Possibly an unpopular take, and open to have my opinion challenged

I'm fed up with people using comphet as a guise to justify their very heterosexual lifestyle.

Not to get into too much detail - but I'm not a goldstar. I was raised under very strict morals, and the constant pressure made me believe I was broken human being. When I was 20, I thought I could stomach men, and had a one-off experience that sent me to therapy afterwards. Realizing I'd rather die or be single for the rest of my life, rather than be forced into that situation again.

It took one disgusting evening to solidify what I already knew. And to this day, gives me a knee jerk reaction.

I've always seen that to be comphet, the strong push by society to be like the majority.

So I never understood why 'late bloomers, bi women and queers' have co-opted it under their own definition.

Late bloomers who still actively and willingly engage with men while also claiming lesbianism and comphet the reason as to why they're doing so?

Sorry, I ain't buying it. Unless you've been sanctioned by religious extremes, or had a gun thrust against your head - I don't see why any of these women would not choose just to be single. You willingly were intimate enough with a man to have 4 children. You decided to do that. So to flip the script and ssy you now choose to be a lesbian because comphet? Makes lesbianism nothing more than a glorified label to escape your now decaying heterosexual relationship.

And this isn't even including the multitude of 'late bloomers' who comment about using men for sexual gratification or hookups because lesbian dating is too slow or too hard.

Bisexual women baffle me. You're engaging both men and women, comphet doesn't apply since you already engage and embrace heterosexuality. In the briefest of understanding, I can somewhat see the difficulty of finding out about female attraction when you currently or only engage with males. But even then, instead of trying out a different venue..you just validate yourself in the sanctity of norms that are the polar opposite of comphet.

And since the current definition of bisexuality is more the notion rather than the act (ie - she watches lesbian porn, she has a crush, etc.) How can the concept of comphet reality really impact metaphorical experiences that you choose to never engage in?

TiMs - this one is obvious. If you're a transwomen hunting down women for partners. That's literally textbook heterosexuality. Not comphet, just het.

Queers - anyone who says they're queer, I automatically think spicy straight. I would bet a good chunk o' change that most people making these claims are straight. You can't make claims of comphet, when you're only or primarily het.

I'm looking for thoughts about this from other lesbians, as I'm getting tired of people and their justifications on their behaviour.

Perhaps I'm seeing this through a filtered lens.