I have kept a houseplant pretty much my entire life. I've historically treated their existence as something that is beneficial to me (they clean the air!) but their survival has always been a bit "Beyond Thunderdome."

Basically I parked em somewhere, drenched em when they looked parched and allowed the toughest gals to stick around instead of being hurled into backyard obscurity.

Then I got locked indoors.

Kinda made me reconsider my plant's view of the world.

Because of my previous attitude, I have a couple of what are probably considered "death proof" individuals that have survived a while with me - a snake plant, a spider plant and a devil's ivy.

I got interested in just what was making my otherwise healthy spider plant turn out black leaf tips, learned that she hates fluoride and stopped using tap water. Well! This worked so well that I got a little cocky and brought in some cut rate newbies.

I say all this to say I might have overestimated myself with the latest sprout of what I have repeatedly read is an "easy keeper."

Meet Phyllis.

http://imgur.com/gallery/HMd0SZm

This is, as far as I can tell, a stock model philodendron hederaceum.

Phyllis hails from the mean pots of a nice lady who let me take a rooted sprout from an undersunned plant. I brought her home just last weekend and she is sitting in a planter of African violet mix miracle grow (so fast draining I guess) with a drainage hole in the bottom I keep open with a small flat rock beneath the soil.

She gets north and west exposure in her little swing but as you can see, she is "spindly" and her leaves are small.

I have looked up and read everything I can think of for poor Phyllis but you know how the internet is nowadays - vague and full of advertisements.

Will Phyllis ever bulk up or is she doomed to scrawniness? I'm worried she's gonna grow so long it'll snap the spindly sprout from her roots and she'll plunge to her death.

This is my first philodendron and I'd like to see her beefy and strong like all those pictures I see online.

Phyllis would greatly appreciate your advice.

🐍 🕷 😈