I am of the firm belief that we should support them when they say they need privacy for their own dignity, and gay spaces in particular should not be invaded by TIFs. I give them my full, unwavering support.
But I want to point and laugh, first. Once I get it out of my system, I'll defend men's spaces, but not before. Give me a minute. Maybe ten. I want to post some mocking gifs and make smart ass remarks. I support you, men, gay and straight men. No no, I'm serious. This tea just went down the wrong tube. Excuse me for a minute.
Okay, I'm back.
You know what? I need to go pee, I'll be right back.
Okay, I'm back.
Now listen, it really is disgraceful the way TIFs are hounding gay men on dating apps, going to the few gay bars that are left, using men's bathrooms and change rooms. It's creepy, invasive, and disrespectful. I would argue dangerous for the TIFs, but the gentlest man in the world still shouldn't be forced to share space with a woman when he's trying to pee. He DEFINITELY shouldn't be forced to consider TIFs as dating partners, if he is gay. Not even if he is bi, honestly.
But it's really hard to hear men complain about this problem now, considering how they backed TIMs up invading our spaces. Gay men, as a class, called lesbians bigots for wanting to protect the few spaces they had. Lesbians never asked for much. Whose dream vacation destination is fucking Michigan? The bars were usually sparse and low-budget. But these bars and Michfest and all the rest of it meant the world to lesbians.
TIFs barely existed, and the few that were there were usually lesbians. So men, gay and straight, never really had to worry about women invading their spaces. Even now, they don't have to worry about their sports or prisons (most male prisoners were LOVE women to be locked up with them). Now TIFs are, rather stupidly, going into men's bathrooms. And they are quite brazenly going into gay men's spaces. This is simply horrible of them and I understand the anger gay men have.
But for all the men whining "YOU want YOUR spaces, why can't WE protect OURS?"
What spaces do we have left? Your sex class fought tooth and nail to not have women's public bathrooms or sports. Then you found ways to effectively abolish them. It didn't cross your mind that you might lose your spaces, because at the time TIFs didn't exist. I don't think lesbians should allocate half their efforts to regain their spaces to men, since they got very little backup as they were losing them. Straight women should respect men's spaces, and support the need for them, but not center it as the core issue. Because it's not even a third of what we've lost.
I don't want to hear "Trans women are women, but gay men's spaces are sacred.....and straight guys deserve their privacy."
I dunno; this is just bugging me today. It's not that I don't think men need their own spaces. They do. But it's hard to listen to them complain now, when I got puzzled stares and scolding for telling them what this was costing me, as a woman.