The other thread about Love Actually made me wonder what rom-coms are actually not dreadfully misogynistic. Let’s make a list of romantic films that are enjoyable.

The other thread about Love Actually made me wonder what rom-coms are actually not dreadfully misogynistic. Let’s make a list of romantic films that are enjoyable.


My favorites:

  • When Harry Met Sally: witty dialogue (thank you, Nora Ephron), both genuinely funny and moving, and Princess Leia (okay, Carrie Fisher, but she’s fabulous either way).
  • The Philadelphia Story: The Grant-Hepburn dialogue is evergreen
  • Strictly Ballroom: as visually gorgeous as it is moving.
  • Crossing Delancey: a little-known gem, that looks critically at the role of economic class in modern romantic relationships.
  • The Truth About Cats and Dogs: with Janeane Garofolo and Uma Thurman. It’s a genX rom-com that’s witty and affecting.
  • Go Fish: a wonderful lesbian love story, made at a time long before gender ideology became a thing.
  • Music and Lyrics: for some reason I really love this one, though I can’t stand Hugh Grant. But Drew Barrymore is wonderful.

And a couple of others that may be controversial from a feminist p.o.v. but I still love because I think they’re more complex than they may seem:

  • The Wedding Singer: Adam Sandler - I know, I know. But he and Drew Barrymore have genuine chemistry, and, well, I’m an ‘80s kid.
  • My Best Friend’s Wedding: only after it’s done did I realize that getting a traditionally happy ending may not be a necessarily good thing. And I adore Rupert Everett.

My absolute favorite part of When Harry Met Sally is when Fisher's and Kirby's characters ditch their dates with Harry and Sally respectively and go off together.


I also have a soft spot for the old people and their “how we met” clips.🥰

I second Crossing Delancey! I absolutely love that movie.

Right?? I can’t believe it’s not more popular! I can’t even find it to stream anywhere.😕

[–] immersang 2 points Edited

Agree on Music and Lyrics (although I always liked Hugh Grant as an actor anyway, and I love Drew Barrymore, so great combination for me) and My Best Friend’s Wedding (probably my all time favorite romcom - I enjoy Cameron Diaz in particular on every rewatch, she always had fantastic comedic timing - not to mention the “I say a little prayer for you” scene, of course).

How could I forget My Best Friend's Wedding?! I love that one especially because it doesn't have the expected rom-com ending.

It’s one of those movies that has me laughing constantly, even after all these years! Rupert Everett steals the show, and that helium-enhanced John Denver karaoke has no equal.🤣

Crazy Rich Asians



Wonderful sendup. Every character is over-the-top entitled, gorgeous, obnoxious, and funny as hell.

Even better, the young male lead is not a widower. It drives me bonkers how common this cheap, misogynist backstory is used in film & TV shows.

[–] GenZ-ProWoman 5 points Edited

I have def mentioned this on Ovarit before but I love Miss Congeniality. It’s more of a comedy with romantic elements dashed in as a side plot. Most of it is an FBI agent going undercover in a Miss USA pageant to root out a potential bombing threat. Super funny and has a wry take on beauty standards.

I second the vote for Return To Me which is a really sweet film with a twist.

27 Dresses with Katherine Heigl, Just Like Heaven with Mark Ruffalo and Reese Witherspoon, 13 Going On 30 with Mark Ruffalo and Jennifer Garner,

The recent Rebel Wilson film where she ends up in a musical wasn’t bad because it has an unexpected ending which I quite liked.

YES on the middle paragraph. I never could buy into that boy from the 80s growing up to be Mark Ruffalo lol

I will always have soft spots for Moonstruck, When Harry Met Sally and Pride and Prejudice (the Keira Knightly version) P&P especially is my comfort movie. I love that every time Lizzy is savage to Mr. Darcy or talks about something she likes, he steps his game up. I also love that her father doesn't force her to be in a marriage she doesn't want.

Edited because apparently my brain is wild today and I can't keep my Jane Austen works straight lol.

[–] vulvapeople 11 points Edited

That's Pride & Prejudice. Although I think Emma Thompson's Sense & Sensibility is also quite good.

I enjoyed S&S too!

Never watched Knightley’s P&P because nobody but Colin Firth can be Darcy as far as I’m concerned.

Damn it! I clearly have had too much or not enough coffee today LOL. Editing to correct. I do love Sense and Sensibility too though!

I watched Just Like Heaven recently with Reese Witherspoon and Mark Ruffalo and really enjoyed it!

[–] gluhbirne 4 points Edited

Return To Me!! Omg omg omg. Came across it randomly on cable one night and was instantly smitten. David Duchovny and Minnie Driver*, directed by the hilarious and perfect Bonnie Hunt. Very old fashioned and sweet.

*Rowling-supporting gendersane

I have been trying to remember the name of this movie, thank you!

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