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Monthly StatsNovember 29, 2020 stats
##Totals so far
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##November stats
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New Circles: 4
Site activity this month:
384 users made posts
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###Past months
Just gonna drop a joke from Rick and Morty that sums it up:
Beth: Do you want homeless people to have homes?
Jerry: Yes...?
Beth: Are you going to build them?
Jerry: No...
Beth: Then what good was the 'yes'?
Because there's no effort required to look like a good person.
Yeah, even prior to when I peaked, I never said stuff like that. I just used to think that TiMs were all "suffering with debilitating gender dysphoria" and mostly all gay men, which I know a lot of people on here thought as well and what quite a few people out in the world still think.
Then when I was a teenager and still quite underage, I had multiple TiMs groom me when they knew my age and they also specifically targeted my sexuality (I was coming to terms with being bisexual and they said that they wanted to be in "lesbian relationships" with me -- and yes, they all looked exactly like you could imagine). I had never asked for them to be saying things to me or for any of the things that some of them sent me that were literally very illegal to be sending to a child who was just coming to terms with her sexuality. And then I started seeing more and more TiMs on social media, who were just also regular straight men that would pretend to be lesbians, and I would see them lump themselves into all sorts of conversations that were not meant for them because "I'm a woman just like any other woman" and I remember just feeling this pit in my stomach like this stuff is just not right.
And it only kept getting worse from there. Grown ass TiMs in support groups online were telling me, an underaged child who expressed dissatisfaction (an understatement) about having periods because they were usually very painful and a horrible sensory issue for me too, and these grown ass men would tell me to shut the fuck up because it made them dysphoric and they would love to be in my position and have periods! A completely and totally normal thing to say as a 40+ year old man to a 14-15 year old girl.
Then when I was 15 I had a part-time retail job as a cashier where this man aged at the the very youngest in his early 50s, regularly came in wearing tight, short skirts. I can't remember if he had bolt-ons or if he just stuffed his upper part of his shirts or dresses or whatever else he wore, but if I'm remembering correctly, he was somehow friends or something with one of the girls I worked with who was either also underage, or something still quite young like 18-19. He would regularly go to my register and buy skirts, dresses, bras, etc. and try to chat with me and he would actually ask me to hang out with him. When I think back to that now, it's really fucking bizarre and incredibly inappropriate. I think he also found out from the other girl/woman that I dabble in singing, and he told me I should give him "voice lessons" so he could "sound more like a girl". I swear to you these are real interactions I have had.
Then I started seeing more articles about how men like this are just the same as women, and that the highest paid "female" CEO is a man, and I had tons more unpleasant interactions with TiMs. Support groups, therapy groups, online, etc. and they would always make it about themselves. One of my support groups was for women only, and they let this guy in and there were literally other women there that just couldn't help at some point to "politely" point out once that this guy was taking over the whole entire group because he would talk constantly over any other woman. I had to leave that group also because, fucking surprise surprise, he hit on me and gave me his number and tried to get me to meet with him outside of the group. He told me that he was in the process of divorcing his wife because of his "transition".
I had another TiM stalk my photos online (another reason why I both do not use social media much anymore and also private my Facebook photos) when I used to use social media more, and say that I'm so "feminine looking" that I gave him "the courage to transition" and essentially said he wanted to wear my skin. Another creepy old fucking guy.
I've talked to and met a whole lot of TiMs and read a whole lot of the things that they say online. Not sure how many more I need to meet or see to be able to determine that the vast majority of them do not seem to have any problem acting worse than regular men. I guess it's because they usually also tend to have cluster B personality disorders in a lot of a higher percentage than the regular population.
Everything you've described is awful.
Grown ass TiMs in support groups online were telling me, an underaged child who expressed dissatisfaction (an understatement) about having periods because they were usually very painful and a horrible sensory issue for me too, and these grown ass men would tell me to shut the fuck up because it made them dysphoric and they would love to be in my position and have periods! A completely and totally normal thing to say as a 40+ year old man to a 14-15 year old girl.
Oh yes, totally normal.
