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I’m late to the conversation, but I love the internetism of 蝻人 (nǎn rén). It bears the same intensity as ‘scrote’ to me, in that 男人 (nán rén; the usual term for ‘man’) is portmanteau’d with 蝻 (‘immature locust’, ‘cockroach’) to produce something that sounds truly vulgar in Chinese.
Men are genuinely taken aback, and ultimately angry if you express it well, if women tell them (and treat them like) they are non-entitities whose lives mean nothing. That they are just objects that the world wouldn't miss if they all ended themselves. You have to say it very cold and emotionless with full conviction and consistency, quietly reminding them that all the women in their lives are just playing a part. Which is often true.
Men don't care, and laugh, if women think they are garbage because that means they have made women angry and frustrated, which gets them off. But to realize they have no worth or purpose in women's lives is the ultimate insult.
Ooooh I got so many thoughts on this! What's the opposite of love? Indifference. Men are so desperate for female attention it's funny, no wonder they get so angry at radical feminism - the one feminist theory that completely advocates for women to be independent without them.
Since my current situation prevents me from saying the words, I instead use them in action, making my life involve as little men as possible and they are mad at even that. I had male friends ask why I wasn't dating men and when I said "What for?" they'd get so offended.
Yes. Ignore them or act mildly amused. Nothing pisses them off more.
The best response I've found for men is an eyebrow raise or derisive snort followed by a very calm, "okay." Then move on. They hate it.
This is so true. If you want to annoy or insult a man, just ignore him.
There is an abusive aggressive man in my life (family member, I didn't choose him) who will freely throw misogynistic insults/terms of abuse but NOTHING and I mean NOTHING enrages him like being ignored. It's so easy it would be amusing if he wasn't frightening in his rage.
I love 'scrote', 'moid' and I am also hoping to get traction for my composite word 'smegmoid'. We should also come up with something short and male-specific that insults their lack of reasoning skills. And finally we should tell them to "Calm down, and stop being so testerical".
I love testerical so much because in my life it's usually men getting unreasonably angry and emotional vs women trying to placate them.
Smegmoid is hilarious I'm all for it.
Yes! Testerical is fantastic because hysterical is not the exact opposite like it would have been before Something can be hysterically funny - a positive thing. The same is not true for testerical. It's only negative through and through. Let's keep it that way 😈
Right!? I’m so tired of the whole “b*tch is gender neutral” thing. It isn’t. I had no idea Korean radfems did that, but I love it! I do something similar IRL where I use the words “man” and “male” as actual insults. It will never catch on but who cares :D
Another thing that bothers me is this attitude that women shouldn’t be mean about men just because they’re mean vicious about us. We’re expected to be better than that and not to sink to their level of name-calling and immaturity. I think it’s mostly self-imposed female socialization, and that makes me sad. Men don’t think twice about calling women “c_nt”, “wh_re”, “karen”, “b_tch” etc. Who cares if some women want to use words like “moid” or “scrote”?
Some prick at my uni referred to a hypothetical woman as “hag” the other day when we were having a thought experiment. Literally the only information that had been provided was that this hypothetical person was (1) older and (2) female. Yesterday I heard a male classmate call a female teacher “c*nt.” So yeah, not making any efforts to “be kind” until somebody fix men.
hahah are you me gyn? I do that too, refer to male as an actual insult (like they do with female,mirrorring a man who does it to me).
I too am sick of being kind when I hear my fellow sisters being denigrated left and right, sick of how commonplace insults are used against women. There are so many terms in my native language for demeaning women and they are used so casually, I might be 'sensitive' but they make me sick to my stomach.
As for calling men names, I think there is no harm in punching 'up' so to speak. If I insult a man in my culture nothing will happen to him, but if he calls me a 's$ut' for example, my life will literally be ruined.
Language is a very powerful tool and I think women underestimate just how much power female-coded insults have on our oppression. I think normalizing male-coded insults against horrible men would help change thinking. Right now it feels like anything bad = female.
Exactly, loaded language is power. Now if you call a man a rapist or a pedo, you'll do huge damage to his social standing. Creating powerful shaming language means there can be consequences for male violence against women and girls, without the need for violent repercussions. (I have nothing against violence, it's just that for women to use violence against men, we need to outnumber them, and that's not a given in modern society)
I like to randomly tell men that they smell like dick cheese and old urine.
