They don't get over a bruised ego more like.

I don't know if it's really heartbreak as much as outrage or humiliation sometimes. A guy I know was with someone for a single month, declared love and planned out a whole future with her that included her being a housewife and having a bunch of kids (basically he wanted a tradwife). When she dumped him for being creepy, useless, and not even having worked his first job at the age of 26, he had a full breakdown and kept repeating how she had used him. From what I gather they had gotten together when she was depressed/vulnerable but managed to get out of that relationship before she was in too deep.

Over a year later and he was still going on about how he will never date a "broken girl" again and how he was totally over her and had improved his life. It wasnt until he latched onto a new victim that he stopped with the overt bitterness over the ex. Except he still can't help making snide comments from time to time and comparing the two women.

Yeah I find this to be way too common. “The one that got away” is a phrase men use for a reason. Although it’s usually a case of he sucked and drove her away. At the very least, they don’t try to understand the reasons why the breakup happened. Then they refuse to ever process their feelings, accept that they weren’t right for each other, and move on and instead drag it all into the next relationship.

I patently refuse to get involved with men that are any type of caught up on an ex. Not my problem, BYE.

I honestly think a lot of men are ignorant to their own emotions. They’re never taught to process them, the same as how they are never taught to process things like rejection.

And then they turn around and think that they somehow “love harder” and “fall harder” than women do, because it’s the first time they’ve been able to fully feel and process an emotion other than desire or anger.

I've experienced men who clearly aren't over the ex, and I've experienced ones who get over a relationship surprisingly quickly. Like . . . shockingly quickly. Like they weren't that invested in their relationship and it's easy to get a new partner/wife.

I suspect for the first it's due to bruised egos, and the second is not really caring for their partner in the first place.

It's called triangulation. Men are not like us and they do not experience heartbreak, only injured egos. They will pretend to have been devastated by an old flame but it isn't true. It's just an excuse for him to make you feel inadequate and keep him from committing. Also, online relationships are not real.

I think psychos fit this pattern of behaviour.

Normal, mentally healthy men eventually move on.

He's not attached to her; he wants you to do the pick me dance!

Hey there. So I‘ve noticed this as well. I once talked to a guy who repeatedly talked about his ex. I asked him, whether he still wasn’t over her, but he insisted that he was. But I didn’t believe it. I guess it’s more difficult for men to be vulnerable and open up to just anyone. It’s not really something that guys do with each other, since it’s seen as a weakness. So once they find someone they truly connect with and openly talk to, it’s special to them since it’s not something they‘re used to. Women are more in touch with theit emotion, since it’s socially acceptable. Which is why it’s easier for us to move on, I believe. We talk, we cry and we process our experiences better. Men often don’t have that outlet. That’s what I believe.

No no no, you’ve framed this all wrong. It’s not that men have no EQ and are immature babies who never grow up or learn to have their own lives. It’s that women [checks notes] can’t “pair bond.” /s

Bill Maher has a podcast. Over the years, he has talked about a girlfriend in high school who dumped him, and he never got over being dumped by her. Recently, I saw a podcast where he said the reason he was so devastated by the break-up was because his Ego couldn't take it. I think he is right. A lot of it is that it is a blow to a man's ego. Women are not as ego driven.