I never experienced the predation you did, but in my 20s, I did work with one who would often make very sexual remarks to me and jokes about my proposed sexual proclivities and desires. I laughed it off, and honestly it didn't offend me horribly, it was more just boring and weird. But I didn't realize until years later that this man was in his late 40s at least, possibly his 50s. There were other women his age there (I was the only one in my 20s) and he never harassed them to that extent.
I highly recommend MaryCate Delvey on X and “her “listen to trans people series. She just posts them talking. It’s enough to peak anyone!
You don't understand, it's the CONTEXT. 😡 It's fine when I talk about masturbating to my actual sister in my mother's panties to my fellow trans sisters, but not when TERFs post an unaltered screenshot of me saying it to the normie masses who had assumed transwomen were all dysphoric sad confused gays!
I just read a post on FB this morning from a male arguing about trans women in bathrooms. The topic was the fear of being sexually assaulted by a TIM in a bathroom and this male goes on to say, I don't know why women are afraid of trans women in bathrooms, they (The TIMs) aren't even attracted to women." I had to comment under his post to let him know that even pro-trans sources have stats that say up to 30-40% of TIMs identify as being attracted to women.
He never replied back, but just another example of people spewing nonsense without any source to back them up.
I had to comment under his post to let him know that even pro-trans sources have stats that say up to 30-40% of TIMs identify as being attracted to women.
The figures you cite might be true of TIMs globally because in many parts of the world where homosexuality is taboo or illegal, a significant portion of gay men become TIMs because there's no other option for them. Hence the gay "ladyboys" in/from East Asia, Samoan fa'afafine, hijra on/from the Indian subcontinent, travesti in/from Latin America, the muxes in/from parts of Mexico. Also, in many homophobic cultures pretty young boys are groomed and sold into bondage where they must pretend to be "girly" whilst serving as sex slaves, dancers/entertainers, domestic and personal servants to the grown men who control them, as in the case of the bacha bazi of Afghanistan.
But in Western countries like the USA, Canada, the UK and continential Europe, the overwhelming majority of TIMs are AGPs attracted to women who became "trans" because it gives them boners and gives them super-duper sexual pleasure. Terms these guys frequently use are "gender euphoria," "euphoria boner" and "trans joy" - which all mean the same thing: makes their dicks hard and happy.
When speaking of TIMs from and in North America and Europe, the percentage who are attracted to women is more like 80-90%, not 30-40%.
Yes, I know. I was just quoting a trans-friendly source for him to show him that even they show a significant amount of them are in fact attracted to women. He's a straight dude from the Midwest who has never interacted with a trans person and naively thought all trans people are straight. I've had this conversation with so many people here in the US; they think all TIMs date men and they mostly have no idea about transbians and are quite surprised to learn this.
Yeah, this is literally half the reason some men are so eager to shove these creeps onto us. They think other men and boys are their target.
The other half the time, they know all about “transbians” and fuck do they love it, because hurting women out of spite is their primary life goal.
But even "trans-friendly" sources wouldn't say that only 30-40% of TIMs in countries like the USA are opposite-sex attracted. All the leading TRA orgs in the USA whose reports I'm familiar with have long acknowledged that in the USA the large majority of TIMs are attracted to women. Meaning they're what most people would call heterosexual or bisexual.
For example, in 2011 the USA's National Center for Transgender Equality and the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force published a report based on a survey of 6-7,000 TIPs in the USA. It says that less than a quarter of respondents identify as "heterosexual," which TIPs and the other gender cultists use to mean homosexual.
https://www.thetaskforce.org/app/uploads/2019/07/ntds_full.pdf
Twenty-three percent (23%) said they were gay, lesbian, or same gender loving, 25% bisexual, 4% asexual and 23% queer. Two percent (2%) said their sexual orientation was something else such as trans-attracted.
