20

Yes, as severely as rape
Yes, but less severely than rape
No

25 comments

[–] Itzpapalotl 21 points Edited

It would be very very hard to prove.

I’ve been coerced into many things I didn’t want to do, I blame myself for not being stronger in several of those situations. It takes looking back, years later, thinking “that shouldn’t have happened, he shouldn’t have done that”

In one of those situations the man said “I could rape you” and I was terrified. We were alone, in an enclosed space, I was off my medication and not thinking straight (it was, I assume, very obvious I was extremely vulnerable and unstable). I did my best to de escalate the situation. He didn’t rape me but I did some things I wouldn’t have done if not threatened and afraid.

It’s taken years to even type that out. It’s a he said, she said situation. No evidence.

Even with actual rape, unless the rape is a particular kind of violent, there is little proof. Men know this. They have all the power.

All rape is basically like this, especially in the era of BDSM. “Innocent until proven guilty” means rape is decriminalized. The only way to know if something was rape is to ask the victim. And our male legal system doesn’t take “she said it was” as proof enough.

Yeah, this is why most women don’t report rape or sexual assault. Plus we tend to minimise things because male predatory behaviour is so normalised and just part of life for us.

I and each of my friends have many times been violated by men and shrugged it off. Reporting rape seems like more trauma and trouble that is unlikely to get you any justice anyway. It’s very depressing.