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Spoiler"Better Things" and the gender woo
edit: for some reasons the spoiler censoring thingy doesn't seem to be working (at least not for me) so watch out, most of the text contains spoilers.
Better Things is about Sam (Pamela Adlon, who created the show with Louis CK), an actress pushing 50, raising her three daughters alone. I just finished watching it, and overall I found it entertaining, and interesting. I like that all of the central characters are women. There's a lot of female friendships, women talking about motherhood, marriage, divorce, careers, menopause, about growing up, and so on. It is on the libfem side, but I guess it's a reflection of the times.
Sam's middle daughter, Frankie, is GNC, and from the beginning I feared that they'd eventually trans her, simply for being GNC. In the end of the first season, Frankie is caught using the boys' bathroom at school and Sam is called. Later Frankie explains that she was just grossed out about the behaviour of some girls (which I think sounds like sexual assault from what she described), and she says "people will say it's because I'm a boy, but I'm not". What a relief! For a couple of minutes, because later the eldest states "Frankie is a boy", as if it were really obvious. Which she will later on completely deny having ever said, because as the show goes on, Frankie does not transition. Instead she becomes a they/them non binary, even though there's nothing unfeminine about her. Sure, she starts wearing suits, but so did Marlene Dietrich.
Frankie is the worst! She is insufferable, and so arrogant lecturing adults about politics! She's also completely disrespectful towards her mother, and very self centered. I know teenagers do that, but Frankie takes it to another level. At some point she runs away from home, and no explanation why she needed so much to be away is ever given. She just sort of disappears, and it seems she's been imposing herself at friends' houses, expecting adults other than her family members to take care of her. Sure she's smart and independent in many ways, but I don't think it's made clear in the show how dangerous a situation like this could be in real life. In the show she's staying with friends, but in real life I doubt that many people would house a brat just because of her teen angst, and a child with that level of arrogance could easily be groomed and abused by some adult taking advantage of a girl who thinks she can just leave home at 13.
At the same time, this white "non-girl" who thinks Easter traditions are offensive (because fertility symbols?) has absolutely no problem having a quiceañera. A rite of passage that is not her heritage, and it's exclusive for girls, which she claims she isn't. Her reasoning is that California is originally Mexican land, and her having a quinceañera is "appreciation" and not appropriation. Appreciation, it seems, of a tradition that means introducing the girl to the community as a woman who's ready to get married. But sure, it's not problematic because it's not white, I guess.
Everyone is very supportive of Frankie's gender identity in the show, including Sam, but it's an afterthought. No one makes a big deal out of it, they are more like "whatever". Sam is in fact a very permissive mother (sometimes too much IMO) and gives plenty of space for her daughters to express themselves. I don't think the plot was written to make identity politics or liberal politics look good. I think it was written to look like is a trend amongst bored teenagers. Max, the eldest daughter, matures over the seasons, specially towards the end, and Sam's mother, who Sam considered putting in a home at some point, also moves on, and I feel like the message is that it's all phases, including Frankie's gender identity. She'll grow out of it.
I'd say it's overall a good show, because despite the liberal politics I enjoyed watching it. Has anyone seen it? What did you think?
Why does everyone insist that girls should have NO PRIVACY whatsoever? This is a human rights violation on multiple levels.
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Even in my 40s, I hid a tampon and shield when I headed to the bathroom. I wasn't about to let anyone know.
Oh yes, being seen using the Menstruation Closet with the giant arrow pointing out their private bodily functions is definitely going to make girls more comfortable.
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And put TV screens outside that play the blood scenes from Carrie and The Shining on a loop
You really should be getting paid for great ideas like this
Don't forget the megaphone with someone announcing it so everyone across campus can hear about it
Ugh. This is vile.
What if all the girls just pretended to have their periods all the time? Then they would have a de facto women’s room 24/7, it’s not like school officials could check
it’s not like school officials could check
They might start checking if the TIMs complain about the women's room becoming a sausage fest
Yeah. Pantie checks. Only bad when you're checking for a penis. Totes okay when checking for menstruation.
They might even authorize teachers to poke around in girls' vaginas to look for tampons.
After all, it is in service of the sacred trans!
Hmm… it seems like there used to be a word for the category for menstruating people. We should ask JK Rowling if she knows what it was, she’s smart.
how the hell is a door with a big paper bloody pad on it and a huge-ass sign advertising it as the period bathroom supposed to make students any less uncomfortable?!
