23

I actually do admire some TIMS and TIFS because they actually seem like they are really good people that are suffering from dysphoria; and I have zero problem with these people. I actually get kind of angry when TRAS spout that trans is beautiful, because after reading about what transgenderism really is and hearing about their life experiences; it is obvious that being trans freaking sucks, and it isn't just discrimination either. Why the would anyone want to actually feel like they were born in the wrong body? They should be relieved when someone decides they aren't trans, not praising them to high heavens for "discovering themselves" Being trans isn't fun or quirky; it used to be considered a mental illness because the person that is trans is suffering. Of course though when you point this out, you are a bad person because apparently you don't want people to get the help they need; you are just a right winger that wants to be miserable. I am not GC because I want people to suffer, I am GC because I honestly think indoctronating children into thinking they are the other gender; encouraging people to be trans and go on hormones and get surgeries and promoting misogynistic ideas that liking certain things means you are trans is horryfing. I am tired of people acting like no reasonable person could have pobjections to trans activism.

I actually do admire some TIMS and TIFS because they actually seem like they are really good people that are suffering from dysphoria; and I have zero problem with these people. I actually get kind of angry when TRAS spout that trans is beautiful, because after reading about what transgenderism really is and hearing about their life experiences; it is obvious that being trans freaking sucks, and it isn't just discrimination either. Why the would anyone want to actually feel like they were born in the wrong body? They should be relieved when someone decides they aren't trans, not praising them to high heavens for "discovering themselves" Being trans isn't fun or quirky; it used to be considered a mental illness because the person that is trans is suffering. Of course though when you point this out, you are a bad person because apparently you don't want people to get the help they need; you are just a right winger that wants to be miserable. I am not GC because I want people to suffer, I am GC because I honestly think indoctronating children into thinking they are the other gender; encouraging people to be trans and go on hormones and get surgeries and promoting misogynistic ideas that liking certain things means you are trans is horryfing. I am tired of people acting like no reasonable person could have pobjections to trans activism.

34 comments

[–] VeggieAnnie 33 points (+33|-0)

Yes, it can be very lonely to be GC. It is easier to go along with the crowd. I think when you feel shame or embarrassment it's good to remind yourself that is just a feeling, not a thought. It is a natural feeling in response to being made to feel "not one of us." You feel outside the crowd. You know, intellectually, you are correct, but feelings aren't intellectual. They are responses to social cues. So it's ok to have thoughts and feelings that conflict and are uncomfortable. And you can always turn to us on ovarit to find a circle of people who aren't crazy :-)

[–] LunarMoose 23 points (+23|-0) Edited

I used to live in a little neighborhood where everyone knew everyone else - if not directly by name, by face. We all knew some details of our neighbors.

One day I was sitting next to a mom in the park whose son was on top of the slide (he was about 8-ish) and wearing a pink cast.

She pointed out her son (I already knew him) and said: He's a lot more butch than he used to be (perhaps noting the cast).

And, in a way, he was. I also already knew that he had attended preschool in princess dresses. I also knew that the mother I was talking to was gay, she was raising him with her wife. You might even say she was a bit butch herself. He also had a father who remained in his life (he was also gay).

Over the years, they just sort of let him dress as he wanted - and do the activities that pleased him. He went to school and never changed his name. He may be gay - now - I have no idea. I do know he is not trans (and never was).

The last time I saw him he was 18 and in the park talking to a bunch of teens (his friends). He was wearing jeans and a t-shirt. He looked like any other teen boy.

I DO believe that some people experience 'dysphoria.' I don't believe that 'transitioning' is ever the right answer. Dress as you like, love who you like (ect). And do the same for your kids. But I stop at the artificial hormones, larping as the opposite sex. Can someone do that and be happy? Sure. But I don't think that's a good goal. I sometimes feel bad that I"m on the outside of this culture 'war' (outside the place I would usually be). But deep down - I know I'm right. Perhaps not for every single person. But what is happening now - it's just wrong.

