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61 comments

This makes me sad. I honestly wish people who are this deep into gender-woo could get introduced to a new athletic and/or outdoorsy friend or group of friends. It would be so beneficial to go play frisbee, climb a mountain, visit Yellowstone, kayak the Everglades, take a surfing lesson - anything to stop the rumination. Better yet, a trip abroad - then they could see the diversity of the world and realize that a) most people don't care about your gender and b) the world is an incredible place with so much to do and see. Life doesn't have to be lived cowering under the weight of a dialogue box.

I think gender woo wouldn't be half as devastating if not for COVID. But people have spent so much time in isolation, bored and going crazy.

And then wearing a mask makes it harder to clock gender, and people are just losing thier minds.

The negative impact of social isolation is real and I don't contest it, but boredom is a choice and reflects a lack of hobbies/interests/connections. I wish they would work on those.

Yeah. Even if you don’t have a lot of money for crafts like knitting or crocheting or to sign up for an outdoor club, libraries offer free unlimited books. Even ebooks. Everywhere. You could just read, all the time.

This was my thought. Get outside. Actually do a thing. Create or accomplish something. Pick up a meaningful hobby that involves physically doing something like gardening, knitting, basket weaving, cooking, whatever. Go for long walks or hikes some place pretty. Travel. Play a physical game or sport with other people face-to-face. Experience life outside the narcotic haze of their gender ruminations.

I read this thread and decided I needed to get out of the house. Went to my local outdoor rink and I ended up skated for an hour and a half! These people need to do more of that. I feel much better.

[–] hmimperialtortie 🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈 6 points

I lashed out and did the vacuuming. My back’s killing me but I’m glad to have got it done. Now I just have to spend the rest of the day apologising to the kitties for terrorising them with the monster!

I think part of it for young people is that they grew up with screens and being on them all the time is their normal. I certainly also say they need a hobby and to get outside and touch some damn grass but I also think it's what society is now.

And apps, from social media to games are made to be addictive more than entertaining. And things like travelling and hobbies can be expensive. Most people can't just hop on a plane to Europe.

And a lot of these people are searching for meaning, there is less culture, art, religion, history in people's lives so they turn to something like gender to find their identity.

I definitely agree that screentime is much more of an issue now than ever before, but also? Excessive screentime is a choice. There are zillions of low-cost, accessible hobbies (crafting, walking, birding, you name it) and countless resources on the Internet to help people get started with reducing their low-value screentime. You don't have to hop on a plane to Europe to become an explorer in your own town or to visit a new park a few miles away. A BBQ at that park is a far better use of time than vegging on the couch binge-watching Netflix.

Also, thanks to screens and the Internet, we have better access to the world's best music, art, history, and information than ever before. I can literally do virtual museum tours without getting off my ass - and I have to think it would be a better choice than spending hours on Reddit obsessing over whether you're "perceived as female," etc. EVERYONE has agency to make better choices about how to spend their leisure time.

[–] hmimperialtortie 🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈 3 points

Yes, it’s not merely screen time, it’s what they choose to look at and read.

[–] notyourfetish 24 points Edited

They're cosplaying actual oppressed groups, and the fact that they think we're these whiny, fragile creatures who fall apart when our "identity" is questioned is beyond insulting.

If I had a meltdown everytime someone looked at me weird for wearing a bowtie, I'd have flung myself off a building years ago.

You CHOSE to cosplay us and be a bluehaired gender freak. Now suck it up and live with it!

These people are so ill and mentally fragile, and they're doing it to themselves. It's sick.

"I've come to understand my gender is like one of those soups that have been cooking for like, a hundred years. It's always the same soup, it's made up of multiple components interact with each other, and every now and then someone will add a new ingredient, and the whole thing changes."

That's called a personality and it's got fuckall to do with what's between your legs. How have these people completely lost the concept of personality?

[–] hmimperialtortie 🐈🐈🐈🐈🐈 5 points

Because that takes something between the ears and they’re seriously lacking in that department.

[–] crodish [OP] 22 points Edited

https://twitter.com/libsoftiktok/status/1498776345345597442

Full transcript:

I've known I'm trans for about three years, and I've come to understand my gender is like one of those soups that have been cooking for like, a hundred years. It's always the same soup, it's made up of multiple components interact with each other, and every now and then someone will add a new ingredient, and the whole thing changes.