I agree that scrote is the ultimate but there is a word that fills men with rage that they absolutely hate especially when they know it's true: Pervert
Sadly I feel like some men are wearing this label with honor but I hope I'm wrong because this word fits so many of them.
Such is the difference between an insult and a slur: insults for men just do not have the power and history to really sting.
Male insults are lazy because men are fundamentally less intelligent and creative, this is why women tend to score higher in languages/reading comprehension type of standardized tests. In addition, for the past millennia men were all powerful and godlike and anything they said was taken as truth. So their insults could be lazy because they never had to elaborate on what they said because they knew it would be believed. A man could call somebody a bitch and everybody would rush to believe it. There’s not need for complexity, better reasoning skills, playfulness with words if your perspective is always elevated and nobody challenges it
They literally called women witches as if magic existed and all. Men can afford to be as absurd as they want and still be taken seriously.
"Pornsick" is alright but I also think it can just be an accurate descriptor.
I'm not afraid to call a man a "cuck" either, if I know it would particularly bother him.
Edit: ahh, another great one is "testerical"
Coomer and scrote are my favorites. I feel scrote is probably the closest to b**** but yes, it will NEVER hit as hard when a male insulting us has the implication of severe sexual violence and murder.
I haven't heard of this 'cuck', the meaning is so funny to me, do men really have this kind of fetish? Very strange. I like coomer as well for pornsick
It's a fetish but also an old insult originally (re-)popularized by weird men on the alt-right. There's probably an undercurrent of misogyny to it but some men are so deathly afraid of being "bested" reproductively by another man that I find it hilarious.
One of our good second wave words I like: mutant.
I thought this was a gender neutral term! I like it thought, seeing as female is the default sex.
In second wave usage, mutant = male. As in the male sex resulted from a mutation of the normal, default female.
In the German dialect of my grandparents, you call a man either a "schoolboy" or (really hard to translate) "a little guy who smokes cigarettes". The latter is to imply that someone just hangs around being a totally useless and insufferable smartass, the first word is supposed to express that the man being called can't and should not be taken serious.
My grandparents had so many fantastic words, some of the insults are super veiled. Too bad it's going away.
Veiled insults are usually hilarious. Love the latter, it sounds inoffensive but it's quite descriptive.
What’s the actual German for “a little guy who smokes cigarettes”? I would love to add that to my vocabulary.
Zigarettenbürschen :) I don't know how to spell it in dialect, but it's a cool sounding word for sure.
Incel, simp, coomer, cuck, beta, limp-dick, neckbeard, and douchebag tend to be male-targeted.
I don't like beta because I really hate the implication that men who act like aggressive apes are superior to other men. I'd much rather an actual gorilla.
Oh the entire hierarchy is ridiculous and so called "alphas" are toxic, but I'm a fan of hitting them wherever it hurts when needed.
I like insults that reflect my own values, not ones that reinforce their own toxicity. I'd much rather make them feel ashamed for watching porn than for not having girlfriends they're not entitled to anyway.
All of those involve denigrating his ability to use women as sexual toys and douchebag is a misogynistic insult
Exactly, men's insults against each other all imply the inferiority of women. Even when they want to insult another man, they actually do it by insulting his mother (he is a "son of a b-")
Dickhead. Wanker. But again, pretty mild. As you rightly say, the worst insults relate to women's genitals or just the female sex (bitch, cow, mare etc..)
As for reclaiming, I have a pet female canine and I refer to her as a 'bitch' when I'm talking about her. People in the dog show world refer freely to "bitches". It feels empowering somehow, to use the word in its original usage. It takes the sting out of the word as in insult against women. If you use it often enough it becomes normal and then it makes the insult version seem weird. Like, why are you referring to me as a female canine, weirdo?
I always took mare to come from nightmare - as in "I'm having a mare" which is common in the UK if everything is going wrong.
Strange how words have such different power in different places. Wanker to me is a really harsh word to use at someone. I would be shocked at someone using that. And I have never been aware of how offensive the 'b' word is to some women until reading it on here. I knew it as quite mild, used mostly to describe a type of behaviour and used almost as much for men as women.
