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I made a comment about this, but it just infuriates me how everyone is up in arms about women who choose to terminate a pregnancy.

These same people don't give two fucks about the women who WANT a pregnancy but it results in miscarriage or stillbirth (unless they can prosecute them for it somehow).

Most women have to have multiple miscarriages before they can be seen by a specialist to determine why it's happening. Personally, my first stillbirth was because of medical negligence, and my baby died because of it and I almost did too. This happens ALL THE TIME, WAY, WAY TOO OFTEN.

If they are so worried about saving fetuses, and pregnancies, can we please focus first on the ones women work actively to keep? Do those not matter to anyone? It's only the pregnancies women want or need to terminate that matter??

I made a comment about this, but it just infuriates me how everyone is up in arms about women who choose to terminate a pregnancy. These same people don't give two fucks about the women who WANT a pregnancy but it results in miscarriage or stillbirth (unless they can prosecute them for it somehow). Most women have to have multiple miscarriages before they can be seen by a specialist to determine why it's happening. Personally, my first stillbirth was because of medical negligence, and my baby died because of it and I almost did too. This happens ALL THE TIME, WAY, WAY TOO OFTEN. If they are so worried about saving fetuses, and pregnancies, can we please focus first on the ones women work actively to keep? Do those not matter to anyone? It's only the pregnancies women want or need to terminate that matter??

19 comments

[–] pennygadget 21 points

Amen sister.

Another note is how frustrating it is to see TRAs push for sci-fi bullshit like uterus transplants for dudes when pregnancy and maternal health is so under-studied. Pregnancy is the most common "condition" out there. Women get pregnant and give birth EVERY DAY. Every human on earth was born from a woman. And yet, we still haven't solved mysteries like how to ameliorate severe nausea so pregnant women with severe cases aren't starving and miserable. Or why some otherwise healthy women are prone to miscarriages while other women can push out multiple healthy babies regardless of their shitty lifestyle. Or why Black women have such a high rate of maternal complications/death compared to other groups of women. Etc...

When I was pregnant, I almost had to terminate a wanted pregnancy because my nausea was so bad I would vomit after drinking water. And the only drug that helped even a little cost $700 for a month supply. Luckily, I have Pharmacy education and was able to figure out a cheap OTC alternative to the expensive drug. But if I hadn't been knowledgeable enough about medications to cobble together an alternative, I may have been forced into an abortion to keep from literally starving to death.

If I hadn't been pro-choice before, my pregnancy would have made me pro-choice. I can't imagine forcing another woman to endure what I did for a baby she doesn't want and/or cannot afford to support
[–] VestalVirgin 1 points

Or why Black women have such a high rate of maternal complications/death compared to other groups of women.

Hasn't the reason for that already been found out to be racism in the health care system?

That's what I always considered to be the obvious reason.

US is one of the worse countries for maternal healthcare in general.

[–] pennygadget 0 points

IIRC, The numbers for Black women are the same in the UK as well. I'm not saying racism isn't a factor (I'm sure it is). But the fact that the problem is getting so little attention is a travesty

[–] OneryBox [OP] 6 points

I'm so sorry you went through this. And yes! Every time I hear about "womb transplants" it's such an eye roll. I got pre-eclampsia with my first pregnancy, the medical community has no idea why it happens, and it's most likely to happen with a first pregnancy for some reason, but they have no idea what actually causes it, or how to prevent it (baby aspirin only lowers odds by like 5% or something ridiculously low). Like, can we figure out pregnancy for actual women first??

[–] pennygadget 3 points

Like, can we figure out pregnancy for actual women first??

I know right! We still can't prevent/cure debilitating nausea or pre-eclampsia in regular pregnancies. But these Mengele doctors think they can sew a uterus into a man and grow a baby in there?
[–] GenderHeretic 23 points Edited

If they are so worried about saving fetuses, and pregnancies, can we please focus first on the ones women work actively to keep?

This is why I will never, ever call these people "pRo-LiFe". They don't give a fuck about the babies and pregnancies they claim to be crying over. There's no interest in improving maternal healthcare, not even reducing maternal mortality. Their interest in preventing miscarriage begins and ends with controlling women's every movement and pointing the finger at them for blame. The idea that this movement is about anything other than controlling and punishing women is such a lie.
[–] pennygadget 14 points

If they really wanted to save babies, they'd give pregnant women MORE choices and resources, not less.

[–] OneryBox [OP] 6 points

Definitely. I had a D&E after my second stillbirth, I could have been induced, but a D&E (in an OR at a hospital) was safer and emotionally easier. They don't realize a D&C and D&E are medical procedures that aren't solely for "killing fetuses", but are also used for miscarriages and stillbirths and women can become horribly ill or their wombs damaged without them.

[–] OneryBox [OP] 2 points

Yes, exactly this! There are even politicians who talk about "implanting ectopic pregnancies" which doesn't fucking exist, but please, pay for research to make this an actual procedure! (Just not a forced one). I've known women devestated by an ectopic pregnancy, as well as almost killed by them. Also, if we could actually implant eggs into the uterine wall it would be a drastic increase in WANTED pregnancies through IVF, etc. Only around 25% of fertilized eggs actually implant. Aren't they worried about all those "dead lives"? Eyeroll.

[–] danaseilhan 2 points

I would no more artificially increase the chances of a zygote implanting than I would help a baby snake or bird hatch from its egg. There's a pretty good chance that the ones that don't implant would have had something wrong with them anyway OR there's something up with the maternal environment that wouldn't be supportive of the pregnancy.
[–] Fluffy_gender 5 points

but please, pay for research to make this an actual procedure!

Not possible. You will interrupt the blood supply to the embryo and it will die no matter what.

[–] sohh 9 points

I have nothing intelligent to add since you and other commenters summed up the issue so well. We need to hold liberal and conservative politicians accountable so that more is invested in maternal healthcare.
[–] Elizabelch 5 points

It astonishes me how many of the same people who are so pro-life when it comes to abortion are also (US-specific) "but muh 2nd amendment" when it comes to keeping kids safe in schools and doing anything about school shootings.

Pro-life is virtue signaling. Once the virtue has been signaled, they don't care any more.
[–] OneryBox [OP] 3 points

Yeah, they are "pro-life" but pro-death penalty, anti-any sort of funding to help families and mothers actually care for the baby they wanted them to have. Just so much hypocrisy.

[+] [Deleted] 7 points
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