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Iceland's attitude when a young woman is kidnapped, raped and killed (which almost never happens there): "Today she is our sister, our daughter.... We don’t live in a society where we tolerate a 20-year-old woman being abducted in the night." https://www.theguardian.com/news/2018/apr/12/the-murder-that-shook-iceland

Our attitude: Sad, but why was she walking around at night by herself?

WHY is that our attitude? WHY do we accept that that's "just how it is"?

Iceland's attitude when a young woman is kidnapped, raped and killed (which almost never happens there): "Today she is our sister, our daughter.... **We don’t live in a society where we tolerate a 20-year-old woman being abducted in the night**." https://www.theguardian.com/news/2018/apr/12/the-murder-that-shook-iceland Our attitude: Sad, but why was she walking around at night by herself? WHY is that our attitude? WHY do we accept that that's "just how it is"?

8 comments

To quote "death of one is a tragedy, death of a million is a statistic"

It's so common for women to be victimised it's a statistic, and no one really seems to see that as a problem.

That's why when a male gets abused it gets so much attention and outrage, when it happens to a woman it's just another day.

[–] VestalVirgin 11 points Edited

Well, it might be due to Iceland's culture - Norse countries had more women's rights than Ancient Rome, and it might be that the Roman influence damaged societal attitudes ...

Or it might be due to Iceland being so small and sparsely populated. So it is easier for Icelandic people to consider her one of them. (Science says that it is pretty much impossible to personally know and care about more than roughly 300 people. Caring for people you don't personally know uses different brain pathways - but I suspect numbers still make a difference there, as the smaller the numbers, the more likely the murder victim was known to someone known to you.)

I haven't consumed enough Icelandic media to be able to tell if there is a difference, but that might prove useful. Media do a lot to drive societal attitudes. (Porn is, after all, a kind of media, too.)

[–] Killer_Danish 10 points Edited

It’s how we cope. Men will never change unless there are TRUE consequences for their vile actions. Our systems are broken. Without fixing them, things will never change. So, society blames women and moves on.

Edit: clarity

This is going to sound over-simplified, but there are only around 400000 Icelanders, they are a pretty homogeneous group and actually a lot of them are somewhat related. Also, since it seems to be a very safe country, they probably are less desensitized to violence.

men are the biggest sissies who need sooo much space on the street. they use violence such as this in order to justify taking up more street space. I wrote about this on my blog as well, also around the time when women received violence for being in the "male space"

You can’t change attitudes, you can only arm women.

The fact is we live in a world where, in an unarmed fight, any man could kill any woman. As long as that’s true, walking down a dark street late at night or being in any kind of isolated area will create the risk of a man killing a woman.

People don’t like the us and it’s guns but in terms of personal safety, there’s nothing safer than carrying a gun.

People don’t like the us and it’s guns but in terms of personal safety, there’s nothing safer than carrying a gun.

Ah, but do women get off scot-free after shooting rapists with guns?

That is the interesting question here.

Considering that I recall a case in Germany where a woman was punished for her dog biting a man who attacked her, I don't think guns really solve the problem.

I mean sure, a dead rapist is a net win, even if the hero who killed him goes to prison, but how many women will want to risk that?

While a gun might have saved this woman (possibly), guns do not solve the problem with rape. I am pretty sure the statistics for the US, too, say that most rapes are not stranger rapes but date rapes, and, well, you are unlikely to carry a gun with you when in bed with a man.

Sure, in the US it is easier to set up a women's country where you patrol the border with guns and shoot male invaders, but that's separatism, and I am pretty sure that separatism would prevent like 90% of rapes in other countries, too.

The problem isn't just that women can't fight men off, the problem is that women are punished for doing so, because we live in a patriarchy, and men just don't think rape is that bad.

In the Victorian age, men didn't go and rape noble ladies, but they sure did go around and raped the scullery maid. Why? Because the scullery maid could be fired for kneeing them in the balls, while molesting a noblewoman had dire consequences for any man of lower social status. The scullery maid was stronger and better able to fight back, but that didn't matter.

Well that depends on the race/class of the woman and the man involved. But yeah I take your point.