God yes there is very very strong feeling against the 'b' word on here! I hadn't realised either. Check out all the down-voting going on with my comment about my female dog!
"Having a mare" does come from "nightmare" and "nightmare", although it involves an evil female spirit causing bad dreams, has nothing to do with horses.
For the female horse insult, it usually comes in the form of "you stupid mare" or "you dozy mare". This is a common misogynist insult in some parts of the UK, although was more common in the last century than now. It has a similar impact to "stupid cow" but "mare" has a slightly more "silly, flighty" implication than the dozy stupidity of "cow".
Yeah I was really shocked by the feeling against that word. I guess it's used very differently in the US, so I can understand that response to it.
Interesting about the having a mare origins. Always a woman being blamed for everything 🙄
Dozy mare I have to admit is used affectionately between my female friends. Might have to rethink that.
Phew, I think you might be right about the difference in the force of the word b*tch in USA vs UK. Thanks for that as I was feeing a bit upsetting about the reaction I was getting.
There's a classic American children's book, 'My Friend Flicka' by Mary O'Hara. Written in the 1940s and set on a ranch in Wyoming. Beautiful children's story and was on every school reading list and every school library UNTIL the word btch gained its primary meaning and the original meaning of 'female dog' fell out of general usage. O'Hara uses 'btch" twice to refer to a female dog. The book was removed from school reading lists in some states for this reason (it also had one usage of the word "damn")
So I think there is something very specific culturally about this word in the USA.
(P.S. It is also one of my favourite books of all time)
I was aware of how much more offensive it was as an insult, but this thread has really opened my eyes to it as offensive in the US as a term for a female dog. I honestly don't think many people would bat an eyelid at it being used like that in the UK.
This site has been useful for that, to make me aware of how things that just aren't an issue, or are viewed one way in the UK, are seen and understood completely differently by feminists elsewhere in the world.
ETA this actually just made me think of an incident at work a few years back. A colleague was talking about an IT project he was working on and mentioned that they would train people soon. Only the term he used was "groom". The discussion wasn't in English but he used the English groom and grooming. Myself and a British colleague started to laugh and told him to not use that term. None of our other colleagues understood, they only knew the term from horse and dog grooming and claimed it was the correct IT term to use. We had to explain the alternative context for grooming before he would consider finding another word.
I read that one! Always felt so sorry for poor Rocket and couldn’t stand Ken’s father.
Interesting. I agree 'wanker' is faily strong. Stronger than 'dickhead'. Still nothing like the female-coded words though.
I don't think 'wanker' has the same force in the USA actually? Not sure they even use it?
Edit: the USA equivalent I think would be "jerk off" or "you jerk" which I think it probably a lot milder than our "wanker".
Interesting, I never see “wanker” as particularly strong. I don’t know if most people here (Australia) do, though it’s a common term of derision. I like “tosser,” which I would have picked up from English telly.
I mean, to be fair Aussies take swearing to a whole new level. I lived in Kalgoorlie for a year..... That was an eye opening education!
I travelled for a couple of years in my early 20s, I met up with a Canadian guy who was always asking me to say wanker because he thought he would love it in my accent. I was reasonably sweary but that was just a step too far for me, I couldn't bring myself to say it to him.
That was 20 years ago now, so maybe the sense of the word has softened in that time!
I mean, to be fair Aussies take swearing to a whole new level. I lived in Kalgoorlie for a year..... That was an eye opening education!
LOL very true!
Very interesting, I am unaware of how the word is used in dog show world :D.
In my country, the b word is seen as something extremely heinous so I suppose I grew up thinking it was an absolute no-no haha. I like the way you reclaim it, by using it as the original meaning in a good setting. Yeah, wanker doesn't have the same gut punch as c word.
Ugh. Fuck no to this. Especially the B word being “empowering” 🤮
No the word 'bitch' isn't empowering in itself and I would never use it to refer to a human in any context.
But I feel like I have some power over the word when I use it to describe a female dog because that's what the word means.
I think perhaps it's more common in the UK to refer to female dogs as bitches. I know lots of breeders and show people who do.
