse”. It’s disgusting. Then, the absolutely hatred these people harbor for actual women is terrifying—especially because these men are allowed to be in our spaces. I’d be okay if they’d respect us, but they hate that we even exist and talk so much about raping us. Yet, they’re protected.

Seems like another way to oppress women to me.

Edit: Forgot to add them taking over wlw spaces and them spinning it as we’re horrible for not wanting “girl dick” as a HUGE peak. I’ve been in a relationship for a bit, so I’ve been out the dating scene before it started getting really bad. However, I am so sorry for my fellow bis, lesbians, etc. still in. I really wish y’all the best and the absolute minimum interaction with TIMs. Stay safe and strong.

This all happened before the pandemic. I used to run a group for mostly immigrant women to get together and share their stories and experiences but all women were welcome as long as no one was arrogant and felt that their experience was more oppressive than another’s.

It was a great group of about 20 women and their kids. Most were from middle eastern countries so had strict rules about being in the company of men who aren’t directly related.

Everyone brought a dish to share and we had some toys and games for the kids. This happened once a week.

Everything was great for 2 years then one trans woman wanted to join and because they passed pretty well and I was under the trans spell. I allowed them to join.

It didn’t take long for their male socialization to take over. Very entitled, loud, uncouth, their struggles were worse than the women who literally just fled war, talking over the women etc.

Soon they brought a friend who was also trans and than another and it just snowballed from there. I had to tell them to leave and as you can imagine. The community center had to put a stop to our weekly gathering because it wasn’t inclusive.

I said eff that and moved it to my house. We no longer accept member who aren’t vouched for by a current member.

The snart also tried to get it canceled in MY HOME but the cops said there isn’t anything they could do as it’s my private property and can keep people out for whatever reason.

They have been calling CPS on me saying that children were in danger etc. and every time they showed up they saw happy kids, plenty of food and a lot of women enjoying each others company.

I will be starting it again in the spring of 22.

The craze hit my social group like a ton of bricks. I was concerned for my friends who were caught up in it but they were a little older than the Tumblr crowd and retained some of their reasonable qualities and never abused me for being a woman who refused to play the trans game.

I peaked because my job situation became extremely gender fanciful and libfem faux-woke. My boss is extremely well-meaning but has bought into the whole charade and fostered an environment of misogyny and narcissistic abuse. Several of my younger coworkers are sheltered white girls who grew up Christian and have traded one religion for another, now they’re queer and gay and non-binary and whatever. The older people playing this game are narcissistic TIMs and straight white “woke” women who are “queer” and hate “cis men” etc

They are absolutely exhausting and I am so done

For me it was trans people trying to change my sexuality and harassing me for it. The immense amount of homophobia I got from trans people. I'm a lesbian, and I refuse to sleep with men, even those in dresses. I do not want any dick. And I have literally been called terrible things, I've seen lesbian friends of mine get literal death threats. I've seen trans people say that lesbians should be killed because we are ''transphobic''. That's when I realized they arent allies at all, they want to erase people like me. I had to peak.

I've peaked for awhile now, but I peaked myself by self-censorship. That is, I censored myself from saying periods were women's issues and I realized how ridiculous the Woke camp was.

My country isn't very deep into gender ideology yet (we're getting there tho, at least colleges are). What peaked me was a certain internet forum for women. I know gossiping is bad and all but it keeps me entertained sometimes. In this forum there was a MTF thread that caught my attention. When I thought of transwomen I would think of like, very passing people who wanted to just live their life as they liked and didn't bother anyone (as lesbians and gay men do), but I was horrified to learn the truth. First I was shocked at how they looked, then I learned about their violent threats against women, their demand into women's spaces, their AGP and more. They just became another part of the internet circus for me, like many other people in the forum until the super straight thing happened, that was what motivated me to join Ovarit and got me deep into feminism (which I admittedly was very ignorant about) and the truth of the trans movement.