There is a lot of guff and fluff below that some may find interesting and others may not. If this is looking a bit long to read, please go directly to the bolded section in the very last paragraph.

I was inspired to write this post by a comment in another thread from @ToNorth describing how so many women are terribly distracted. Here is an excerpt from the comment:

There is also so much pointless stuff that has overtaken women's lives too.Women are doing multi step expensive "maintenance" beauty routines, getting Botox and plastic surgery. Buying a ton of skincare, haircare, makeup, clothing etc. Doing their lashes, nails, hair and more. Those are the things that are most talked about online too, especially with respect to celebrity and influencers. Everything is a distraction, but women are the ones being distracted. Any movement is sabotaged right away, any movement that's anti trans inevitably becomes anti abortion simply because of strange bedfellows. We can always join together but we don't fight hard enough for what we have, to say this we can compromise on and this is non negotiable and we will fight you alongside our common enemy on it.

I have been dedicating my late 20s to trying to improve myself so that by the time I am 30, I will be a far more effective feminist, and a lot of that has to do with priorities and focus. Here are some things I have been working on:

• Significantly improving my mental and physical health. These are deeply interconnected. Working with and in service of other women can be mentally very taxing. There is an absolute ocean of women's pain out there, both individually and collectively, and it can be overwhelming. I say this as an average Jane; I am sure we have lawyers, social workers, and other boots-on-the-ground women who are dealing with waves of this on a daily basis. Having the tools to process that without becoming demoralized and discouraged is a must. Physical health contributes to mental health, but also, physical health problems will deplete resources like time and money, so I strive to prevent as many as possible.

• Really buckling down on career. In the workforce, we not only have the opportunity to accrue money (which is quite important for effective activism), but also to exert influence in whatever our field is. Not every woman is a doctor that can dedicate her life to curing ovarian cancer, or an AI engineer who can solve the deepfake problem, but I bet at your job, you can exert positive influence for other women in some way. (If you aren't sure how you can have a positive influence at your job, maybe we can work together in the comments to inspire you.)

• Getting caught up on feminist history and philosophy. I don't know about you, but I effectively didn't learn any women's history in school. I am trying to get through a bunch of books to avoid the classic feminist issue of reinventing the wheel with each new wave, and I'm sharing what I read with the real-life women around me.

• Connecting with other women. Maybe it's a generational thing, but connection is hard to come by. I'm pleased to say I have made enormous progress meeting all kinds of women and forming connections. I am not just looking for likeminded women, but all kinds of women. Consciousness-raising has to start somewhere, and in my experience, most of us are much more similar than we are different. A decent amount of women out there are lonely—and loneliness weakens us. Plus, meeting more women and understanding their perspectives can help me be a more effective advocate for women who are from different walks of life than I am.

• Improving my communication skills. I used to be quite good at both oral and written communication, but in the past 5 years or so, my quality of communication has really degraded. I am working to improve both. Being avoidably misunderstood is a massive waste of time and effort, and I have a lot of room for improvement there. I hope that in 2026 I can look back at this post and think, "Wow, my current posts are so much more articulate and clear!"

• Doing some things I'm good at. This boosts self-esteem for me and gives me confidence, which is something I deeply lack in real life. It's hard to speak up when you don't believe in yourself, as cheesy as that sounds, so dedicating a little time to self-esteem building seems well worth it. When I know I can do something well, I am better able to trust myself and stick to my values in other areas of life. I think this is especially important in a season of growth and striving, when it's easy to get caught up in how far I have left to go to reach a goal. Additionally, I've noticed that many women seem insecure about their skills, even when they're really strong in an area. In my opinion, this has led to a dearth of female role models. Men idolize their gym trainers, older bandmates, and the guys they play sports with, because those guys inspire them to wonder what they themselves could do with some practice. I want to show other women that women can be good at things, because I feel like a lot of women around me don't always realize that. To this end, I have been trying out a two-pronged approach: (1) demonstrate that I can do whatever the thing is, and it isn't that scary or difficult, and (2) give a show of confidence to another woman and find something about her effort to encourage. So far it has seemed extremely effective, and it's one of my favorite aspects of this whole list.

You can also double up on some of the ones I've listed here. For example, why not join a fitness class and extend a warm smile to the other women there? Or maybe you are really good at an instrument—build that self-esteem by joining a band, and make conversation with other women there. Or you could do a book club with a close friend, reading a feminist or feminist-adjacent book together, thereby deepening your connection while focusing on women's art, history, or philosophy.

I am sure there are many practices that I haven't even thought of yet. Bear in mind I have more free time as I don't have kids, aging parents, or a commute, and my husband is not actively ruining my life as so many tend to do (in fact he actively supports much of this).

Bottom Line Here: I've mentioned what I'm doing over a ~5-year period as a woman with way more free time than most, but 2025 all by itself is shaping up to be a very serious year for all women. For American women, we are buckling in for a rough ride. If you are feeling up to it, why don't you think of one thing you can do to make yourself more equipped as a feminist in 2025? If this post gets any interest, I would definitely be willing to do a monthly check-in post where we can share how we're doing, offer support and concrete tips, and encourage each other. You do not need to write a long list (but if you want to, feel free). A lot of you already have a lot going on. Even if you think of one way to get stronger this year, that will be such a boon for yourself, everyone around you, and women everywhere.