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Over the past few months, I’ve been educating my bf on trans bullshit and how it is erasing women’s rights. Admittedly this often takes the form of ranting and raving but thankfully he has the patience of a saint and is a good listener.

Anyway, he went for a long walk with three friends (all male) last night and when he got home, he was all excited and told me that I’d be proud of him as he spoke to them about the Wi Spa incident and male inmates being moved to female prisons. He also explained to them what autogynephilia is.

Only one of them pushed back on it and came out with some bullshit arguments that made no sense whatsoever which is nothing new for TRAs. The other two (one is conservative and the other is liberal I think) seemed to agree with my bf.

I’m really chuffed that he did this as it proves to me that he truly cares about women’s rights (not that I needed proof but it’s good to have anyway). Also, he’s an absolutely brilliant debater and is great at getting his point across as he studied history at uni so I think he will have managed to peak at least one of them!

Over the past few months, I’ve been educating my bf on trans bullshit and how it is erasing women’s rights. Admittedly this often takes the form of ranting and raving but thankfully he has the patience of a saint and is a good listener. Anyway, he went for a long walk with three friends (all male) last night and when he got home, he was all excited and told me that I’d be proud of him as he spoke to them about the Wi Spa incident and male inmates being moved to female prisons. He also explained to them what autogynephilia is. Only one of them pushed back on it and came out with some bullshit arguments that made no sense whatsoever which is nothing new for TRAs. The other two (one is conservative and the other is liberal I think) seemed to agree with my bf. I’m really chuffed that he did this as it proves to me that he truly cares about women’s rights (not that I needed proof but it’s good to have anyway). Also, he’s an absolutely brilliant debater and is great at getting his point across as he studied history at uni so I think he will have managed to peak at least one of them!

67 comments

[–] tahmahrah 18 points (+18|-0) Edited

My partner and I went to visit some friends we haven't seen since March 2020 a couple of weeks ago. The friends in question were his ex-roommate/best friend, his girlfriend, and his mother, all of whom live in a house together. Being lower-income South Americans, everyone there leaned left, but the girlfriend in particular, who comes from an affluent white family, was quite woke, as privileged young people tend to be nowadays.

Anyway, roommate and his momma are Brazilian, which means that whenever a guest comes over they always cook up a storm, and as mothers do, the matriarch of the household ended up making way too much food. But it was all delicious, so I ate a lot of it. I mean, it would be rude not to go for thirds, right?

So, a couple hours later, I need to make a quick stop to the bathroom. Except it took a while, I was backed up.

I come out, about 15 minutes later, to see him passionately ranting about the trans thing, while he absentmindely scritches the cat on his lap, with another one at his side, one behind him, and two at his feet.

He peaked everyone in the house that night. Even the girlfriend, after some initial pushback, which he handled like a pro.

He makes me proud sometimes.

[–] Rag3 17 points (+17|-0)

Fantastic. May you both peak the minds of many!

[–] NewMa 15 points (+15|-0)

Attaboy. And good for you for putting it in his brain.

[–] BogHag 10 points (+14|-4) Edited

Radical feminism has a lot of overlap with Marxism. Both are based in materialism and deal with class and power structures. I'm a libertarian socialist (anarcho-communist) and there are plenty of other radfem communists. You don't have to agree but it's a weird, needless dig.

Edit: (In case anyone comes later, the post originally had a bit about Communism. This probably seems really off topic now lol)

[–] gizmocaca [OP] 17 points (+21|-4) Edited

My issue with communism is that it only works in theory, not in practice. I’m admittedly not well versed in it but I see a lot of TIMs who claim to be communist and that has probably tainted my view of communists.

That being said, I’m sorry to have offended you and I’ll edit that part out now.

If you have any information on the links between radical feminism and Marxism, I would be happy to read it!

[–] visits_radio 19 points (+23|-4)

I appreciate radical feminism's critique of capitalistic exploitation of women and their bodies (reproduction and sexual). However, I agree with you that communism is a very bad idea.

[–] Zuritza 12 points (+16|-4)

I had relatives in 2 different communist countries and visited them when I was a child. It’s hard for me to hear philosophical talks about communism without a reference to real life experiences. Please if you can research how Stalin starved Ukrainians who resisted collectivizing. These people maybe had 1 cow and a few pigs and he closed the rail stations so people could not escape, and confiscated grain. People caught in this had to choose which of their children got food to live and which children were to die. Millions died of starvation.

https://cla.umn.edu/chgs/educator-resources-opportunities/resources/holodomor

[–] gizmocaca [OP] 12 points (+16|-4)

Knowing about the atrocities that actual communist regimes have committed is the reason I can’t support communism.