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I’m going to guess someone not born a woman thought this was great
Yeah, there is NO WAY an actual female said, "Young women will LOVE going into a toilet with bloody pad/tampon/cup imagery all over the door! Girls LOVE it when everyone knows they're bleeding out their vag!!!"
I wouldn't make the assumption it was a mans idea, handmaidens are brainwashed to be equally misogynist
I was just gonna say, I could see a handmaiden doing this to passive aggressively punish the girls who complained about sharing bathrooms
The fact that the girls had to have an excuse like their period to not wanna share a bathroom with boys. At these ages, normal boys wouldn't wanna share a bathroom with girls, either. Only depraved, degenerate little scumbags would be ok with sharing a bathroom with girls
Or…buckle up, cuz this is a radical idea…people with penises (aka boys) can stay out of the girl’s restroom…
Crazy, I know!
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It’s astounding this is all seen as “progressive”. We have regressed so much
I read about.a school in the usa that said girls could use the nurses toilet if they didn't want to use the coed ones. So many girls opted for this the line got too long and they started to miss class.
The school tired to give the girls demerits for getting back to class late.
All the girls should use this bathroom regardless of their period rather then the coed ones.
They could've had this for the TIMs, but they'd rather push girls out of their own space. I'll bet those girls love having everyone know they're menstruating....
Its because the TIMs would never be happy with their own space. They're only happy when they're taking away the women's space.
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Do they also get to skip science class, especially biology? Biology textbooks are SUPER terfy
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Girls must learn to accept discomfort to accommodate male feelings; its part of becoming a woman.
Right, because no pervert will ever go in there.
Probably a whole line of trans perverts waiting inside to hand out tampons.
Or collect bloody pads and tampons from the trash bins.
Oh my god, I read that some tims will fish dirty pads out of public bathrooms to pretend they have their period
Ugh. So women will have to run a gauntlet of TIMs with tampons in their purse in order to use the "menstruator" toilets.
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So a female restroom but make it as embarrassing and uncomfortable as possible? Wow thanks, you absolute fucking walnuts
Imagine going in there and being confronted by Dylan Mulvaney waving a box of tampons and asking if you would like one!
There was a discussion on Twitter that maybe the girls did it themselves... took back a single unisex bathroom (like one or two stalls?) and marked it in a way that boys would not want to enter. Not talking about TIMs of course, won't they make a beeline for it?
Oh cool the girls absolutely will not face additional harassment for this.
I have a better solution. How about they start letting girls pin scarlet stars on their chests to signify to everyone that they’re on their period? That way they can use the restrooms alone?
Did they somehow not realize that part of the problem was having the boys know they were menstruating?!
That idea was certainly cooked up in a man's head.
Either that, or an adult woman who doesn't give a shit about men knowing when she has her period sneaked it in to give the girls a girl only toilet back, thinking it better than nothing.
I've never given a shit about boys knowing that I menstruate, and I'd be using the menstruator toilet all the time, claiming a gynecological condition if anyone asks. "Yes, I know, I'm using it all the time, but I have my period all the time. There's like two days a month where I don't have it, and that's on the weekends. Poor me."
Or no, wait. I'd sometimes sneak into the non-menstruator toilet to throw a tampon in the toilet bowl. Without flushing. Just let it float there to creep out the boys, lol.
TIMs already claim that their hormone induced tummy aches and diarrhea are actually a period. So they'll colonize this space, too. Its not about validation. It's about making sure women don't have ANYTHING to themselves
On a related note, does anyone know of any charities that work toward improving the conditions of menstrual huts? (Yes, I know it would be best to eliminate the practice entirely, but that takes time and doesn’t help women presently.) One that addresses women as women and not menstruators, because I’ve found one like that.
The only way to improve them is to have armed female guards outside every one, all the time
This is absolutely vile and insane. I feel so bad for girls growing up now. I’m older gen z and it was horrible enough without all of this shit
As a preteen/teen I would’ve hated this, but as an adult, it looks like a sly way of having the women’s room back.
They don't make the boys move or change they make the girls move and change. This is male privilege. The only people benefiting here are males. That's the entire crux of the trans rights movement.
I'm worried some version of this will come to the United States and make it real easy to identify who's possibly pregnant.
