22

It's a little bit late for International Women's Day, but it slipped my mind that I'd planned to replace this post then. But I guess it's always International Women's Day at Ovarit!

We've all got a Peak Trans story, but this thread is more of a 'Peak Patriarchy' - a place to share your journey into feminism.

I'm particularly interested in answers to questions like:

  • What drew you towards feminism?
  • What have been your experiences the feminist movement?
  • How did you first encounter feminist thought? Books or blogs, youtubers or conversatisions with feminst friends?
  • Has your feminism changed over your life? For instance, were you a liberal feminist who radicalised?
  • What changes has becoming a feminist made to your life, your perspectives, your activism, your relationships, etc?
  • What are your priorities as a feminist?

(This is not a questionnaire or a test - these are just prompts to get you thinking.)

Looking forward to reading everyone's responses!

Earlier threads: [1], [2]

It's a little bit late for International Women's Day, but it slipped my mind that I'd planned to replace this post then. But I guess it's always International Women's Day at Ovarit! We've all got a [Peak Trans](https://www.ovarit.com/o/GenderCritical/13499/peak-trans-reprise-iii-tell-your-story-here) story, but this thread is more of a 'Peak Patriarchy' - a place to share your journey into feminism. I'm particularly interested in answers to questions like: - What drew you towards feminism? - What have been your experiences the feminist movement? - How did you first encounter feminist thought? Books or blogs, youtubers or conversatisions with feminst friends? - Has your feminism changed over your life? For instance, were you a liberal feminist who radicalised? - What changes has becoming a feminist made to your life, your perspectives, your activism, your relationships, etc? - What are your priorities as a feminist? (This is not a questionnaire or a test - these are just prompts to get you thinking.) Looking forward to reading everyone's responses! Earlier threads: [[1](https://www.ovarit.com/o/WomensLiberation/2493/how-did-you-become-a-feminist-tell-your-story)], [[2](https://www.ovarit.com/o/WomensLiberation/10146/how-did-you-become-a-feminist-tell-your-story-part-2)]

32 comments

[–] CatMage 1 points (+1|-0)

Growing up, I did not have any strong female role models. I was raised in a very traditional environment. My father likes to brag about how modern/progressive he is when in reality he does not allow my mom to make any major decisions and regularly ridicule her as stupid (even though she worked full-time and contributed to half the household expenses) while giving outsiders the impression of him as a mild-manner hen-pecked husband. My older brother had a violent temper and I was absolutely terrified of him but my parents looked the other way for his behavior because Only Male Child. My mother constantly berated me for not being feminine enough (not smiling enough, not being cheerful, being "selfish"/need to think about others first, being too "uppity, being too cold/unemotional, etc etc etc) while my brother got complete freedom to live his life as he wanted.

In college I ended up in a relationship with a very abusive man who constantly used gaslighting to get his way but coming from my sheltered background I had no idea that was a thing (they teach you about physical abuse in school but verbal/psychological is rarely mentioned). I put up with it for too many years because I was socialized to believe that I needed to be in a relationship, I shouldn't be so picky/have standards and that I needed to compromise for a successful relationship (when in reality I was doing all the compromising...). After that dumpsterfire of a relationship finally ended I took a really good look at the past events to fully understand how toxic the whole thing was and how easily it was to be victimized by a male who claimed to be marginalized/mistreated by society. (people who grew up in abusive households tend to normalize that behavior so they don't notice it in their later relationships)

My first exposure to feminist concepts was the book Failing At Fairness: How Our Schools Cheat Girls (Myra and David Sadker). It was quite an eyeopener and I think anyone going into the field of education should read it to ensure they are treating their students equally.

I don't have any major world-changing goals as a feminist. I primarily try to give my support to family and friends, especially those that seek advice and encourage them to seek happiness and not feel obligated to stay in unhappy/unhealthy relationships because of societal expectations of women. We are not required to start relationships with men just because they approached us. We do not have to start a family when the dating pool is so infested with trash. We do not owe men anything.

The older I get the more aware/intolerant I am of male entitlement that infects our society.