I noticed a fluctuation this week when I was playing a game and I realized I was panicking. What happened was: new game, asks for my name, asks for my pronouns. And I've been using 'he/they' pronouns for about a year now. And they've been comfy. They've been great. And suddenly there's this pixel wordbot. And it says to me, "Are you sure your pronouns are 'he' and 'they'?"

And I'm looking at it, and I'm panicking, and something twinges in the back of my mind. Oh. I'm panicking about the pronouns. Suddenly, 'he' and 'they' are not the right pronouns anymore; something has changed, and this is how I'm finding out.

So then what? So then, you change. You find something new. It's that easy, and it's that hard.

In this case, the game had a bunch of neopronoun sets as well. So I picked one. Just 'zie/zir'. Just at random. I'm referred to in the game, and yeah, feels okay.

So then during the day, I mention this to my wife. And she says, "Oh, so my partner's experimenting with zir's pronouns?" And I felt this warmth in my chest of like, yeah, that's right. I'm not sure if it's a 100% right, but it fits. She is also now calling me 'zie/zir', which is adorable.

When I think about it though, I had been feeling like 'they/them' is very gender neutral, very no-gender, and I am gender-full, I feel gender, I'm like, gender chaotic, something like that. So it makes sense that I might wanna change.

NO IT JUST MEANS YOU NEED A FUCKING LIFE

YOU CAN ALSO RUIN SOUP BY ADDING IN THE WRONG INGREDIENT AND THE ENTIRE THING ENDS UP NEEDING TO BE THROWN OUT.

I ALSO CAN'T GET OVER THE FUCKING BABY 5 O'CLOCK SHADOW. IT LOOKS RIDICULOUS.

And I'm looking at it, and I'm panicking, and something twinges in the back of my mind. Oh. I'm panicking about the pronouns. Suddenly, 'he' and 'they' are not the right pronouns anymore; something has changed, and this is how I'm finding out.

But I thought gender was innate. I thought he/they was born being a he/they, now he/they tells me he/they was born a zie/zir????

So then during the day, I mention this to my wife. And she says, "Oh, so my partner's experimenting with zir's pronouns?" And I felt this warmth in my chest of like, yeah, that's right.

Oh that's just the thrill of controlling someone else's speech and thought patterns. When it wears off you'll need to change to cloud/cloudself/farts.

"Oh, so my partner's experimenting with zir's pronouns?"

If my husband referred to me in the third person to me (Is my wife making her dinner?), I would have some words for him, and if he did it a second time we probably wouldn't be together anymore. It comes off so patronizing and infantilizing, and that's gross

Can you blame her? If that was my marriage, I'd struggle to feign any respect for my partner too.

One of my biggest pet peeves. My parents used to do this constantly and it takes me from 0 to 200 in half a second.

My dad used to do it all the time. He was such a troll. He was such a troll that we didn't see the symptoms of his brain mets until way later than we should have, because we just assumed he was trolling. God, he used to say "my wife" all the time when speaking directly to my mother.

[–] Eava 29 points

No one calls you by your pronouns to your face. How often is someone present for a conversation where the speakers are using pronouns for someone who is with them?!

This is why the 'preferred pronoun' exercise is so masturbatory,

[–] bellatrixbells BoobatrixRex 6 points

Also what the fuck does "one of those soups that have been boiling for a hundred years" mean ?

Are there soups out there in the world that have been boiling for a hundred years ?? Like, they've been on a stove for decades ? Doesn't the broth go bad ? Doesn't it start tasting like shit after a few weeks ?

Who'd want soup that's been boiling for a hundred years ?

[+] [Deleted] 10 points

"zir's pronouns"? That's hilarious. They don't even know how those pronouns work. The correct form would be "zir pronouns".

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This is what happens when the mind has nothing to focus on but the self. These people really live a life with no threats, no risk. It is the epitome of privilege.

[–] n3847 12 points Edited

I am never confused. Mine are she/her because I'm a female.

If you're confused, that's a problem.

These people are mentally ill and need psychiatric help.

Liberals are molding the entire world around these people, think about that. Girlfrien can't handle being asked her own pronouns - something she probably demands and obsesses about daily.

[–] yikesforever 7 points Edited

If you aren't having freakouts about your pronouns you aren't oppressed. Gotta keep freaking out!

Like even if the game asks you your pronouns and confirms they are the right ones... freak out!

Is this the same TIF that screeched like a banshee and insisted she was a he/they like a minute ago on twitter? Or do they just all look the same...

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