At first I thought "lol, no, pregnant girls will just go to the period bathroom, obviously" but with the sorry state of sex ed in the US, they'll probably not even know what missing their period could mean, so ... yeah, you're right.
Is this real? Looks like they’re taking the piss, some sort of misogynistic incel joke. TRAs are disconnected from reality and are harmful to women and girls. Period.
WTF is wrong with these people, gaslighting misogynists, where has all the sanity gone.
Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME
I am in a rage about this. It cannot be real. They would not humiliate the girls like this
I get that period stigma needs to go away, but this isn't the way. Little girls just learning to navigate their periods should not have to advertise to a bunch of asshole boys that they're menstruating.
Woohoo! Watch out Tranada, here comes Spain without the S, crawling on the floor licking male shoes! 🇪🇦🇪🇦🇪🇦
Nothing to take your discomfort around your period as a school girl like walking into a single stall adorned with giant menstrual product decor and the name “Menstruants” on the door…
Hey, sounds like a way to get a women only restroom.
I tried to get TRAs to agree to a women only restroom by suggesting that they allow an extra terf bathroom, cause they don't wanna share a space with those nasty terfs, right?
Many were in favour. So, they are okay with allowing women to have their own spaces as long as they can shame women to hell for it.
(And also use who goes into that bathroom as indicator for who they are allowed to harrass. And ... eh, let's not pretend, TIMs will invade this, too.)
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I guarantee girls will use this one all the time to help obfuscate who is and isn't bleeding
I bet the main reason that they decided to have a dedicated menstruation toilet was for the comfort of boys, who perhaps felt a bit squeamish about smears of blood, on the sanitary bin for instance.
I bet you're correct. We all know they don't give a fuck about women's comfort
Hmm ...
I will add this to my list of things to do to businesses that got rid of their womens' toilets.
Anyone know a good recipe for fake blood?
Would be a pity to only be able to do it when I have my period.
corn syrup + cocoa powder + red food colouring = pretty good blood substitute. I bet it would fool men.
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The bloody pad has wings FFS!!
Cause it was made by a man whose seen commercials “now with wings!” But has never used the product
Oh my god, you're right
Are we TOTALLY sure this isn't a really tasteless and unfunny joke or prank
I just really don't want this to be real
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I know I would. This is basically just a reinvented women's bathroom only using degrading language and imagery.
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If trans insanity is not stopped by people waking up and coming to their senses, it will just slowly fall out of fashion, with all that remains being the word woman being replaced by the word menstruator, with everyone understanding what it means and using it for menopausal women, too.
I do hope that at least in the UK, gendernonsense's end will be swift.
Gets my vote.
Let the men cover the door with all the degrading pictures and terms they can think of, to advertise how much they hate us. Let every girl and woman--and "transboy" and "transman"--be reminded day after day of how much men hate them specifically because they are female. Let women and girls pass through that every time they access the one place we are permitted to congregate without males.
Just go full mask-off, lads.
Yes because what every woman wants is for everyone in the goddamn world to know she's on her period! Are these people even functioning humans with functioning brains, at this point I really don't know. the lack of respect and dignity is disgusting.
It literally looks like they tried to make that room as embarassing and gross as possible, like some kind of public shaming.
Right?? Like to punish the girls who complained
I know, it looks like a way to blast to the whole world that a horror movie is being filmed in there. WTAF
All the blood imagery on the door makes me think that opening it will result in that elevator scene from The Shining
The bloody images are transphobic as they will make TIFs and NBs feel uncomfortable about being reminded of female biological functions.
OMG yes LOL it's awful But did the girls do it themselves, in a "reclaiming action" to kind of horrorshock boys from not going in there? I mean. I am wondering.
Trans Women sure do. Are you saying Dylan Mulvaney lied ? /s
so you open the door and its just full of men in dresses with big smiles on their faces itching for you to ask them for a tampon.
I actually laughed out loud on the bus at this. Except it’s not funny really- it’s depressingly accurate.
TW are fascinated by periods as they will never have them.
It would aid in getting rid of the stigma over menstruation, we shouldn't care if people know because it's a process that can't be helped. It's not shameful, it's not embarrassing. It can be messy but if an accident happens we shouldn't be laughed at. We should give younger generations tools and not pass on the shame.
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