[–] ProxyMusic 23 points (+23|-0)

OP, this isn't directed at you. It's just the general response I always have when I hear/read/encounter persons hand-wringing about how awful it is for people who experience unhappiness and discomfort about their sex and the sex stereotypes associated with their sex - which is what "gender dysphoria" is.

When people make a point of expressing sympathy for "good people that are suffering from (gender) dysphoria" I always wonder if they are equally focused on, and feel the same level of sympathy for, good people who are suffering due to other forms of mental and physical illnesses.

Millions of people suffer from serious physical conditions and diseases that are disabling and/or life-limiting, and which are extremely painful physically as well as emotionally, and which will cause them to die before their time, often horrifically. Millions of others have extreme mental illnesses such as crippling depression, anxiety, bipolar disorder, schizophrenia, PTSD and so on. Millions of people in the world have inherent intellectual deficits that seriously handicap them and limit their prospects in life. Millions of people on earth today are also suffering from grinding poverty, political oppression, war, famine and displacement.

So why are people "suffering from dysphoria" over their gender/sex in the well-off nations of the world today constantly singled out as so much more important, and deserving of so much more attention and sympathy, than all the other people on earth suffering for all sorts of other reasons?

What is it about people with "gender dysphoria" that has caused them to become the center of attention, concern and compassion in Western society today when most people show little thought and care for so many other groups of people who are suffering not just as much as the "gender dysphoric" - but who are actually suffering far more?

[–] GoodGoneGirl 5 points (+5|-0)

Because they’re men. Loud, whiny men who act like they are the most oppressed people in the world. They’re created this narrative and apparently some women buy into to it. We don’t afford this ridiculous level of concern to people with eating disorders (which is often compared to being trans). Or women who been raped. Or literally any other group of people. I am so done with it.

I....totally agree with you; and this is one of the many, many reasons I peaked. I wish there was more funding to help people that suffer from intellectual disablities, and severe mental and physical illnesses. It bugs me that there are people ot there that seem to think being able to change genders is literally the most important thing ever.

[–] Hollyhock 0 points (+0|-0)

I think because for many of them, especially AGPs, their pathologies are personality disorders, like borderline, antisocial, dependent, histronic, and narcissistic. Instead of working through treatment, a trans identity is a 'get out of therapy jail' card.

I am NOT a mental health professional, so feel free to flame me for this observation. I'm just basing it off anecdotes and observations of my own.

[–] PGTips4Lyfe 22 points (+22|-0)

I am a desister, don't be ashamed. Its a cult ideology, its not wrong to take a stance against it. You're not hating a person, you're hating a belief system.

[–] somegenerichandle 18 points (+19|-1)

Yeah. There are reasonable ones of there. I hope most of us come from similar places that we want the best for them. I have had mental health issues before, so i know how bad it is for me when someone goes along with rather than challenge my delusion.

[–] RawSienna 18 points (+18|-0)

None of this shit would be an issue at all if some opposite sex presenting people didn’t insist they really are the other sex and demand everyone play along. That is a huge overreach and a violation of women’s rights.

I think all of us here would be ok with “therapeutic cross dressing” or whatever it would be called rather than “TW are literally W”. No. Fuck that.

[–] Hollyhock 1 points (+1|-0)

Agreed.

And why the fuck aren't MEN being asked to be more accommodating, less violent and less assholish so TiMs who really just want to pee (suspect this is actually a small percentage of the whole) won't feel scared or out of place in male spaces?

[–] ProxyMusic 15 points (+15|-0)

I am not GC because I want people to suffer, I am GC because I honestly think indoctronating children into thinking they are the other gender; encouraging people to be trans and go on hormones and get surgeries and promoting misogynistic ideas that liking certain things means you are trans is horryfing. I am tired of people acting like no reasonable person could have pobjections to trans activism.

Maybe your feelings of shame and unease over your views because you define being "GC" as solely being a response to today's trans mania.

