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General interestMy rich and out-of-touch tech bro friends
I have been friends for almost 30 years with this group of guys from high school. We're all in our early 40s now. A great many of them have worked for a very, very famous tech company in the past (which I cannot name).
One dude, (who - incidentally- was born with a silver spoon in his mouth), is doing extremely well financially. His custom-built home resembles a high end office building. It's absolutely huge. He lives there with his beautiful young wife, domestic staff, and their dog.
There is absolutely no doubt in my mind that he's an intelligent and hard working man. However, he does not seem to understand that most of us don't live the way that he does.
He was recently complaining that he didn't understand why more of his staff had not personally purchased the Apple Vision Pro, which he believes would increase productivity among his staff. I checked the price on it. It's at least $3499.
I gently suggested to him that this device is not something that everyone can afford.
He then retorted that most of his employees should be able to afford the Apple Vision Pro because his staff members pay $350/month for a train ticket to commute into (a major American city).
Perhaps he is right and his employees could shell out their personal money for the Apple Vision pro. But why should they have to? What if the train ticket is the biggest strain on their budget(s)?
Weird argument. People pay to commute because they can't afford to rent or buy closer.
Who does the increased productivity benefit? Him.
Who does he want to pay for it? Not him.
The reason the employees don't buy it is because there is little incentive for them to do so. Even if they're all rich and can easily afford it, they don't want to spend their money on something to make their boss wealthier.
He sounds like a douche, and I caught that young wife part.
How about instead of looking at what his staff pays for transportation (which has become disgusting) and more on how much he pays his staff. If it would help productivity so much then he can make it a company expense.
He's always been a frat boy douche. All the way back to when he and I were both 21 years old and he'd randomly show up at my apartment in his Abercrombie and Fitch flip flops at 11 pm with a half-empty bottle of Grey Goose and a package of condoms. "Uhh, are you busy tonight?". I'm so glad I eventually worked on my self esteem.
Yeah, how is the that removed from the reality of his employees when he is the one who pays them?
(I mean, the attitude is, frankly, entitled regardless of how much they earn. I've worked a variety of office jobs, and never once was I asked to buy any of the work materials. It's not even a matter of being able to afford it, it's a matter of spending your hard-earned money however you see fit, and your employer buying anything that he feels would increase your productivity.)
Power and wealth has been shown in multiple studies to significantly diminish empathy.
He was probably never in the position where he had to choose. Pay rent or go on holiday? Get the car exhaust fixed or go to a concert with your friends? Replace your old washing machine or buy a new gaming console? Those are decisions most of us have to make every day, but if you grew up rich, chances are you grew up thinking that when there's no money left in your wallet, you simply go to the nearest ATM and get some more.
These folks haven't used cash for decades
Nah, they absolutely use cash. It's very helpful for shady shit when you want a little less financial scrutiny.
I was gonna say, having lots of liquid cash on hand says “rich” to me. Having a high credit card balance you can’t pay every month says “poor”.
There's also often a difference between how generationally/long-term rich people versus temporarily rich people approach it; the former tend to be relatively understated and less conspicuous/flashy, live within their means, and always have an eye on where to cut costs, while people who have suddenly found themselves wealthy can very quickly and easily spend themselves into a very deep hole. Plus just the sheer number of rich people who could easily be busted for tax evasion in one form or another, whether employing/paying people for services under the table, accepting payments for things in cash, making huge purchases in cash without paying sales taxes, etc. Credit/transactions conducted through a bank are for things that are write-offs, or conspicuous (main income, real estate, etc.).
TLDR, 'real' rich people aren't just good at spending money, but at saving it. And one of the ways a lot of them save it unscrupulously is by cutting the government out of getting a cut of a lot of transactions, which tends to mean cash. More above board, it means not paying interest on credit card balances.
I only have a debit card...
I had this mindset for a long time and totally understand it. But you can’t do a chargeback on a debit card so it is a little dangerous. Using a credit card exactly the same way you’d use a debit card does often come with perks and I haven’t had a downside yet. You just have to have your budget locked down ahead of time and stick to it. I know people like to say points encourage you to spend more but no. They really don’t always. It’s just free money because the companies want you to pay them a ton of interest, and I simply do not.
100% this. Credit cards can be an awesome tool as long as you stay in control of your spending.
That’s what crypto’s for.
Crypto's certainly become an option for that, which might or might not be convenient/viable depending on what they want to do with it, and may or may not be trusted (for good reason).
I know. I used the example to better explain the mindset I was talking about. The idea that money is just kind of there whenever you need it.
WHAT. If this company is so fancy, why aren’t they paying for those train tickets?! And why doesn’t he demand a budget for AVP for his staff if it’s so important?
