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Daily(ish) questionDo you have / want kids?
51 votes
Hi all, these are our daily prompts to try to boost engagement. I’ll be posting a different prompt each day, alternating between in o/Lesbians and o/LovingWomen. I won’t be cross-posting, but if someone else wants to that’s fine. If you have your own ideas for questions, you can either post yourself and flair them ‘daily(ish) question’ or message a moderator to add it to the list. We are not too far from 1k subscribers in each circle, and I would love to see us hit that number - and get more of those users interacting.
So: Do you have / want kids?
As a dysphoric woman the whole pregnancy thing has always been literal alien-movie-level nightmare fuel for me, but on an ethical level I'd also never create a male. And bringing a girl into this hell world is a conundrum too. I've never felt this alleged biological urge to have a baby and I'm old enough they would call it a "geriatric pregnancy" if I for some idiot reason tried it now.
I don't want to deal with extremely expensive, screaming, demanding creatures 24/7 and the absolutely endless drudgery that it entails. I was mini-mom for many younger siblings and cousins and now I love for example being able to leave the house on a whim, staying up reading, not being woken up by screeching, etc.
If, obviously impossible hypothetical, you could know which kids in foster care were gay, I'd want to see lesbians adopting those girls, especially the older ones that get overlooked, and raising them on women's land and I wouldn't be against helping out with them on such a commune.
But in reality where you most likely would have a straight kid, even though women's land is pretty much the only place I could take a girl child and feel she would be safe, I couldn't bear to adopt and get attached to a daughter while knowing the extremely high likelihood she would abandon us all and throw away everything we would try to teach her so she can devote her life to some worthless male who will mistreat and devalue her and her daughters. It's too depressing to think about.
women's land is pretty much the only place I could take a girl child and feel she would be safe
uh yup
devote her life to some worthless male who will mistreat and devalue her and her daughters. It's too depressing to think about.
Yes this is another reason to not have a daughter (which is the only child I'd consent to having if I actually wanted to have one).
Yeah, I feel that. I hear lesbian girls are over represented in foster care though, so that may not be a complete pipe dream!
I don’t want kids, never have and never will. Nothing about this world makes me want to have them. There’s so much awfulness at every turn plus kids are incredibly expensive in every way: time-wise, energy-wise, money-wise, mental-soundness-wise etc.
Where are all the women that don’t want kids hiding?
I swear whenever I was in the dating pool, I would always end up finding women that say they want kids further down the line, and that’s such a deal breaker. You can’t comprise on that successfully. If she truly has the yearning urge to have a kid, and you don’t, the relationship won’t last long because she’s gonna end up building resentment towards you. That’s not fair to her or to me, and that’s such a sad way of going into a relationship.
No, I wouldn't want a son and I also wouldn't want to subject a daughter to this cruel, misogynistic world.
I tell myself this all the time. I would haaaaaaate to have a son. Like what do you want? STFU 🙄
Realizing now that I should have added an 'unsure' option - sorry!
Never. I would not suffer a relationship with a male that may kill me. I would not bring a girl into this patriarchal dystopia. I would not subject a life to the grim environmental future. I have better things to do with my time, like travel, enjoy nature, read, enjoy peace, and quiet, and live a comfortable life.
I wanted children very badly, enough to put up with a man long enough to get them. I cherish my amazing daughters. I also constantly fear for them in an all encompassing soul crushing anxiety. For me, having children was willingly walking into this life of fear knowing it would destroy me if anything ever hurt them. I don't regret it, but I hope my girls never choose to have children and just live for themselves. There's enough to be fearful of already.
I don’t want kids and neither does my partner. That said, I would step up if my nieces and nephews were suddenly orphaned. I have never wanted to be pregnant and raise a baby. I do enjoy spending time with my nieces and nephews, but I like going home to our dog and cats. Thankfully, family doesn’t pressure us in any way.
Misread a post here, whoops.
To the smaller percentage of lesbians that do want kids here, I’ll repost what I said in error to a comment here. You’ll find someone but don’t waste time trying to change someone’s mind. You’ll never give up wanting kids and they probably won’t change their mind. Don’t waste your time and break your heart by envisioning a life and family you can’t have.
I love kids but don’t want my own. I’m happy to play a support role of any of my siblings/close friends have children. If I change my mind someday I’ll want to adopt- zero interest in pregnancy