Woke homophobia from friends/acquaintances

ventWoke homophobia from friends/acquaintances

Posted May 12, 2023 by stern-as-steel in LovingWomen

Recently a friend of mine met my partner for the first time. It was a loud group setting so there wasn't much of a formal introduction, and when my partner went to the bathroom, this friend came over and asked me if that was my partner.

I said yes.

And she says: "What are their pronouns?""

I'll admit it, I was drunk. Even if I hadn't been, I think it would have taken me totally off-guard. I stared at her for an awkwardly long time and the only thing I could manage to say was "Uhh...she's a woman" in a tone of obviously, you moron.

She picked up on this tone and said "You never know, you know" in this condescending, patronizing tone.

I love the implication, from a straight person, that a woman literally in a same sex relationship is either a) ignorant of stuff going on in the 'community', or b) a bigot. This has happened to me before. I've been called homophobic by multiple straight people (all of whom are mutuals of both me AND my partner, so it's not as if they don't know!).

And it's just absurd. People don't seem to recognize same-sex attracted women as being same-sex attracted. To them, the LGBTQ+ consists of three groups of people: gay men, genderspecials, and...bigots. Lesbians are not even registered as homosexuals. A lesbian relationship is not a homosexual relationship.

No comments

Posted May 12, 2023 by stern-as-steel

Score: 39

/o/LovingWomen

988 subscribers

Created December 7, 2020

o/LovingWomen is a space for women who love, are attracted to, and engage in relationships with other women to connect, thrive, and build genuine community in solidarity with one another.

Along with our rules, you must follow Ovarit’s sitewide rules and guidelines. Circle rules, sitewide rules, and sitewide guidelines will all be enforced by the moderators.

No participation by people who are not both female and same sex attracted (biological woman attracted to biological women). Users in violation will be banned. This includes posting, commenting, and voting.
The purpose of this circle is solidarity with one another on the basis of our shared same-sex attraction. It is meant to be a place of unity, understanding, compassion, learning, and, most of all, solidarity. Overgeneralizations about women of another sexuality do not promote solidarity. Generalized statements such as ‘lesbians always do x’ or ‘all bisexuals think y’ are not acceptable. Please refrain from treating groups of women as monoliths or otherwise employing divisive rhetoric. Also refrain from unfounded speculation regarding the sex lives and sexuality of other women.
This circle is a female-focused space. As such, there is to be no discussion of attraction to men. I know that we currently have no o/BisexualWomen, but this circle is NOT a catchall for bisexual posts until that happens. Those posts belong in o/Women. This is still a circle for same-sex attracted women to talk about their same-sex attraction, and will remain so.
Assume good faith. Please refrain from being preemptively belligerent or defensive.
No criticism of sexual boundaries.
No slurs or pejoratives. Insults, name calling, ad hominem attacks, and other language used specifically to target another user will not be tolerated. Do not use the words 'cis' or 'cisgender' to refer to other women.
No brigading or vote manipulation.
No pornography. NSFW content can be posted, but posts must be marked NSFW.
Gender-critical or trans-critical content must be focused on relationships with women/attraction to women.
No derailing or hijacking. This refers to posting a comment that is unrelated to the topic of the post, which often kills the original discussion.
No attacks, insults, or reciprocation. If you are attacked by another user, use the report button instead of reciprocating. If you reciprocate, you will also be in violation of this rule.
No selfies, spam, or self promotion.

Moderators

stern-as-steel