Hey, I'm sorry to hear you're feeling like this. As someone who has struggled with major depression that cycles back around every few years, I understand. The only "good" thing is that it is a cycle and though things right now feel bleak and pointless, it won't always be like that. I tried to take my life 11 years ago, and then 6 years ago I suffered from suicidal ideation so badly I was hospitalized. I would have missed out on so much joy had I not held on and kept going, even when I was suffering. There is joy waiting for you too. Please hold on.

I hear you and see you. If there's any little thing that brings you some happiness, please treat yourself. You're not pointless. Your existence is real, and valued.

I hope your ok, I know that its not easy when your in that frame of mind but I promise everything passes, every situation, every emotion, how you feel now isn't forever or even for long. Please do whatever you can to just take care at the moment and if you have someone you can call or speak to please do. Wishing you the best.

Lifelong mental illness sufferer here. Been exactly where you are more times than I can count. Eventually you will feel better. Its gonna be ok. ❤

I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way OP. I kind of know the feeling, and how exhausting it is. I think it’s a really good sign that you posted here. You might not feel it, but it’s a huge sign of strength that you’re reaching out.

Your existence is NOT pointless, I promise you. If you feel like it, please keep talking to us here. As others have said, speak to a doctor. If they can’t offer the right support, keep looking until you find a professional who can help. I know it’s easier said than done, but I honestly believe in you.

It can get a lot better than this. I urge you to seek out an appointment with your doctor and tell her exactly what you told us here. You are not worthless or pointless and you deserve to feel better - and you can.

I go through bouts of depression too. I think most people do, but we all feel so much pressure to just get on with it and ignore how we feel. As I get older, it helps during those times to remember that I've been through it before, and it does pass eventually. Passes a little quicker with some self care.

Do what you need to do right now to take care of yourself. Keep venting here if it helps. Get lots of sleep. Push yourself as much as you can to get outside in the fresh air. Dial back on work. Maybe take a vacation if possible. Lord knows we all need one after the year we've had.

We care about you. Hope you start feeling better soon, but if not that's OK too! Eventually it will start to get better though.

Im so sorry that you’re feeling down like this. I’m not sure where you’re located but if you’re in the US I strongly recommend looking into ketamine infusions or the esketamine nasal spray that’s called Spravato. I had been severely depressed for over ten years and was diagnosed with treatment resistant depression and ketamine infusions have changed my life. I was suicidal the days leading up to my first infusion and felt the results immediately after. The next morning I woke up finally feeling like I could breathe again and I haven’t been depressed ever since. That was over two years ago and my last infusion was a little over one year ago and I haven’t needed to go back for a maintenance infusion yet. It’s truly a breakthrough for treating depression quickly and I recommend it to anyone I know thats suffering. I hope you feel better soon ❤️ I’m here if you even need anyone to talk to.

One thing that has helped my depression is realizing that emotions don't have ranks. Happiness, or love, or whatever, are not necessarily the best emotions. Other emotions may be better for you.

You might be someone who feels better with contentment, thrill seeking, purpose, accomplishment, or spirituality. Even sadness can be a good emotion for somebody, because it shows them that they have something they value enough to be sad about. It's why tear-jerker movies exist!

So it's okay if you don't feel happy, maybe it means that you are meant to have another emotion that inspires you. Experiment to find something that provokes any positive reaction, and explore that feeling to get a sense of what sparks your mind.

Sorry to hear that you're hurting. ❤ I've been through my own battles with depression that I never thought I would win, but I am still here to experience this world. Small things like seeing a puppy while I walk outside make me happy, and I hold onto these moments. Life can be painful and feel pointless, but your being here is valuable and you are important. Every encounter someone has with you, everyone you talk to--your existence matters. Please do whatever gives you even a little bit of joy/mental reprieve. This dark night will pass. We're all in it together and I'm rooting for you.

Do you play an instrument? If not you should get a cheap guitar and mess around with it. It never fails to stabilize my mood even if I feel too horrible to do anything else.

I don't have any advic. Just a hug. I hear you and I'm happy you exist ❤️💐

I can’t stress enough how listening to music and spending time in nature has helped me by taking me outside of my own head. I hope you feel better soon.

I want you to know that you are heard. I know that existence does feel pointless at times when depression is at its worst. I’ve dealt with it and it does feel like a battle sometimes. The fact that you reached out to share how you are feeling shows that the biggest part of you will continue to do your very best to deal with it.

Someone here mentioned that it is a cycle. When you are in the midst of it and it is at its worst, it feels like you are in a never-ending circle. I try to look at it more like waves in the ocean. They hit the shore, but the wave always goes back out again. I hold onto those moments. I hope that you continue to hold on to them, too.

Are you in physical pain? I find that really grinds my mood down and I have to really focus on my exercises to get better.

Thank you everyone for your kind messages. Sorry I didn't reply to all of you individually.. After I posted this, I had a long sleep, then set up counselling and appointments with my GP and my psychiatrist. If I could finally reach the point of just accepting depression as a friend instead of getting frustrated every time I feel suicidal, I bet I would feel so much better. I wish I could give all of you a big hug. It is nice to know so many understand how I feel. Thank you.

It'll pass, just give it time, I've been there 💜