[–] SaintHedwig 14 points Edited

Never merge bank accounts regardless of whether you're married or not. There's no reason to. If there are shared expenses, budget and spend from separate accounts accordingly, or, make a new joint account specifically for housing and groceries.

I learned this from my mother by both listening to and watching her as she dealt with her unemployed second husband.

EDIT: Also, prenups are just as valid for women as they are for men. If you plan to have kids and take time off from work in a way that will impact your career, and he promised to pick up the slack? Get that shit in writing.

You can also make a postnup in the event you didn't think about becoming a SAHM before getting married. And this applies to lesbians as well, some of the nastiest divorces I have seen have involved lesbian couples, although that is usually over child custody, child support issues.