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DiscussionWhat's your dream project?
If you could make anything- money and time are not a limitation- what would it be?
What have you always wanted to make but haven't been able to get around to?
Is there a new skill you want to learn specifically to be able to make something?
I'm picking up needle felting mostly because I want to be able to make ornaments or cute little seasonal decorations.
I saw a Twitter post from a TIM once where he was crying about holding the door for a young man who then said "thank you sir" to him. So so so many comments like "fuck that guy" and "hope he burns in a fire" and whatever you know typical TRA stuff. But I thought it was absolutely wild that they had no problem referring to this person as "he", "him", "guy" whatever even though it was clear that pronouns weren't exchanged. Two men assumed each other were men. One man got mad about that and all of his friends understood this situation ... so bizarre.
There's many reasons I may hold the door open for someone, but when I do I don't expect anything in return. Not even a proper gendering.
Ha, that's genius. It's one of those things TRAs walk right into all the time, because there is no consistent logic within their little world.
This makes me think of my friend (well, not sure if we still are tbh) who works at Starbucks and is in every possible way an obvious woman. She's a mother to two adorable daughters, speaks and carries herself as one would expect a woman in her 20's to, and presents herself as very typically feminine on top of all that. But she decided last year to become a they/them "to reflect how [she] feels inside" and now she spends her time complaining on twitter that customers don't read her pronoun badge.
But if her reasoning for the pronoun change is that sometimes she "doesn't feel like a woman, or a man", then why on earth would random strangers be expected to follow along? Where in our lives do we expect a total stranger to anticipate and react to our feelings? This thinking makes absolutely no sense to me. It's so childish.
It's sad that if she feels un(er)valued, this is the only way she can redress the balance. Obviously working in such a place must be both tiring and demoralising. The work isn't interesting, and customers can be curt, rude, or off-hand, and she has to stay polite. Maybe she needs a different job—if she can get one.
I've done a lot of thinking about why she's become drawn to this stuff and I do think a lot of it has to do with an unsatisfying home and professional life. She's a bit of a job hopper and she keeps going back to SB because she says she ends up hating working anywhere else. Personally I wish she would go back to school and finish her degree now that her kids aren't babies anymore. Instead of growing up it seems like she's regressing. I want her to be happy, but I just can't understand or support the path she's decided to take.
Everybody’s going to be NB in the end, before they realize they are all just humans.
This is brilliant, this is how I'm gonna respond to these clowns irl from now on
I do not understand any "normie presenting" person who isn't wearing a giant pronoun notice being outraged if someone misgenders them. We're not psychic.
Reminds me of a time I went to a medieval martial arts gym to take a longsword class -- a lifelong dream of mine -- and the instructor was a female they/themmer. She had her hair in an elaborate braid that hung down to her butt. She wore tight yoga pants and tank tops that were clearly from the women's section and emphasized her female figure. And she was polyamorous, married to a man and dating another man (a fellow instructor at the gym actually).
She immediately clocked me as a fellow "queer" because I'm a butch lesbian with a classic #2 barber cut. And she kept hounding me about my pronouns.
When I told her I'm a lesbian and I consider it homophobic when people ask me about my pronouns or gender, she flipped SHIT and told me I was being transphobic and that she would kill to have people ask her for her pronouns because people look at her and just see a woman, how I'm so privileged to be able to complain about people asking me my pronouns. And then she went on a rant about how even trans people disrespect her because she's nondysphoric and not trans enough for them.
I wound up meeting with the owner to let him know I was withdrawing from class due to this instructor's behavior and homophobia. I explained very politely that I can't train in a combat sport where we are swinging wooden practice swords at each other if I can't trust my instructor to treat me with good faith and to have my safety as a priority when the instructor believes that I am some sort of transphobe.
The owner was actually super understanding, and gave me a refund, and moved me to another class with a different instructor. I wish I could've kept going there, but even with a different instructor, I found that the problem instructor was often around the gym, and was often in charge of proctoring the fight nights -- pairing people up and watching their sparring match as a sort of referee to keep people safe -- and that's just a dealbreaker for me. I don't want to be around this person who has appropriated the word queer for herself, whose privilege has allowed her to train for 7+ years in one of the most expensive martial arts known to man, who feels entitled to call me -- someone who was recently homeless -- privileged, who feels entitled to bully lesbians.
Anyway. Long tangent. But yeah. The people who do look super "normal" for their gender but who are radical nonbinaries are the WORST.
I'm sorry your dream experience got messed up by a self absorbed asshole. I'm pissed off for you
Reminds me of this brilliant piece https://twitter.com/TTExulansic/status/1647518235477278720
Every time a TIM posts an angry or whiny anecdote about a "cis woman" who is a complete stranger, I think, "How did you know she was a "cis" woman?" 🤔 They're always saying you can't tell!
I used to do this in TwoX (before I left Reddit entirely) every time they'd have a thread about 'cis men' doing something.
How do you know they're cis men? How can you tell they aren't "closeted" transwomen, or "butch" transwomen, or "masc-presenting" enbies?
Oops, it turns out you know exactly which class of people is shouting sexual harassment at you on the street! It turns out you know who is flashing their penises at you on the train!
And it turns out THEY know which class you belong to, despite having no idea what your internal sense of gender may be!
Golly gee lookit that!