31
Need Advice or SupportHow to speak up against pronouns at work?
I think this is a bit of a different case than these questions usually go because it's not about the employees having to put pronouns (yet) but about implementing pronouns in one of our products. Long story short I'm a developer working on a game and someone in the team just suggested we implement a pronoun field for every player. I am obviously against it but I wonder what's the best way to speak up against this and make arguments without giving anyone reason to complain about my transphobia or whatever.
I know that there is at least one other person in the team who would support him in this while I think the others are not necessarily pro trans, I know my team lead would probably be against it but I don't know if he can say that openly.
As for the company itself it generally tries to be pretty young and hip and 'inclusive' however so far pronouns have not been enforced, as it is an option in slack but we don't have to use it.
Society grooms women to wear revealing clothing in general, not just celebrities. Women's swimwear is a tiny bikini that you have to adjust all the time unless you want to reveal your boobs or vulva, while men got to wear pants that cover them to their knees. The same with underwear, panties for women but boxers that cover your upper thighs for men. T-shirts sold for men basically NEVER have cleavage while it's perfectly normal and everyday for women to put their boobs on display via a huge cleavage combined with a push up bra. Formal wear for men (eg. for weddings, conferences, academic events) is a suit where the long sleeves covers them to their ankles and wrists, while women are expected to wear a dress. Just the other day I saw some pictures from a psychology conference and it was so weird to see how the men wore suits during their presentation while the women wore tight, uncomfortable looking dresses and high heels.
Just look at gymnastics and swim team attire. For the last few years, leotards have been creeping up the butt. This year they are full out thongs. Full out. No pretense. Then men compete in shorts or sweatpants. The women need Brazilian waxes and tape to compete in their sport. Same with women’s competitive bathing suits. Almost thongs, while yes, the men are in Speedos, but not thongs. I suspect if the men had to wear speedo thongs (so basically g strings), people would suddenly realize the absurdity of making world class athletes uncomfortable and sexualized.
A bit of good news is that germen women's gymnastics teams successfully got the rules changed so that women and girl can now compete in long unitards like the guys can.
Agreed, this is great news. Except that none of the teams utilize this. My daughter walked in while I was watching gymnastics last week and asked, “why are all of them wearing thongs? I can see their entire butts!” Sigh.
At the acrobatic gymnastics world championships in September 2024, several girls competed in the long leotards. Maybe 20% if I hazard a guess. You can search it on youtube.
Especially odd, since younger women are more likely to get cold than men or older women
One other thing that has been pointed out on magazines. TIFS are topless, showing their bodies or what their bodies can do through pregnancy
TIMs get to wear power suits and display accomplishments
That famous pic of Martine Rothblatt in a power pose vs that TIF reporter in underwear
I never thought of this. TIMs ought to be displayed in objectifying, sexualized ways too. Might peak a few men. But few of them believe they are truly women anyway.
Then as they age, TIMs should be shamed for it.
Society grooms women to wear revealing clothing in general, not just celebrities.
One of the worst parts about this is that women and girls then get shamed for their "slutty" appearance. Even if women and girls want to wear clothing with more coverage--and many do--it can be hard to find. It's all sheer fabric, low necklines, high hemlines, and weird cutouts.
Yes. We are constantly bombarded with images of women with revealing clothing and then get shamed for dressing the way we are encouraged to.
However, with the proliferation of online shopping, Im not sure it's hard to find modest clothing. However, I certainly dont expect 13 yr olds to be well versed in the options, nor able to resist dressing like their friends.
certainlyndont expect 13 yr olds to be well versed in a of the options, nor able to resist dressing like their friends.
Yeah. It's just my personal observation but younger teenage girls seem to feel the pressure to dress a certain way, or experiment with fashion, more strongly than older girls do. For me, it was the peak age of self-consciousness.
or workout wear ;_; I've been looking for months for something that isn't so tight it goes up my crack (or so loose it won't fall down while I'm running)
Yes, it's not just that women's clothing covers less skin, it's also always uncomfortably tight. Even winter coats for women are designed in a way that they are narrower at the waist to emphasise our womanly figure.
I would like some loose-fitting, knee length jogging shorts. I can't find them anywhere, at all.
Yes, I forgot that, when it's summer, men wear shorts that reach down to their knees while women mostly wear shorts that only cover their upper thighs.
That is the fashion for now. But men used to wear skimpy shorts in the 1970's.
But I think this says something about how sex stereotypes are being reinforced more now.
I wear skirts with bike shorts under neath. Comfy, more coverage, and pretty.
I straight up buy men's shorts. It's the only way.
I wish I could do that. I have a dumptruck of a derierre and a pretty high waistline, though, and men's shorts, sweats, pj bottoms, etc. are simply not cut to accomodate that. Even a lot of women's clothes don't fit right. I gotta learn to alter clothes, I spend a lot at the seamstress right now.
Once you learn, you will be so much happier with clothing! I alter a lot of my stuff. There are great tutorials for basics like hemming and making the waistband of pants smaller (while keeping the seat larger) online.
Big same. I'd rather have mid-thigh or shorter for running and long walks because I overheat too easily to wear sportswear with better coverage (not that I can find any...) but the loose fit is what I can't find. I genuinely can't find a single pair of shorts that doesn't feel like it's crushing my genitals, digging into my asscrack, making my hips sore or constricting my thighs (why do people make shorts that are tight where your leg goes???) or all 4 at the same time somehow. I've had one(1) comfy pair my entire life, I wore it until it literally fell apart, and never found a similar model again.
