I know quite a few women and men who identify as non-binary. The main thing they have in common is that when they're "expressing" their gender (and note: this is definitely an active performance they put on), it's always incredibly childlike.
They're also all mentally ill and autistic as an aside. (As am I, which is why I tend to run into these people a lot in support circles.)
They'll wear childlike clothing, cuddle stuffed toys, even their language seems to regress. The memes they share are always pastel-coloured children's cartoon-style things. It's such a stark contrast when you're around them in person and they suddenly have to go into normal adult mode to get something done and the mask slips. No more "just be kind"s and "uwu soft demigender enbie" babble when they're making phone calls or doing dishes or paying a bill.
Perfectly rational adults start acting like they're pre-pubescent children when it's time to play gender in front of people. It's so forced and creepy and there's always this weird horrible undercurrent because these are the same people who will send death threats to "TERFs."