Meanings change over time. Its current most common usage is to be a slur against women. It only retains its original meanings to dog owners and/or breeders.
It seriously GOT its misogynistic meaning FROM female dogs. Men are basically calling us dogs that are only good for breeding children.
Yes I know that. I am a dog owner/breeder and so for me bitch is a neutral, correct word that means a female dog.
The etymology is actually even worse than what you've described.
From the earliest usage 'bitch' meant specifically a nasty, mean woman, especially one who is attractive and turns down a man's advances, or who tries to belittle or argue with a man. This is because when bitches (as in female dogs) first come into season (proestrus phase), they will give off powerful pheromones that attract males but if the male shows any interest in her, she will snarl and get very nasty. If a male tries to mount her before she is in full estrous, she can become very aggressive. It's only for about 2 days in the entire 3-4 weeks of her season that she's actually interested in mating. For the rest of the time she is incredibly alluring due to her smell and the swollen appearance of her vulva, but she will refuse to mate and can be aggressive to a dog that tries.
Bitches in season can also be generally crabby and snappy with their owners as well. Although some will be the opposite and become very affectionate and/or clingy and nervous. The aggressive behaviour probably stems from feeling vulnerable as it's physically a very vulnerable time for bitches.
I'm not trying to say it's not misogynistic to call women that word. Of course it is. It's disgusting and horrible. I also understand the instinctive recoil that you all have against this word if you are not used to the original meaning/context.
However in the circles I sometimes move in, "bitch" is the correct, proper and perfectly neutral word for a female dog. In fact if you talk about "girl dogs" or even "female dogs" it can make you sound a bit silly because "girl" is a human (so anthropomorphism) and "dog" generally means "male canine".
I can see you all think I just "don't get it" but I assure you I do. I just also happen to belong to a culture where this is what "bitch" means, and I'm not going to let misogyny and patriarchy stop me from using the word with its correct meaning in the appropriate context.
You sound like you love to call your dog that word as much as often to “reclaim” it, and that it’s “empowering.” Tell me how it’s empowering to other women.
It's not offensive for me to refer to my dog as a bitch because THAT'S WHAT SHE IS. She is a female dog. This is the meaning of the word long before men decided to use it as a slur for women.
It describes the biological reality of the animal. Just like doe, vixen, lioness, mare, sow, ewe. We have these words. Like 'woman'.
I'm not using b*tch to refer to myself or other women. I'm not trying to "reclaim it" for women (would make no sense as I am not using it for women nor did it originally refer to women). I'm not talking about libfem-style empowerment "taking back" slurs against women by using them to refer to oneself or other women.
This is completely different. The word bitch means female dog.
It's not slang used for a female dog. It's a correct term.
It's not a slur against a female dog. It's a description of biological reality and biological sex in canines.
If someone wants to be offended by biological reality and the words we use to describe it, that's their problem.
It's neither empowering nor disempower to other women. It's not about women. IT'S ABOUT DOGS.
You're telling me all the names of the classes at the lure coursing meets I go to, all the classes in all the dog shows, all the breeders, showers, enthusiasts that I know - the majority of whom are female - you're telling me they're all misogynistic and are denigrating women by calling female dogs bitches? You think I should stop referring to female dogs as bitches, in those circles, because it offends you?
What about calling female horses mares? Female cattle cows? You have a problem with that too?
The word "cow" is universally used in farming to refer to female bovines, but as far as I can see, that does nothing to defang it when used as an insult to women
You're right. I hadn't thought of that.
I'm still going to refer to my female dog as a bitch though. It's actually a nice word. Like vixen or doe. For me, bitch primarily means a female canine.
I'll never call my female dog a bitch. I think it's an ugly word.
I don't call my female dog "bitch". I call her by her name. But in context I will say she is a bitch when I talk about her or female dogs in general, e.g. "when bitches come into season" etc.
If you do any kind of competitive dog activities in the UK (showing, sporting, coursing, racing) as well as any connections in the breeding world, you hear the word 'bitch' used A LOT to describe female dogs. When I started a few years ago I found it jarring the first time a very plummy posh breeder said to me in her light drawl, "she's a very nice bitch" but now it's normal. When everyone around you is saying it all the time with reference to cute, beautiful female dogs the word loses all obscenity and just means a female dog.
