Sometimes if they try to explain things to me in my field of expertise, I talk to them like they're children and say "yes, that's right, did you just learn that?" Gets the job done.

How about simply directing your attention elsewhere...and/or change the subject by talking over them?

[–] drdeeisback 4 points Edited

'I’ve noticed that a lot of men think arguing is like an endearing or funny behavior' Yeah I hate that--I have a lot of interest in learning things from people who know more than I do about something, but absolutely zero interest in arguing with someone, even if I'm 'right'/know more than they do; it's just not a pleasant way for me to spend my time. But it's clear there are lots of men who consider arguing entertainment, or an appropriate way to engage someone.

When faced with a mansplainer I sometimes just say 'I'm not interested in having a conversation with you about this.' I appreciate spaghettiforhair's point that once you've said something like this and they keep doing shit they have clearly and explicitly crossed a boundary you've set, and you can point that out to them and make them acknowledge it. 'But I just...' 'No. I said I wasn't interested.'

I run a discussion group about a particular topic, which is mostly of interest to women; maybe 80% of the groups are women-only, though the occasional man joins us once in a while. By and large although I prefer the women-only groups the men who come are actually fine; they're quiet and respectful and contribute appropriately. But the most recent group was joined by one of those guys who insists on taking up all the physical and conversational space--it was really wild to just watch him talk and talk (until I shut him up) and see how utterly uninterested he was in listening to or learning from anyone else there. (I didn't feel like I was in a position to exclude him from the group last time, but if he shows up again I'll see what excuse I can find to exclude him from now on.)

Check out some video's from Kasia Urbaniak and her "verbal self defense dojo"

I have mixed feelings on her, as she is a former dominatrix, which I dont hold against her (we all make bad decisions in our youth), but still talks about it in positive terms. That said, if you are the type of person who can get some good tips from someone you dont 100% agree with, she's got some good stuff on countering "good girl conditioning" and breaking the freeze response when men try to assume power over us.

Laugh, because they're a joke.

Yes, unironically. Just laughing at them can get under their skin so intensely sometimes. Especially if you mutter parts of what they just said and then laugh a bit more after saying it to yourself.

The key is to set clear verbal boundaries. If they know you won't take their shit, they're less likely to try.

For mansplaining, I cut them off and assertively tell them that I already know that and they don't need to explain it to me. If they keep pushing, they've violated a boundary, and I usually ask, "is there a problem?" They can never give me an answer lol, so that usually shuts them up.

For men who just decide that they need to argue with women all the time as some kind of "endearing" trait, I bluntly tell them that us arguing isn't productive and to leave me alone.

, "is there a problem?"

Bets part and something I regularly see men do with each other. You can't teach men shit because they already know, they just want to disrespect you. So you gotta be as "aggressive" as they are when maintaining your self respect. They don't expect you to be direct instead of complacent.

A disbelieving smile with lightly raised eyebrows is sure to irritate.