Reddit thread archived here: https://archive.md/17Ih3

So this straight male Redditor met a beautiful woman via a mutual friend and they went on a few successful dates, sharing a kiss at one point. When he asked her to be his girlfriend, she told him she was trans a man. He makes sure to write in his Reddit post that he wasn't angry about this 🙄, just uninterested, and that he gently turned "her" down while still attempting to remain friends. So the TIM turned all the redditor's friends against him because he's "transphobic", and he posted on r/relationships for validation that he'd done nothing wrong.

The hypocrisy is unbelievable. Not only has this dude's post not been taken down for transphobia, but everyone is on his side. Everyone's reassuring him that he's not transphobic, his response is understandable, and that the TIM and their mutual friends were in the wrong.

From the top comment:

You’re completely justified, genitalia is pretty important in sexual relationships.

While that commenter adds a caveat that it's okay or reject a TIM if he hasn't had "bottom surgery" (as if that changes your sex), OP didn't know whether the TIM he rejected had the surgery or not. Would this commenter who claims to believe this nonsense let a woman off the hook if she rejected a TIM without even knowing if he'd cast the magic penis-to-vagina spell on himself?

Other comments:

WTF, even if this person had bottom surgery, it's not transphobic to not want to date or have sex with a trans person. It's called sexual preference. OP said that he's straight.

your “friends” sound more like a group with an agenda and it’s not about being your friend.

After OP reveals that his friend who introduced him to the TIM knew that he was a TIM all along:

Your "friend" was setting you up...this is an evil thing to do. Your "friends" know your sexual orientation and what they did was at least as bad as when a straight guy tries to "convert" a lesbian

This commenter added:

Their criticism is very rapey.

More comments:

She sounds like a manipulative asshole and she should have told you sooner. Your "friends" also suck. You dodged a lot of bullets here.

This homophobic commenter didn't get his comment deleted or get banned from the sub or sitewide, even though he's also harshly criticising the sacred trans caste and uses accurate negative descriptors for the TIM and his friend group. Tell me you're a man without telling me:

Unfortunately some ppl in the lgbt+ community are very unhinged and are not able to have empathy towards straight ppl. His "friends" really think that if he doesn't feel attracted towards a trans woman it means he hates trans and is transphobic. They really believe there is no difference between a trans woman and a born (?) woman. The best course of action to him is to find new friends that are not toxic and unhinged

Would a woman get away with that?

There's general agreement that the TIM is in the wrong and that his friend group is incredibly toxic, not to mention crazy, to suddenly cut OP out for "transphobia" after knowing him for years. He dodged a bullet!

Excuse me? According to TRAs, including the ones who have taken over Reddit and social media, a woman who sexually rejects a TIM is absolutely transphobic, and cutting her out of your friend group without warning, no matter how long you've been close, is the righteous course of action— as is public humiliation, doxxing and harassment, violent and sexual threats, getting her blacklisted from her career and/or fired from the job where she struggles to make ends meet, getting her expelled from her school/university, and straight-up assaulting her. In fact, anyone who doesn't do any of this, or worse, questions it, is guilty by association.

Maybe these particular commenters are commenting this way because they are not TRAs. Some of them definitely seem like homophobic bros who only hate trans because trans is marketed as gay rights 2.0. But could you imagine a woman posting an anecdote like this on Reddit and not only not getting deleted/banned, but getting unanimous support that itself doesn't get deleted? Everyone telling her she's not transphobic, of course she wouldn't want a TIM because she is a lesbian, and her friend group's behaviour is messed up and wrong and that she dodged a bullet? Would the TIM be the one they call manipulative?