Meaning is created by usage and the more I use and hear this word to mean female dog, the more that's just what it means. And seeing as I like female dogs, I like the word.
I'm entering my bitch into a lure coursing contest next month. The categories are
Whippet Bitch (standard)
Whippet Bitch (sprinter)
Whippet Dog (standard
Whippet Dog (sprinter)
Here is a list of acronyms for the main showing categories for female canines:
Bitches
MPB — Minor Puppy Bitch
PB — Puppy Bitch
JB — Junior Bitch
YB — Yearling Bitch
NB — Novice Bitch
GB — Graduate Bitch
PGB — Post Graduate Bitch
LB — Limit Bitch
OB — Open Bitch
VB — Veteran Bitch
SBB —Special Beginners Bitch
Could you please stop talking to me about this? I've already indicated I DON'T LIKE IT. So sod off, please. Gawd, I'm getting so irritated with this site.
I hope none of you who are freaking out about this ever goes to a dog show in the UK (Crufts, anyone?) or you would all have seizures at the terribly misogynistic slurs constantly being directed towards female dogs and within earshot of women and everything.
Bastard, scrote (used a lot where I'm from but is for a specific type of bloke), dickhead, ballbag, wanker, knob jockey.
I saw another poster saying wanker is mild, perhaps that's a geographical thing because I view it as pretty harsh. Any man saying it to another man would be risking getting punched for using it.
But I agree the worst insults are female biased - c word and t word probably considered the worst as I was growing up.
Then there's the ones used mostly for comedic effect - dick weasel, wankbadger, toss pot.
I use dickweed or wankbadger.
But agree they aren’t as harsh as misogynistic slurs. You missed out dochebag as well, which imho always sounds so rape-victim-blamey it’s the worst of the lot.
Pussy refers to pussy footing around things= cowardice. So it’s ambiguous in it’s use as an insult.
I hate douchebag, I used to think it was a great insult before knowing the true meaning :/, I assumed it had something to do with male anatomy before.
I think porn has completely ruined the word pussy and unfortunately, most people use it with ill intent towards women, thus I don't like it anymore.
Oh I know. I just think that sucks, because pussyfooting around is actually a good descriptor for cowardice.
Jerkface, dickf@#ker, fatherf@#cker, son of a prick, goatballs (because they stink!), and several others insulting their genitals and lack of sexual prowess - because they are so obsessed with it. Insult them where it hurts.
GOATBALLS HAHAHAH I love u <3. Very true, since most of them have dumb ideas on sexuality...
A good feminist language against men would:
You can take advantage of a man's insecurity about performing masculinity and being dominant, and this will be powerfully shaming, but it won't reflect feminist values. I don't want to use words like "beta" or "cuck" or "virgin" because according to my feminist values, there is nothing to be proud of in being an aggressive ape who coerces women into sex and restricts their freedom.
I'd much use it to shame them for doing things I actually consider shameful: raping, being violent, watching porn, not respecting boundaries, etc.
I already saw scrote, but chode is a personal favorite. A penis that is bigger around than it is long lol.
I don't think I've ever heard a woman be called a Guido, wop, or sand n-word; I'm thinking lots of ethnic slurs and insults arent exactly male specific but they wouldn't commonly be applied to women. Hope those words are allowed to be printed here referentially, I'm not certain lol
Thank you for giving me the word 'Chode', I like it :D.
INot sure about the other terms, they feel more racist than anti-male to me. It is true though, they are male-specific.
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I've never heard of that word! Quite funny, I just looked it up, we should bring it back LOL.
You sound like a very kind person. I am surrounded by horrid men and thinking of words to call them in my head helps me deal, hence this thread LOL 🤷🏼♀️. I do think it is an injustice how much language exists to demean innocent women but men get zero insults that describe their depravity.
I get your point on insulting their behavior, makes sense to me.
Scrote is excellent. It’s by and for females and men hate it. They HATE it. It could easily become a b word equivalent.
Men get so mad when you say it as if they don't say the b and c-words all the time.
I love scrote ngl, let's make it more popular