This leaves less than ¼, or 23%, of transgender survey respondents identifying as straight. Trans people who are straight—trans women who are only romantically and sexually interested in men and trans men who are only romantically and sexually interested in women—are often also incredible allies to [TIPs who "identify as"] lesbian, gay, bisexual and queer
https://www.thetaskforce.org/news/wonky-wednesday-trans-people-and-sexual-orientation/
A 2023 paper by prominent trans-activist academics in the USA based on surveying and interviewing TIPs in the USA found that nearly 70% of TIMs are what ordinary people understand as either bisexual or heterosexual, but the gender cult makes much more complicated:
Among transgender women, 68.4% were attracted to cisgender women, 65.7% to cisgender men, 49.7% to transgender women, 42.5% to transgender men, 49.6% to AFAB nonbinary, and 43.8% to AMAB nonbinary.
Respondents endorsed multiple attractions, with 58.2% of transgender men, 57.1% of transgender women, and 77.8% of nonbinary individuals reporting attractions to ≥ 3 partner genders (Fig. 2C).
Relative to the cisgender population, a higher proportion of the transgender population identifies as a sexual minority. The most reported sexual identities were bisexual and queer, highlighting the importance of having included response options beyond gay, lesbian, and bisexual, which are traditionally included in survey research.
Further, the distribution of sexual partner genders and sexual attractions was more heterogenous for the transgender than cisgender population. Relative to cisgender people, a higher proportion of transgender people endorsed cisgender women, transgender women, and transgender men as sexual partners in the last 5 years.
Transgender people also had a more even spread of sexual attractions across [a number and wide variety of] gender groups, relative to cisgender people, who primarily reported attractions to cisgender women and men
I'd hazard a guess that most so-called "cisgender people" have never heard of most of the other "gender groups" the gender cultists say they are attracted to.
https://bmcpublichealth.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/s12889-023-16654-z
Not sure why we're doing his back and forth thing here. I quoted him a 2017 study. It was an FB post, I'm not writing him an essay.
Yes, I remember reading an article ten years ago that said 80% of male crossdressers are heterosexual. I have tried to find the article since and couldn’t find it.
And way more than he thinks still have their penis. And can/ do use it.
That was a super eye opening moment to me.
Yep. Most estimates say 8-13% undergo bottom surgery. In other words, 90% of trans women may keep their penis for life.
Even if we assume that’s an undercount and triple it….that’s still well less than half. Only about half of respondents in the national survey even express clear interest in having surgery at all, which debunks the argument that barriers to access explain the low numbers.
Nevermind the “what if inverting your penis into a vagina and ignoring all other female sex-specific organs makes you literally female??” arguments. Statistically we should always assume an intact male with a penis.
Another sleight-of-hand you’ll notice on places like Reddit is that people will handwave this by insisting that estrogen renders that penis basically useless…until someone expresses (valid) concerns about fertility or sexual function, when dozens of TIMs will suddenly show up to describe just how well their dick still works. Hmmm.
Thank you! I still didn’t even realize that it was that many. On the subject of their working dicks, I also understand that most of them are straight. A great fallacy I fell for was that most of them were gay. Nope.
It was 3 years ago that I started having a lot of TIMs in my social group. Before that, my exposure was with benign if mislead transmen in the workplace. My beginning of descent up the peak was being asked to support one that I worked with who was getting a third revision to the ol phalloplasty. So matter of factly stating in the lunchroom that it was for her girlfriend who was very codependent and that they chose the "huge but needs a pump to obtain an erection" model.
It was a head scratcher but having multiple TIMs and their allies cause nothing but trouble, contribute no net positives but demand respect and touchie feelies had me up the highest heights of TERF mountain a couple of years later. Literally demanding a chorus of TWAW or being somehow offended by their own strength when compared to a biological woman. Just like regular ol cis men, looking for one that can act remotely civilized is looking for a rare exception.
Oh nooo, I can't imagine actually saying something like that let alone being proud of it @ the phalloplasty revision
My friend group has always been the "be kind" group, but as one friend who usually hosts everyone has invited more and more TIMs to her house, I think she's realizing subconsciously they're a drain on her. She was complaining to me a while ago that they all come without any money and expect her to pay for them at restaurants and feed them the whole time, plus get gifts, and then help them get gas money to go back home. I'm hoping she gets the whole image soon!
Oh my gosh your friend is a doormat... have you gently asked what value these people bring to her life? I grew up in such a way that I never once asked myself this until my 30s. It is an important skill for young women to have I think. To learn to centre themselves and not men.
