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questionAdvice for getting over bisexual/bicurious roommate
I'm a lesbian in my 20s. I recently got a new roommate who is also in her 20s. She came from a fairly conservative country (no same sex marriage). She has a boyfriend back home and she's here in my country for a year.
She said a lot of things to me. She said she does not consider herself 100% straight and has been attracted to women before. She said she hates men. She said does not like p*nis that much and does not know how to feel about vaginas because she's never tried. She said she does not see herself ever settling down. She said she has lesbian and gay friends from back home and abroad.
I did tell her I am a lesbian about halfway through our knowing one another. I did that because I thought she was making passes at me and I wanted to curb the behavior (she would compare me to her boyfriend and she told me she would be open to cheating). Based on her response to my coming out, it seemed like she had no such intentions with me. From the looks of it, she's just here for a year to take a break from work and to "find herself". Originally she said she hated her job and would not be opposed to staying, but recently she has talked about going back. She said it's easy to tell me these things because she knows she'll leave and we'll probably never talk again, which sort of breaks my heart.
I know there is a lot of red flags in all of that. I wish I didn't like her. Does anyone have any tips on how to get over this situation? I would rather not move out because I have a relatively affordable room and recently the rent in this city has really gone up a lot. I was previously friendly towards her so now it would seem awkward to start avoiding her without any reason. I have not told her my feelings, I don't want to complicate this situation. She's going to be here for another 7 months. It's frustrating because there is a stupid and relentless part of me that wishes somehow things will work out, even though objectively I know it won't.
I'm asking here because all of my friends are tired of hearing about this. Everyone says I should stop spending time with her. It's hard because she's my roommate and it's not as if she has been unkind. Thank you for reading and any advice would be appreciated.
Fantastic! Wonderful! Thank you!
Although this may trigger a pile-on, I would like to ask those who don't want their posts to be included in the archives to reconsider, if those requests stand in the way of archiving Ovarit. Here's why:
Ovarit is a valuable part of feminist history and we want it to be available online forever.
We all posted here, under handles that we chose, and let our posts sit here on a website that anyone in the world could see for years and years. Why would we backtrack on that decision now? What's the difference between the world seeing your post on ovarit.com or seeing it on ovarit-archive.com?
If you really, truly don't want your posts visible on ovarit-archive.com, you still have a month to go back through the site and delete them all. Please do not place that burden on someone else's shoulders.
But if the archive's 90% complete, it's too late?
Yeah I'm just gonna have to rerun a lot of it to make sure any deletions are not included.