When Kids Say They're Trans: A Guide for Parents (2023) by Lisa Marchiano, Stella O'Malley, and Sasha Ayad

I highly recommend this book, written by three gender critical women psychotherapists. The primary purpose of this book is to offer guidance to parents whose children identify as transgender, when the parents involved do not believe in social or medical transition and wish to encourage their children to accept themselves as they are.

The book includes an introduction to gender ideology talking points, scripts for how to broach certain topics with your child, tips for dealing with gender-affirming teachers and healthcare professionals, and strategies for self-care. I found particularly impactful the advice for managing conflict with your child and practical measures for deprogramming children including restricting internet access, reducing contact with RGOD friends, and sending the child to live with relatives. They also advise parents in the heartbreaking situation of seeing their child reach the age of consent and pursue a medical transition. They speak to the conflict of wanting to dissuade the child in the strongest possible terms from irreversible procedures, while fearing that a child will cut contact if they are perceived as too vehemently unsupportive.

The author's recommended techniques are drawn from a thorough understanding of the research, which they cite extensively. They reassure parents to trust their instincts when it comes to doing what's best for their children. Their experience really shows in their attention to detail. For example, they encourage children's freedom of expression in attire and gender presentation, but caution parents that a gender-nonconforming child may be attract the notice of TRA adults, including teachers, who may encourage them to adopt a trans identity. They detail the prevalence of autogynephilia among trans-identified young men and urge parents that even though it may be uncomfortable to consider this side of their son, it is very important to understand AGP's role in their son's gender identity. Overall I highly recommend this book, especially for any parents or anyone who works with children and adolescents.