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RantTrying not to cry
I don't have a lot to say and this won't be really eloquent, I just need to get this off my chest before I toss myself out a window ...
I'm a domestic violence counselor. I'm in a workshops series right now (my agency is not the only one taking these and we didn't write any of it). Istg every single presenter makes it a point to repeatedly bring up trans people, "Is your organization rewording its statements to make sure everyone knows they're included? Are you asking clients their pronouns? Are you making sure not to 'deadname' people?" etc etc etc ... Every vital discussion gets sidetracked like this.
I want to cry because we can't just speak about violence against women openly. We can't center women or prioritize our safety. We can't just say, no, actually, we don't give a shit if men feel "included," we're a fucking shelter.
The restrooms at the hotel are gender neutral, the coordinators made sure to announce this.
One of the offered sessions has "TLGBIA+" in its name. I have never seen this before.
I feel like I'm going insane.
POSITIVE UPDATE! I just sat in on a session by a lady who started off by saying, “By the way, I’m older and the fact is most victims are female so I’ll be saying she/her and I think you’re all smart enough to understand that non-female survivors are included in all this.” Lmaooo QUEEN
those things are just stereotypes that come from a long and complicated history with misogyny and backwards traditions
Yes
But now can they understand that stereotypes shouldn't force other people to pretend and give males access to female only spaces and force everyone to go along with an ideology that believes in using "men" and "non-men"
Hmmmm. Despite the T reference, I can't help wondering if grizzcat is a stealth terf trying to deprogram the brainwashed women of r/agender......
I'm not even really trying to rag on these two in particular. I just want to feel some optimism, and I think it's young women and girls like this who feel how wrong the idea of gender is. And maybe I'm projecting some, because I see myself being able to fall for some of this if I grew up completely inundated with its propaganda and believing it to be the truth. But, I broke out of religious programming and I eventually shed my teenage NLOG phase, and that's how I know it's not impossible to move forward. And it starts with these small discomforts and doubts.
"I want to be seen as just a human and not a woman" we all do! It's misogyny that makes people see us as less than human because we are women. None of us want that. And if you feel that sick feeling watching men put on a woman costume and act like what their porn addled brain thinks a woman should be, know that they don't get to decide what women really are. They are liars and charlatans. Woman is a descriptor of your body, nothing more or less. You are free to be whoever you want. Do whatever you want. Act however you want. None of that matters and none of that is relevant to "womanhood"
How can you recognize this but still embrace gender ideology?