I wont give specifics for her privacy but yes there's 100% a reason for her being such a doormat dealing with some abuse for her. I'm trying to help her to stick up for herself more and realize that those freaks are just taking advantage of her because she's nice, and I think she's slowly seeing more and more thankfully.
Im glad that she has a friend like you. It will make all the difference for her down the line, i am sure of it.
What!!! That’s crazy, I’m shocked she paid for the group at the restaurant even once 🤯
Same here. I conveniently missed that outing and have been skipping any one she invites any TIME gaggles to. I think most of the small friend group we have does the same honestly, no one wants to deal with them
So matter of factly stating in the lunchroom that it was for her girlfriend who was very codependent and that they chose the "huge but needs a pump to obtain an erection" model.
But somehow this is so much more normal and healthy than "I'm getting a massive boob job for my boyfriend", right?
Young girls are being groomed. I read a blog about it on instagram, that they are pushed to follow OFers. So, i wouldn't be surprised if these same pornographers are pushing acceptance of trans, which is another fetish. Society is mass grooming. I can't open Facebook without seeing women dancing in bikinis and pro-trans stuff. https://medium.com/@brandidalhover/onlyfans-is-mass-grooming-teen-girls-on-instagram-c181e00f6ad0
It's good advice. The more I read from TIPs the more radfem my thinking became.
I know several women who known trans-identified males in person. And no, they're not all effeminate gay men. One is an obvious man in his 30s who dresses like a teen girl/tween from the 1990s. He's not massive size-wise, but there's nothing effeminate about him. The women all fawn over him.
One time I ran into a guy who I got really creeped by. He was petite but obviously masculine (and actually quite handsome), but dressed in skintight "sexy" clothes and and spoke in the creepiest little-girl voice that was obviously fake and very affected. I don't remember if women fawned but he was well-accepted in general.
And I realize that so many people spouting this nonsense have never met a trans woman or at least haven't spoken to one or spent any amount of time around them. I have 2.5 I have to regularly deal with,
A lot of people who spout this nonsense deal with TIMs sometimes, though. How many of the other people in your office or wherever you deal with the ones in your life are also GC? People commonly seem to be able to simply recategorize TIMs and then it's okay - they're not really read as women, a woman who came to work in fishnet stockings and talking about orgasms would be in need of serious help, poor thing, get her to a clinic. But they're not men, since men wear suits dumb dumb! That person has long hair! So she's a woman! But it's automatically political theater that on some level everyone gets is symbolic, so as soon as it happens, they rally around it, like wearing pussy hats or throwing cream pies at senators - it's accepted bc it's trans. Having a trans person in their peer group, in their workplace or parent group or whatever, is another pat on the back. They mostly won't see individuals or how their behavior mimics female stereotypes, they'll just see "trans" & be satisfied that they're progressive.
Except for those instances when reality slips through, like the person apologizing for thinking bad thoughts - when they start to wonder, but why are they doing that at the staff meeting? or when we're just here to watch the school play? Some push the thoughts away & others will shift or even peak, but that doesn't mean that people who are pro-trans don't know trans people. Some people never get those thoughts to start with. Especially among men, or women who love fashion & over-performance (drama queen/ diva types) things work in simplistic categories and there's no need for deeper engagement.
I’m in a liberal college and have to deal with both TIMS and TIFS. Not even 3 minutes passed in my first class when the TIM started over sharing about his surgeries and explicitly talking about his sexual life and feminine “orgasms” to the whole class. The funniest thing is that they all think they pass (both TIMS and TIFS) but I immediately clocked them, they look abnormal and try too hard to fit into their imaginary roles. I feel like I am going insane and can’t make any friends as they are all so deeply woven in their genderwoo bullshit.
Ew. And because I'm a gullible person, if a man (or woman) started telling me they'd just had crotch surgery and their genitals all mangled up, I would actually believe them about their orgasms. Or I would have until a few years ago. Now, I regard such claims much more skeptically. It seems to me that any surgery on any area covers a serious risk of nerve damage. I won't say no one can have any sexual function after something like that, but I don't think there will be any great orgasms, "feminine" or otherwise.