Thank you for the link and I hope your relatives are much better off now than they were under communist regimes.

[–] BogHag 9 points (+12|-3)
  1. There are a lot of ideas of what a communist system would look like. Authoritarianism exists within both capitalist and communist systems. There are communist ideologies which are authoritarian. Most aren't.

  2. Can we attribute acts of violence and brutality done under a capitalist system to capitalism? We could talk about US involvement in Latin America, in Vietnam, Cambodia, Laos, and in the Middle East as modern atrocities of capitalism. Much of modern imperialism is driven by capitalist ambition for greater control of global resources.

[–] NotASupportHuman 6 points (+11|-5) Edited

👏👏👏 I'm so sick of Westerners with zero experience of communism or Stalinism or Marxism in practice tout the benefits. Philosophy is grand but usually does not translate to equitable outcomes when deployed.

Lately in my Insta feed young women genuflect at the altar of the aforementioned and deny history.

Like wtf, how can anyone deny the atrocities that Stalin committed? Mao, I mean how in the fuck is Mao's continued influence serving China's populace? And Marx? Really? I am educated in these perspectives and reject them due to their overwhelmingly poor practical deployment.

I don't feel guilty for busting my ass and achieving - maybe if more people worked hard and smart they would get it but they prefer to lament what could have been if everything was handed to them allowing them to sulk around lazily while the rest of us contribute to GDP. Those able to contribute should, those unable should be supported by the system.

[–] PGTips4Lyfe 4 points (+4|-0)

My SO is from Ukraine, his family traded hooch vodka for gasoline, and lived on food stamps most of his life. Even sugar was rationed when he was growing up. Communism never works.

People have no idea about how the entire idea always ends up artificially inflating the value of labor, creating inflation, which leads to economic depression, reduced availability of goods, and lack of purchasing power.

[–] BogHag 10 points (+14|-4) Edited

I'd argue capitalism doesn't work well in practice either given the state of the planet. We're eating through the world's resources and poisoning the air, earth, and water in pursuit of generating greater wealth for the wealthy. Capitalism is always touted for its efficiency and meritocratic nature, but the actual outcomes say otherwise. Saying "it works in theory" is pretty reductive given that there are so many ideas of what a communist system should look like.

Here's a quick link to get you started:

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Marxist_feminism

Major areas of interest are porn, prostitution, unpaid female labor at home and in the workplace. Marx and Engels were way ahead of their time and wrote about the importance of women's liberation as part of a communist revolution. Women's labor at home and as a reproductive resource rendered them an exploited class.

I'd also highly recommend actually sitting down and reading the Communist Manifesto or some communist theory. It likely isn't what you've been lead to believe. Richard Wolff can be a great resource for understanding alternatives to the current system. To give you a simple, hands on example. For me, it's about eliminating the existence of an ownership class and restructuring businesses such that those who create wealth with their labor in an organization, such as a business, have a direct say in how the business is run. What are the tradeoffs between additional wealth which might be generated and the quality of life of the workers? What percentage of value generated should be invested in growth or R&D? As compared to the decisions being made by a small minority of elite workers in pursuit of the greatest possible returns for a group that doesn't perform any labor for the business and merely invested capital and is owed certain returns on the investment of capital. Think collective bargaining, worker co-ops, prioritizing collective decision making. Another great resource on this, especially in the US is The People's History of the United States by Zinn. It's a history of the US which goes into the impact of labor unions, the importance of collective bargaining, and gives a greater understanding of why Communism and Marxism and the radical left are so disjointed and confused in this country. (Spoiler Alert, the US govt has spent a lot of time and energy cutting the legs out from underneath labor to benefit the capitalist class.) If you want to talk specifics, we can chat.

Also, brocialists and male "communists" can generally fuck off. Male "communists" have a nasty habit of discounting theory the moment it applies to women and their labor. There are quite a few "communists" whose theory applies from the waist up. This isn't what Marx or Engels described. I encourage you to mock them, mercilessly.

[–] gizmocaca [OP] 12 points (+12|-0)

I completely agree with you about capitalism, the system is completely broken. I just don’t personally believe that communism is the solution.

I will keep an open mind though and read through the link you posted and if it is alright with you, I’ll get back to you if I have any questions.

[–] PGTips4Lyfe 3 points (+4|-1)

I totally agree with you about capitalism, but communism is not going to work either.