I am critical of the rigid, regressive sex stereotypes, sex roles and system of male supremacy and female second-class status that constitute "gender." I am critical of gender because it's inherently misogynistic, it limits the life options and self-esteem of female people, and it circumscribes and screws up many male people too. I've been gender critical in this way for more than 50 years, long before the current craze for transing kids and encouraging people to take cross-sex hormones and try to "become authentic" through cosmetic plastic surgeries, cosplay and LARPing 24/7.

Being gender critical used to go hand in hand with being feminist, advocating for the advancement and liberation of girls and women, being against child abuse, supporting gay and lesbian rights and equality, fairness and dignity for all persons who've been marginalized and mistreated, such as people with disabilities and of minority races, ethnicities and religions. No shame in any of that.

I think this is why I relate way me to second wave feminism the feminism of today. There has been a huge backlash toward people that criticise any sort of plastic surgery, and it really rubs me the wrong way. People having to get cosmetic surgeries in order to "be themselves" is patriarchy in action.

[–] bluestocking 15 points (+15|-0)

What is there to be ashamed about?

If you recognize things that are obvious and observable while others deny them, why should you feel bad? If you are aware of misogyny and how many things in society are based in it and perpetuate it, while others are blissfully unaware or deny it, why would you feel to blame?

Do you feel bad for recognizing that the earth is round, while others believe it's flat? Do you feel ashamed for thinking for yourself, instead of blindly going along with whatever seems popular at the moment?

[–] banjo 14 points (+15|-1)

Don't be ashamed. I'm more ashamed of the people I otherwise respect who are apparently willing to follow the gender insanity to places I would never have believed.

You said you're not trying to make trans people suffer and you're NOT making them suffer. It's not your fault the truth hurts sometimes.

[–] LOriginedumonde 9 points (+9|-0)

Doing the right thing has never been ‘cool’ or ‘in’ when it really matters and being GC can at times be very lonely. However, the fundamental truth is that gender ideology hurts people. It preys on vulnerable people and sets them up for failure by selling an unattainable lie that ends up destroying their health and wellbeing. It also allows people with nefarious motives to play with the rights of those vulnerable people for their own perverse desires.

Don’t ever feel ashamed for doing the right thing when no one else will. Just because something upsets someone doesn’t mean it’s wrong. Tough love is real and necessary.

[–] Hollyhock 9 points (+10|-1)

I'm here and I'm GC primarily to help a loved one who is a young TiM. I have hope he'll get over this, but he's not doing well at all and his mental health issues are getting worse, not better, now that he's gone on hormones. I am not the parent, but close enough to feel pain as he suffers. It is absolutely a cult which takes advantage of vulnerable kids - many on the spectrum and/or ADHD or with trauma and mental health pathologies. Trans ideology is a pied piper to these people and the kids grow up into messed up adults. I hate it so much and I feel no shame in being GC, despite what some of my leftist progressive peeps wish me to feel (yes, I'm very progressive in most other things).

The irony is, the more I know people who are trans, the more I see the damage of this ideology. I know of maybe one true transvestite who is older and thinks TiMs should not play women's sports. He seems happy with his surgeries, but he's the first person to say he has struggled with mental health issues his entire life. I don't know if he's AGP or really just dysphoric.

Out of the maybe 30ish people I know who are trans or NB or Gender fluid, I don't know a single one who isn't also suffering from some kind of mental health issue.

This is exactly why gatekeeping IS a good thing; and how trans people are actually harming their own group. Your loved one should be getting the help he needs instead of being told he needs hormones.

I too have noticed older trans people tend t o be more well adjusted; even though they also have lots of mental health problems as well.

[–] Hollyhock 0 points (+0|-0)

I believe Abigail Shrier noted she'd also found older trans people in her interviews who were happy with their choices and life. Her concerns were that there were too many girls too quickly falling into this.

Load more (9 comments)