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Strange, how the TRAs get all up in arms over a lesbian telling a straight woman (with whom she's friendly, while both are happily drunk) that she's only 66% straight, but are totally happy with males telling lesbians that they are required to like penis.

Double morals much?

Do these people not have friends? We make sexual jokes at each other constantly. It's only creepy when a man or a non-friend does it.

Playing into the "predatory lesbian" homophobia when you're a male "lesbian" is so laughable it wouldn't be out of place in an SNL skit.

[–] Tq231442 29 points Edited

I've never in my entire life had a lesbian harass me in any way, shape or form. Not saying it's impossible, but it's just never happened to me, and I spent a good few months in the lesbian scene when I was in a questioning-if-I'm-bi phase (PS, I know lesbians hate when straight women do that, I was 19 sorry :-( )

I get some form of harassment from a man at least every month lmao.

Keep coping

Yes! Personally, I have always been hyper conscious and a little wary of what I say around certain straight women for fear of them thinking I’m predatory. However, usually I’ve found actually straight women will flirt and kid around pretty openly with lesbians in ways they wouldn’t with men, probably because we don’t pose the same threat of violence and don’t feel entitled to other women’s bodies.

I have been hit on several times by lesbian women and part of it too is that they take rejection just fine. There is no giant mantrum and potential disaster. The last time it happened a lesbian woman asked if she could buy me a drink and mentioned she’d like to do more than that if I was up for it, with a saucy wink. I laughed and said I was flattered but not interested in that particular thing, and I bought her a drink. Then we drank and hung out together until the bar closed. She actually left before I did and when I went to close out my tab the bartender said the woman I’d been drinking with had paid it. She paid my bar tab long after I’d declined to sleep with her, she knew I was only in town for the one night. She just did it because it was nice and we had a nice time together. I don’t even let men buy me drinks because they want to pretend you owe them something when they do.

I have never rejected a man and had it just be a nice experience where we say “oh no worries, want to be friends anyway?” Why are men not capable of that? I really don’t get it.

I have never rejected a man and had it just be a nice experience where we say “oh no worries, want to be friends anyway?” Why are men not capable of that? I really don’t get it.

I've rejected both men and women and you're absolutely right. I've tried to be friends with males that I rejected and they never. Stop. Trying.

Meanwhile I'm a lesbian and I've rejected other women and guess what? We ended up being good friends, every single one. No sexualizing me, or constantly prodding me to see if I've changed my mind, etc. Women have NEVER demanded to know why I rejected them. Men always do.

I have never rejected a man and had it just be a nice experience where we say “oh no worries, want to be friends anyway?”

I've heard way too many stories where a man seems to do this, but in reality is just hanging around the woman hoping she eventually gives him 'a chance', then ending up bitter and angry because she doesn't. He never actually views her as 'just a friend'.

Such a great story :) Because to women other women are actual people, with their own thoughts, feelings, lives and agency, while to men women are 'resources'. It's been a huge learning experience for me to really understand to what extent this is actually true.

I know, actual lesbians are soooo terrified of making women uncomfortable because 100% of us have been sexually harassed by men at some point, and the thought of making someone else feel creeped out like that is horrifying. I honestly think many lesbians take it too far and are afraid to flirt or ask women out just in case they take it the wrong way, that's where the "useless lesbian" stereotype comes from. I'm friends with a good number of butch women, and they admit to going out of their way to be as respectful and cautious as possible so as not to be one more masculine person harassing or objectifying women. Of course AGPs don't know anything about lesbians or how women think and feel. AGPs just storm right in, make everyone uncomfortable with graphic sexual comments out of nowhere, and then blow up/threaten violence when they're politely turned down.

"OH no!! Rowling's lesbian friend told an obvious joke!! Thats the same as literal rape!!!" /s

If a straight man (like a TIM?) was saying this to a lesbian he would most likely be harassing her. If a lesbian jokingly says it to a friend while having lunch... I mean.

I love it when they really have no argument so they just grasp at straws. They just sound even more stupid.

I mean, why not pick up on the fact that she was trying to get them drunk? Amateurs.

That does bring up a good point, which it seems difficult for certain kinds of people to grasp. 'You're upset when I say x, but you don't mind when y says the same thing.' Yes, that's true. Y and I have a different relationship. Y is not threatening me. Y is not in a position of power over me. Y is not in a demographic that has historically oppressed and harmed me.

Right. I think it's worth noting that it's quite rare for straight women to have bad experiences with lesbians. And when we do, it's usually normal interpersonal issues, not sexual stuff.

It would be other way around, wouldn't it, lesbians having bad experience with homophobic women, especially if she's GNC.

And it's not even just comparing lesbians to straight men. Some of my male friends and colleagues are 'allowed' to say things to me that a male stranger, or even other men I know who I'm not so comfortable/familiar with, are not 'allowed' to say to me. The former might say something that I laugh at while the latter may say the same thing and set off serious alarm bells.

Oooh so true! They are just telling on themselves and their own projection

I hope Rowling is getting a lot of terfy love from followers. She probably needs it with all the BS.

JKR's banter with Julie Bindel is among the funniest things on the internet.

I love their friendship so much💜 (and....... I mean... sorry Rowling but now you have sown a dangerous seed in my mind. What kind of insanely wonderful power couple would that be, Rowling x Bindel? 👀)

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