I buy sweatpants and actual pants and hem them to be shorts. The price difference between shorts and pants surprisingly isn’t that much, and so if you know how to hem (it’s very easy!) you can have comfortable shorts at the length you prefer.
I wear men’s basketball shorts and t shirts, even if they look ridiculously big on me
Love you mentioning the bikini and underwear thing. Trying to find a supportive bikini that covers your arse and all of your pubic hair and is also flattering is very difficult! In terms of knickers, Thunderpants do some pricey but very comfortable ones that actually stay put and cover everything! And they look good. Just putting that rec there haha.
How supportive are we talking? Cuz there are plenty of modest swim bottoms here:
They even have pockets.
is the Thunderpants you're talking about? https://www.thunderpants.co.nz strange it shows shipping to NZ US UK/EU what about Australia..
Winced a bit at the models. Poor NZ...
Do you find that Thunderpants run small? I kept sizing up and up, but they were still too constricting for me. Also my disposable menstrual pads don't fit around the crotch. Really wanted to like them, but I finally threw them out this week. I've had luck with Icebreaker's merino wool undies though. Very breathable and they dry quickly.
I get the hipster style and find them true to size. I tried one pair of the normal ones and found them too tight on inner thighs and belly, but the hipsters are super comfy. The crotch is quite wide so I see what you mean re pads - I just put them on and let the wings mostly stick to the outer edges of the gusset a bit like if you put a pad in boy shorts. Those Icebreakers sound good. What style are they? I had some merino boy shorts once but I found they sort of gave wedgies where you don’t want wedgies!
I like the Icebreaker hipkinis, and they just came out with some high cut briefs I might try next time. I hate wearing underwear, but they're thin and breathable and one of the few styles my big butt doesn't eat up. I tried the boy shorts too and they're alright, but I prefer the styles with a thinner waist band for a barely-there feel.
Not just any dress, a strapless one. There's no reason we couldn't have dresses with sleeves. It would make more sense for all attendees to be dressed for the same temperature!!!
The women are dressed like it’s summer in Miami and the men are dressed like it’s March in NY.
Like every single talking head on the various “news” punditry channels: year round, men are dressed conservatively and for the season, women for a midsummer garden party. Not one anywhere near an actual garden, mind you, as the 5-inch stiletto heels might prove problematic.
Ha! The shoes for sure are a problem. However, I’ve noticed, at least in summer, that women are correctly dressed for the weather while men are still wearing undershirts, long-sleeved button down shirts, jackets, and ties, when it’s 90 degrees out. And so offices are air conditioned for them while the women freeze. My office used to have lunchtime exodus of women going outside to warm up.
Not an earthquake of a take but Kanye is such a terrible person and Bianca always looks so miserable with him. He clearly has some kind of fetish where he enjoys humiliating her and he's obsessed with dressing his girlfriends. Kim Kardashian might wear skimpy clothes, but she would never have shown up to a red-carpet completely nude because she has power and agency through her own money and fame. Her couldn't use her like a doll.
Kanye was attracted to Bianca because she kind of resembled Kim and she's since undergone a lot of plastic surgery to make her look even more so. She's not even a person to him. He uses her as a "Haha, I got a new wife that looks just like you except she's younger and obedient." fuck you to Kardashian. I hope Bianca gets away from him soon.
On top of always being sexualized in formal wear at these shows, it's crazy how much more uncomfortable women likely are vs. their male counterparts. These outfits are so tight and then their boobs are painfully shoved up under their chins. And of course the fact that they're all wearing 6 inch heels. Even when they're sitting down it's always so clear that the women at these events are sitting rigidly in their seats while the men are relaxed.
I’m also guessing that many of the women are freezing in their exposed outfits while the men are perfectly comfortable in actual clothing with socks and closed toe shoes. Just like offices, airplanes, etc, the room was probably made cold so that the men in multiple layers of actual clothing would be comfortable.
Kanye is scum and treats Bianca like he's hazing her. I wonder how she'll look back on her time with him when she's a little older.
Do you wonder, really, though? I think we know!
I watched a clip of her removing the fur coat and she looks deeply uncomfortable. Kanye definitely talked her into it (bullied? whined?) as a sadistic power trip.
In every single image I’ve ever seen of the two of them together she looks traumatized. Like a deer in the headlights. Or her eyes are sort of unfocused, like she’s been drugged or is some sort of robot under his control.
I’m convinced he was always abusive to Kim Kardashian, which really started to show in public when she tried to leave. I think he’s enjoying the ability to abuse a woman who is less powerful than his ex—if anything he seems to view this new woman as a proxy for Kim, someone to humiliate and take out his rage against her on.
He’s disgusting. I think they must be engaging in some dark role play or something. Humiliation and the like. For him to parade her like he does.
There was also an OF model he offered to pay if she deleted her account and I believe worked with him exclusively. Pretty sure he’s up to Diddy shit.
He is absolutely up to Diddy shit. I believe you're referring to his personal/executive assistant, Lauren Pisciotta (an OF millionaire), who filed a lawsuit against him alleging drugging, sex trafficking, sexual harrassment, sexual abuse, and hostile work environment. It's a doozy because she was probably helping procure women for him but I believe her and wish her the best. Linked video breaks it down very well if you're interested and need moral support to get through it.
Edit: phrasing
Yes! That’s her, thank you so much for adding info and clarity to my comment!