Communism always ends up killing innovation, which is what we are desperate for in our society to solve climate change. Through the artificial inflation of low skill wages (in various ways, both directly and indirectly) communism also always ends up devaluing labor and thus devaluing any currency involved with it, which causes depression through inflation, which causes severe issues for the people.

That's why for example, my SO who grew up in the Soviet Union, had to have food stamps nearly whole life, despite coming from a family with a grandfather who was a war hero on one side, and another grandfather who was a tank commander (an actual major-general) on the other.

Bread lines are always the end result of communism and they are never good.

Look at how Russia is still a crap country now, even 30 years after the USSR fell. The inflation under communism made it so when the country fell apart people were buying helicopters and tanks for a few hundred dollars each...and the original corrupt government of KGB leeches merely re-appeared under a different name. Its going to take many more decades for Russia to ever be something more than a gas station with nukes. That's because of communism. Communism necrotizes societies. Communism kills government flexibility and functionality and it kills innovation (which is why, btw, China has to steal everyones technology as well.)

The government has to strike a balance between capitalism and regulation.

I see a lot of TIMs who claim to be communist and that has probably tainted my view of communists.

Understandable.

Originally, communism was both a theory of economics, society, and human development, as well a movement for the liberation of the proletariat (any person who sells his or her labor to survive).

As communism became a state philosophy, it was henceforth associated with the negative actions of these states, of which of course there are many. Though positives are usually ignored in bourgeois history writing. For example, the USSR in the 1920s was the world's most progressive country in terms of women's rights: women's suffrage, maternity leave and daycare centers, right to university education and employment for women, no-fault divorce, criminalization of marital rape, ... That's because feminists were active participants in the Russian revolution. They were later pushed out.

The Marxist critique of capitalism isn't that capitalism is the worst thing ever. Marx himself saw it as a higher stage of human development than feudalism, and acknowledged the benefits of industrialization that resulted from capitalism. Rather the critique is that capitalism has inherent contradictions that ultimately can only be solved by abolishing bourgeois property, i.e. the private ownership of the means of production, and this can only be accomplished through proletarian revolution (inspired by the exploitation of the proletariat under capitalism). In Marx and Engels' understanding (dialectical materialism), however, the positive aspects of capitalism would remain.

TIMs by definition aren't even really communist in the Marxist tradition because trans ideology is hyper-individualist and idealist in the philosophical sense (the material world being constructed by the ideas of humans, like "gender identity" determining your sex) whereas Marxism is materialist, i.e. the ideas of humans are shaped by their material conditions (like oppression of women by men based on the material reality of biological sex), which are in turn altered by collective human action (like class struggle).

I think TIMs only really call themselves communist because they want the state to provide free cosmetic surgery, but communism isn't (originally) defined by state power; it's defined by the abolition of bourgeois property. A communist society would have better use for medical resources (communally managed) than to provide genital mutilations, breast implants, hair transplants, and skull shavings for men with the deluded idea that they're women.

[–] banjo 5 points (+5|-0)

I see a lot of TIMs who claim to be communist and that has probably tainted my view of communists

Same as they do to gay rights, feminism, BLM...

[–] RadfemBlack 2 points (+2|-0)

I'm a libertarian socialist (anarcho-communist)

Based. I’m a SocDem for now but I’m interested in LibSoc.

[–] TiredDev 8 points (+8|-0)

That's great! I really do feel like you can assess how caring a boyfriend is based on his approach to women's rights. My boyfriend is definitely not perfect, but anything he really says or does that I consider sexist are really out of ignorance on how women think and what we generally want out of life. But when I actually take them time to explain women's issues to him, he respectfully listens and agrees that it's important. And now he's gotten to the point where he can be even more upset about TRAs than even I do. I really do think our best male allies are the ones who don't try to act like they're perfect, but will follow women's leads when it comes to addressing what problems our society has with our rights. I'm glad that your boyfriend is taking it a step further and trying to work on his peers, since that's probably the best way for a lot of men to consider a political stance.

[–] SamuraiGhostCat 7 points (+7|-0)

That’s awesome! Good job on peaking him. One by one, we will change minds.

I successfully peaked my husband, a childhood friend, and my mother. Even if they don't necessarily have the language to describe it, most people seem to be creeped out by AGP and know it when they see it.

I think CWC is going to peak an entirely new wave of people...

[–] Kcotter7 2 points (+2|-0)

My husband has been very vocal on Facebook about how wrong it is to have men in women’s sport.

He has been called transphobic a few times now.

I think I peaked him lol.

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