Hi all, I was wondering if any of you who strength train may have some advice for this. I've been strength training on/off for many years now, maybe 6 months on to 6-12 months off. I know not great, but I always get discouraged as I never seem to make any progress. Mostly I've tried to do a modified 5x5 program - modified at half speed because I can't keep up with the typical recommended progression, and I can't do squats as my knee caps angle out and cause pain no matter the squat type or weight. I've had professional guidance to try to figure out the knee thing, doing progressively higher/heavier step-ups with the hope of building up to split squats and eventually real squats, and incorporating hip/glute strengthening exercises. But in the meantime have to slowly work around it.

I never seem to make much progress in the process. I mean I'll work out consistently 2-3x per week for 5 months and end at a 50 lbs bench press, 90 lbs deadlift, and 35 lbs overhead press. It's not like I'm starting with nothing either - I may start with 60 lbs for deadlifting and end at 90 lbs. The overhead press is the worst, it barely increases and I'm already failing reps.

I thought maybe I'm not eating enough - although I do take care to eat a lot more and protein-focused when working out - so I tried really counting calories and macros, but it made no difference on the last attempt and I started to hate eating from all the extra work the calculating and weighing and planning took. All the weight I gain seems to be fat, as I lose it almost immediately after I stop working out and eating extra.

The only thing I can think of is maybe I'm not pushing hard enough; I do aim for more like 6 reps per set, as I workout alone and sometimes worry about really pushing through to total failure. But that doesn't mean I don't try to go to failure, I do.

I want to start up again but on the right foot so I'm setting myself up for success. I was thinking of trying the Stronger by the Day program this time, with the hope it's better geared for women. But I'd greatly appreciate any advice from those of you who have figured it out. It's frustrating and discouraging to put in so much time and effort and still feel so weak.