And maybe this is a limit of my imagination, but having seen several AVP reviews, what the hell does he think AVP will do that will add so much to productivity? Without more information, this sounds like a ridiculous stupid “failing upwards” male tech bro thing to say that is completely out of touch with reality. To expect his team members to pay for them out of pocket on top of a $350 monthly train bill (that’s a car note!!) is absolutely diseased. Does he have a worm in his brain?
I really wish that we as employees could collectively get it together and learn not to care about shareholder value. As a tech employee myself, I’d like to think I’d laugh a manager like him off the continent. Our motivators should be:
am I able to influence this product so it will be a more positive innovation in the world?
am I getting compensated well? Is what’s happening now conducive to longterm good compensation?
The end. Nowhere should anyone feel they need to buy a $3500 crappy VR set because their power-tripping delusional boss just wants it.
"failing upwards” male tech bro thing to say
Yes. AVP devices would contribute nothing to productivity and I cannot be convinced otherwise. Men just love tech gadgets, and as another poster pointed out the hype around this product has been dead for a while.
His custom-built home resembles a high end office building.
That's just sad.
Exactly, I was thinking "Really? This is what you choose your home to look like?..."
I'm wondering if I'm picturing it better or worse than it actually is now.
It's similar to this home: https://www.berglundarchitects.com/mountain-living-says-this-ultra-modern-vail-home-goes-above-and-beyond
Ugh, I hate these things. Seeing them once in a while is fine, but when blocks get overtaken by these it looks like the world was hit by an alien beam.
Omg yes! They are so jarring and ugly in the mountains too! Oh what a lovely peach sunset over the idyllic snow topped peaks and lovely rolling foothi…insert imposing angular metal and glass McMansion. I know I know, it’s about le aRt and the jUxToPoSiTiOn. I’m just a sucker for a stunning cabin on a mountainside.
Blerk, I wouldn't even want to go to an office like that, never mind live in it.
Ah thanks. It doesn't look bad per se, but it really feels like a commercial building to me, rather than a residential one. It feels like a resort to the point where I wouldn't be surprised if I went to bathroom number 4 and found a whole other family there. Before remembering it's my home and I have no idea why these strangers are here lmao.
This looks nice in the same way a fancy car looks nice. Yes, it is well made and certainly pleasing to the eye, but... it just looks so mechanical and artificial.
Well, whatever, to each his own.
And maybe they should eat cake too?
If his "beautiful young wife" isn't in STEM herself, I feel sorry for her.
She's not in STEM and she's basically a mail order bride.
You need new friends tbh
he's too entertaining to cut off. The male ego is fascinating.
The Apple Vision Pro's fad lasted exactly 2 days, 1 week max if you're that deep into tech. It's soo bad even Apple doesn't promote it on their homepage.
It's a very nonsensical request. I'd love to know how he thought domestic staff's productivity was going to be seriously improved by wearing some ugly goggles on their face. They don't need email and web browsing to vacuum your floor or cook for your kids. 3.5k for what - visual instead of audial calendar notifications? Please.
I had to look it up even though almost every device I own is from Apple and I purchased a speaker in-store just a couple months ago. It is weirdly obscure!
I know people with different brands of headset, and they seem to enjoy them, but I’m confused as to why someone with a domestic staff would want them to “increase productivity.” I only ever see the entertainment capabilities of headsets mentioned and advertised, are they also chore planners or something?
I know one of those. He was once talking in an honestly perplexed tone about why on earth anyone would get a mortgage instead of buying their house for cash. I tried to explain that most people don't have half a million dollars to spare (this was a bunch of years ago when that was a good amount for a reasonably nice place) and he still was bewildered.
Dude thinks people spending a lot of money on a necessity means they must have a lot more money to spend on unnecessary tech toys?
$350/month for commuting is pretty cheap compared to driving in. Sounds like his employees are good with their finances.
My tech bro friends are not as rich as this and consequently not this out-of-touch, but they’re definitely limousine liberals. They talk very matter-of-factly about the evils of capitalism and how much better socialism is, but they don’t do any more socialism than they’re required to by law—they do everything they can to reduce their tax liabilities, they don’t donate to food banks or homeless shelters, and they’re very concerned with preserving their wealth for their kids.
I also don’t like paying taxes and I’m not great about charitable giving! But I’m honest about the fact that I don’t mind capitalism. I’m not out here living that >$250k/year tech salary life while pretending that I would be thrilled to give up 60% of that money to taxes in return for mediocre and over-subscribed government services.
I relate to this post a lot.
It is impossible to reason with an unreasonable person.
These high earners in tech are generally male. They make well above the average household income and are exceptionally stubborn.
They often refuse to cook or complete any of the normal human tasks that young able bodied people are capable of.
They are usually quite intelligent and are able to control people.
They talk about how they will rule the world in a few years thanks to AI and transhumanism. I think many non-tech people believe them or at least humor them too much.
I am not sure what the solution is— they have large amounts of money and influence and control many parts of various tech and finance sectors.
My personal advice is to resist their attacks and not fall into their intellectual traps.